Mel Robbins: The #1 Skill To Master To Create Your Most Abundant Life

Mel details her personal journey of confronting a suppressed childhood trauma that resulted in years of self-doubt, anxiety, and stress, and how she overcame it through various self-help techniques.

Mel Recounts Suppressing a Traumatic Childhood Experience Until Her 30s, Causing Self-Doubt, Anxiety, and a Chronic Fight-Or-flight Response

Mel recalls waking up during a ski trip in the fourth grade to find an older child on top of her. She sensed something was wrong but couldn't remember the events that followed. This traumatic experience was suppressed until her early 30s, leaving her with feelings of self-doubt and anxiety every morning. Mel's body responded with a fight-or-flight reaction each day due to the unprocessed memory from when she was ten years old – a time when she lacked the ability to attribute her feelings to the incident, causing her to mistakenly blame herself.

Unprocessed Trauma as Self-Criticism, Need For Control, and High-Stress Busyness in Adulthood

These childhood experiences manifested in adulthood as a chronic state of self-criticism, the need to control every situation, and an overwhelming sense of busyness driven by high stress. Mel suggests that the unprocessed trauma was at the root of these behaviors.

Mel's Path to Self-Acceptance: Identifying Behavioral Roots and Using Meditation, Cold Exposure, and Vocal Toning for Nervous System Management

Mel discusses the vagus nerve's crucial role as the nervous system's on-off switch. She highlights techniques to tone the vagus nerve for better mental health. Humming, which vibrates the vocal cords, can prevent panic attacks and is one form of toning. Cold plunging, where one breathes through the shock of cold exposure, is another method she mentions for calming the nervous ...

Mel Robbins expresses amazement at the unexpected success of her book, "The Let Them Theory," which not only tops sales charts but also resonates deeply with a broad audience seeking guidance in tumultuous times.

Mel Was Stunned by Her Book, "The Let Them Theory," a #1 Bestseller

Robbins shares her astonishment at the success of "The Let Them Theory," which has consistently held the number one spot on Amazon and has earned a place on the New York Times bestseller list. She likens the moment of realization to other significant life events, such as getting married or launching a business. Her humility is evident as she articulates her surprise at the massive sales, international recognition, and the profound impact, which surpassed her expectations.

Mel Credits Her Grounding Ability To Self-Work and Avoiding Media "Noise" By Living Rurally

Despite the surge in recognition, Robbins maintains a sense of humility and balance, partly thanks to her rural lifestyle in Vermont. This physical distance from media and public attention has helped her stay grounded and focused on her work rather than on external validation. She credits this quieter life—solidified by moving to Vermont during the pandemic—as instrumental in keeping her unfazed by her newfound fame.

Mel Attributes Her Success To Fulfilling a Cultural Need Rather Than Just Personal Achievements

Mel Prioritizes Reader Impact Over External Success Measures

Robbins believes that the appeal of her book lies in its message of focusing on what is within one's control, a concept reflected in various wisdom traditions like stoicism and Buddhism. She asserts that tapping into this widespread need for guidance is what propelled her book to success, rather than it being about her individual accomplishments. Rob ...

Mel Robbins shares valuable insights into combating the common obstacles of self-doubt and discouragement that can hinder achieving personal and professional goals.

Mel Highlights Self-Doubt and Discouragement As Major Obstacles To Achieving Goals

Mel Robbins delves deep into her own experiences with self-doubt and discourse and how they've played a role in keeping her from reaching her full potential. She openly discusses the importance of doing grueling, boring tasks and the difficulty of pushing oneself to do things they don't feel like doing. Robbins emphasizes that not quitting on those tasks is essential to achieve one's goals. Robbins also emphasizes that doubt often stems from worrying about other people’s opinions and can be a significant hindrance to success, and that discouragement can come even when resources, like Google or ChatGPT, are easily accessible, because if individuals don’t believe the steps they read about will work for them, they won’t take action.

Mel Shares Her Proactive Management of These Tendencies Using the "5-4-3-2-1" Technique

To proactively manage these obstacles, Robbins refers to her own invention, the "5-4-3-2-1" technique, which helps her get out of bed and overcome reluctance. She also cites this method as a tool to move past the paralysis of discouragement that can prevent taking action. Robbins highlights using this countdown technique as a daily battle, even for disliked tasks such as folding laundry or unloading the dishwasher, to overcome feelings of discouragement.

Mel Warns Against Trying to Control External Factors, Recommends "Let Them" Philosophy

Robbins advocates for the philosophy of letting go of the need to control external factors. She talks about "time traveling" as a technique where reflecting on past events helps develop faith in one's own ability to navigate life's challenges, suggesting this reflection can be applied to future challenges as well. Mel cautions against the unre ...

Mel Robbins and Lewis Howes discuss the transformative impact of choosing collaboration over competition in both professional and personal growth.

Mel Advises Supporting Peers, Not Viewing As Competitors

Mel Robbins speaks to the importance of relationships and mutual support within an industry.

Mel Emphasizes the Value of Like-Minded Peers For Support and Collaboration Opportunities

Mel Robbins emphasizes the value of surrounding oneself with like-minded individuals who prioritize personal growth, learning, and support. She considers it critical to remember those who supported your journey, mentioning Lewis Howes as one such individual who significantly helped her when nobody knew who she was. Mel suggests that attendees of inspiring events, showing an interest in personal growth and learning, embody this idea of supporting peers instead of viewing them as competition. She highlights that many podcasters are actually great friends, which is beneficial as they understand the pressures and challenges that may be beyond family comprehension.

Robbins advises that viewing others in the same industry as potential friends and allies can be a substantial source of support for your business ventures. She underlines the mistake of seeing other entrepreneurs as competition, suggesting they should be viewed as the best friends who understand the unique struggles of the industry. This perspective not only fosters collaborative opportunities but also contributes to a more supportive industry environment.

Mel and Lewis Celebrate Success and Encourage Audience Support

Mel and Lewis exemplify the positive outcomes of a collaborative rather than competitive mindset.

Mel Welcomes the Possibility of Lewis' Book Surpassing Hers, Reflecting Abundance Over Scarcity

Mel Robbins expresses excitement at the prospect of Lewis Howes' book potentially surpassing her own achievements, reflecting a spirit of abundance rather than scarcity. She acknowledges the importance of showing up for people and putting out positivity, especially during challenging times. During their di ...