Podcasts > The School of Greatness > The #1 Cause of Breakups & The Spiritual Secret To Attracting Healthy Love | David Ghiyam

The #1 Cause of Breakups & The Spiritual Secret To Attracting Healthy Love | David Ghiyam

By Lewis Howes

In this episode of The School of Greatness, David Ghiyam shares his perspective on how souls choose certain relationships and challenges to facilitate spiritual growth and transformation. From Ghiyam's insights, listeners gain an understanding of karmic principles related to manifestation—specifically, how self-worth impacts the ability to attract healthy relationships, abundance, and fulfillment.

The conversation explores the idea that embracing certainty, acceptance, and unconditional giving can align individuals with a higher vibration and unlock their fullest potential. Ghiyam stresses the importance of reframing difficulties as opportunities, emphasizing his belief that every relationship—even toxic ones—holds divine lessons for personal evolution.

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The #1 Cause of Breakups & The Spiritual Secret To Attracting Healthy Love | David Ghiyam

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The #1 Cause of Breakups & The Spiritual Secret To Attracting Healthy Love | David Ghiyam

1-Page Summary

The Spiritual/Karmic Principles Behind Relationships and Manifestation

Souls Choose Challenges and Relationships For Growth and Transformation

According to speakers like David Ghiyam, souls enter life with spiritual baggage and choose parents and experiences, like betrayal or narcissistic relationships, that reflect their unworthiness and provide opportunities for growth. Ghiyam states souls are attracted to people mirroring their weaknesses and fears, providing opponents to refine the soul. Toxic relationships, though difficult, thus serve to confront deep limitations.

Infinite Destinies: Elevate To a Higher Destiny By Transforming During Challenges

Ghiyam explains that while paths are predetermined, free will allows shifting to higher destinies through transforming one's nature during challenges. Embracing certainty, acceptance, and unconditional giving helps align with a godly vibration and access richer predestined lives.

Self-Awareness and Transforming Limiting Beliefs About Deserving Abundance and Love

Love, Abundance, and Fulfillment Tied To Self-Worth and Deserving Beliefs

Ghiyam believes our self-perception impacts achieving love, wealth, and success. Feeling undeserving creates self-sabotage and relationship patterns reinforcing negative beliefs. Healing involves recognizing our birthright to live greatly.

Becoming "one" With Ourselves Is Key To Attracting a Soulmate and Abundant Life

Though not defining the process, Ghiyam highlights inner growth, knowing desires, and boundaries as important. He implies self-awareness and boundary-setting attract compatible partners and circumstances.

Seeing Relationships and Challenges As Growth Opportunities

Every Relationship, Even Toxic, Offers Spiritual Growth Opportunities

Ghiyam suggests difficult relationships provide divine lessons activating parts needing improvement, per Kabbalah. Blessing painful relationships can accelerate growth and harmony. His divorces exemplify opportunities for evolution.

Certainty, Acceptance, and Unconditional Giving: Keys To Manifesting Our Best Life

Ghiyam states expressing certainty, gratitude, and selflessness unlocks potential. Shifting from victimhood to empowerment and service activates creative universal forces. This mindset changed his purpose positively.

1-Page Summary

Additional Materials

Clarifications

  • When it is mentioned that souls carry spiritual baggage, it implies that individuals bring unresolved issues or challenges from past experiences into their current life. Choosing parents and experiences based on unworthiness means that individuals may subconsciously seek out situations that reflect their feelings of inadequacy or lack of self-worth, providing opportunities for growth and transformation in addressing these deep-seated issues. This concept suggests that our life circumstances and relationships are not random but are intricately linked to our inner struggles and lessons that our soul seeks to learn and evolve from.
  • When it is mentioned that souls are attracted to people who mirror their weaknesses and fears for soul refinement, it implies that individuals may unconsciously seek out relationships that reflect aspects of themselves they need to work on or heal. This dynamic can serve as a catalyst for personal growth and self-awareness by presenting opportunities to confront and overcome deep-seated limitations. By engaging with individuals who mirror their vulnerabilities, individuals are provided with a chance to evolve and transform those aspects of themselves, ultimately leading to spiritual development and advancement on their life path.
  • Elevating to a higher destiny through transforming one's nature during challenges means that when faced with difficult situations, individuals have the opportunity to grow and evolve by changing their perspectives, behaviors, and beliefs. By embracing these challenges and actively working on personal growth, individuals can shift towards a more positive and fulfilling life path. This process involves learning from hardships, developing resilience, and making conscious choices that align with a more elevated and purposeful existence. Ultimately, it is about using challenges as catalysts for personal transformation and moving towards a higher state of being.
  • Understanding the connection between self-perception, love, wealth, and success involves recognizing how our beliefs about deserving impact our ability to attract positive experiences. When we feel unworthy or undeserving, it can lead to self-sabotage and patterns that hinder our relationships and financial abundance. Transforming limiting beliefs about self-worth is crucial for aligning with love, wealth, and success in life. By acknowledging our inherent value and worthiness, we can break free from negative cycles and open ourselves up to receiving the abundance and fulfillment we deserve.
  • Understanding toxic relationships as opportunities for spiritual growth involves seeing challenging and negative experiences as catalysts for personal development and self-awareness. By facing and working through difficulties within toxic relationships, individuals can confront their own limitations, fears, and weaknesses, leading to inner growth and transformation. Embracing the lessons and growth potential within toxic relationships can ultimately lead to greater self-awareness, resilience, and spiritual evolution. This perspective encourages individuals to view challenges as opportunities for learning, healing, and ultimately, positive change.
  • Certainty, acceptance, and unconditional giving play crucial roles in manifesting one's best life by fostering a positive mindset and alignment with higher vibrations. Certainty involves unwavering belief in one's goals and desires, creating a strong energetic pull towards manifestation. Acceptance allows for letting go of resistance and embracing the present moment, opening up space for new opportunities to flow in. Unconditional giving involves acts of generosity and kindness without expecting anything in return, which can attract abundance and positive energy into one's life.

Counterarguments

  • The concept of souls choosing challenges and relationships is not empirically verifiable and relies on spiritual beliefs that not everyone shares.
  • The idea that toxic relationships are necessary for growth can be dangerous, as it might lead individuals to stay in harmful situations instead of seeking help or leaving.
  • Predetermination and free will are philosophically contentious concepts, and it's debatable whether they can coexist as described.
  • The notion that embracing certain virtues aligns one with a "godly vibration" is a spiritual belief that may not resonate with those of different faiths or with non-religious individuals.
  • The impact of self-perception on success is a complex topic, and while it plays a role, there are also external factors beyond individual control that can affect one's ability to achieve love, wealth, and success.
  • The idea that everyone has a birthright to live greatly oversimplifies the socio-economic and cultural factors that limit opportunities for many individuals.
  • Attracting a soulmate and an abundant life is not solely dependent on inner growth and self-awareness; external circumstances and chance also play significant roles.
  • The suggestion that every relationship offers spiritual growth opportunities may not acknowledge the full psychological impact of truly toxic or abusive relationships.
  • The concept of blessing painful relationships to accelerate growth may not be appropriate for everyone, especially those who have experienced trauma.
  • The principles of certainty, gratitude, and selflessness as keys to unlocking potential are not universally applicable and may not lead to the desired outcomes for everyone.
  • The idea of shifting from victimhood to empowerment is a positive message, but it may inadvertently blame individuals for their circumstances without acknowledging systemic issues.

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The #1 Cause of Breakups & The Spiritual Secret To Attracting Healthy Love | David Ghiyam

The Spiritual/Karmic Principles Behind Relationships and Manifestation

David Ghiyam and other speakers explore the notion that souls select challenges and relationships as opportunities for growth and transformation, suggesting that our lives are shaped by both predetermined paths and the exercise of free will.

Souls Choose Challenges and Relationships For Growth and Transformation

Souls enter life with spiritual baggage and the desire to heal through life experiences. David Ghiyam discusses how souls often attract people who reflect their own feelings of unworthiness, such as narcissists. He argues that souls come into this world with karmic debt and choose parents that resonate with the experiences that will help them evolve. For instance, if a soul carries a fear of abandonment, it must transcend this negativity to create miracles in life. According to Kabbalah, souls have preexisting issues from a past life and select circumstances that will help them confront these issues.

Souls Enter With Spiritual Baggage and Desires to Heal Through Life Experiences

Ghiyam expands on the idea that souls are attracted to certain individuals and situations that mirror the spiritual baggage they carry. This manifests in life when they select the parents and situations necessary for the soul's journey, including experiences like betrayal, which they are here to cleanse and correct. This cycle of correction may even involve re-experiencing similar circumstances with the same souls from past lives.

We Attract People and Circumstances to Overcome Weaknesses and Activate Our Potential

Ghiyam explains the soul's desire for an opponent to challenge and refine it, effectively attracting people and circumstances that enable us to confront our weaknesses and activate our latent potential. He suggests that these leanings originate from the soul’s goals and struggles designed for its spiritual development.

Toxic Relationships Serve to Confront and Transform Our Deepest Fears and Limitations

Ghiyam delves into the idea that toxic relationships, though difficult, serve a greater purpose by forcing individuals to confront their deepest fears and limitations. He encourages reframing the narrative around painful relationships, as labeling past relationships as toxic can impede personal growth.

Infinite Destinies: Elevate To a Higher Destiny By Transforming During Challenges

According to Ghiyam, each soul has a predetermined pathway fraught with challenges but rich in potential rewards such as enhanced life experiences.

Pre-programmed Paths Exist, but Free Will Allows ...

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The Spiritual/Karmic Principles Behind Relationships and Manifestation

Additional Materials

Clarifications

  • Kabbalah is an esoteric method in Jewish mysticism that seeks to explain the inner meaning of Jewish religious texts and practices. It originated in 12th-13th century Spain and Southern France, with the Zohar being a foundational text. Kabbalists believe in a hidden, mystical dimension to Jewish teachings and rituals. It has been influential in Jewish thought and spirituality for centuries.
  • The term "vibration of godliness" typically refers to embodying qualities associated with divinity or a higher spiritual state, such as love, compassion, kindness, and wisdom. It suggests aligning one's energy and actions with positive, uplifting, and spiritually elevated principles. ...

Counterarguments

  • The concept of souls choosing challenges and relationships is not empirically verifiable and relies on spiritual or religious beliefs that may not be universally accepted.
  • The idea of spiritual baggage and karmic debt presupposes belief in reincarnation, which is specific to certain religious or spiritual traditions and not a universally held view.
  • Attributing the attraction of certain people and situations to spiritual baggage could be seen as an oversimplification of complex psychological and social dynamics.
  • The notion that souls choose their parents and life situations can be controversial as it might imply that individuals are responsible for the hardships they face, which could be seen as victim-blaming.
  • The idea that we attract opponents to refine us may overlook the role of chance, environmental factors, and other people's agency in shaping our relationships.
  • Labeling relationships as toxic and then suggesting they serve a purpose for growth could be seen as minimizing the real harm and trauma that such relationships can cause.
  • The belief in pre-programmed paths and destiny may conflict with some philosophic ...

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The #1 Cause of Breakups & The Spiritual Secret To Attracting Healthy Love | David Ghiyam

Self-Awareness and Transforming Limiting Beliefs About Deserving Abundance and Love

Love, Abundance, and Fulfillment Tied To Self-Worth and Deserving Beliefs

David Ghiyam emphasizes the close connection between our self-perception and our ability to achieve love, abundance, and success in life. By channeling energy to assist others in finding their soulmate and wealth according to spiritual laws, Ghiyam believes the universe will fulfill his own needs.

Belief in Undeservedness Leads To Self-Sabotage and Relationship Patterns

Ghiyam identifies that a feeling of undeservingness can lead individuals to subconsciously repel wealth and attract relationships that reinforce negative beliefs. This self-sabotage is further exemplified when someone rejects a compliment, inadvertently harming the giver of the compliment. Reflecting on his own experiences, Ghiyam shares how his belief that he did not deserve to receive led to considerable financial struggles until he shifted that mindset.

Healing Limiting Beliefs to Manifest Love, Money, and Success

Although Ghiyam does not explicitly discuss methods for healing limiting beliefs, he outlines a philosophy that recognizes receiving as powerful and necessary. He describes a pie chart of beliefs, where conflicting feelings about what one deserves can lead to behavior that undermines one's ambitions for a healthy relationship. It is suggested that healing involves acknowledging that it's our birthright to live greatly in every life aspect.

Becoming "one" With Ourselves Is Key To Attracting a Soulmate and Abundant Life

Despite not explicitly defining the process of becoming 'one' with oneself, Ghiyam underscores the importance of inner growth and knowing one's desires and boundaries.

Building Our Spiritual Vessel and Serving: A Path to Fulfillment Beyond Others

Ghiyam shares how crea ...

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Self-Awareness and Transforming Limiting Beliefs About Deserving Abundance and Love

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Counterarguments

  • The connection between self-perception and success is not always direct; external factors such as socioeconomic status, education, and opportunity also play significant roles.
  • Some individuals may experience undeservedness but still achieve success and healthy relationships, suggesting other factors can mitigate or override self-sabotage.
  • The concept of healing limiting beliefs is not universally accepted or empirically proven, and some may argue that practical strategies and actions are more effective.
  • The idea of becoming 'one' with oneself is abstract and may not resonate with everyone; some may find fulfillment through external achievements or relationships.
  • The notion that serving others will lead to personal abu ...

Actionables

  • You can start a daily affirmation practice to reshape your self-perception by writing down three positive statements about yourself each morning. This helps reinforce a positive self-image and counteract feelings of undeservedness. For example, affirmations could be "I am worthy of love," "I am capable of achieving success," or "I am deserving of abundance."
  • Create a 'desire and boundary' journal where you regularly record your personal goals and limits. This practice encourages inner growth by making you actively think about what you truly want and where you draw the line, which can help in attracting a soulmate and living an abundant life. For instance, list the qualities you seek in a partner or the minimum salary you would accept for a job that aligns with your values.
  • Volunteer for a cause you're passionate ...

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The #1 Cause of Breakups & The Spiritual Secret To Attracting Healthy Love | David Ghiyam

Seeing Relationships and Challenges As Growth Opportunities

David Ghiyam discusses the Kabbalistic viewpoint that the soul chooses the adversities it faces, including those in relationships, for spiritual growth. According to this perspective, every relationship, even toxic ones, and every challenge that comes our way serves a divine purpose on our journey towards spiritual evolution.

Every Relationship, Even Toxic, Offers Spiritual Growth Opportunities

Challenging Relationships Are Divine Lessons for Our Evolution

Ghiyam suggests that even relationships fraught with betrayal and pain offer opportunities for spiritual growth, providing necessary experiences for the soul's transformation. From the Kabbalistic viewpoint, challenging relationships are divine lessons. Ghiyam emphasizes that relationships, including painful ones, are lessons meant for spiritual growth and are part of a divine plan to activate parts of us that need addressing or improvement.

Blessing Painful Relationships Accelerates Spiritual Growth and Opens Doors To Harmony

Henderson talks about the importance of blessing and showing love to past partners to advance one’s spiritual journey. By understanding the spiritual purpose behind painful relationships, such as correcting past mistakes, one can potentially accelerate spiritual growth and find greater harmony in life. Ghiyam shares that his own experiences, including separations and divorces, which often arise from pain, are opportunities for personal and spiritual growth.

Certainty, Acceptance, and Unconditional Giving: Keys To Manifesting Our Best Life

Faith, Gratitude, and Selflessness in Adversity Unlock Our Potential

Ghiyam explains that expressing certainty in the goodness of all situations, even challenging ones, and maintaining gratitude can unlock a person's potential ...

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Seeing Relationships and Challenges As Growth Opportunities

Additional Materials

Counterarguments

  • The idea that every relationship, including toxic ones, offers spiritual growth opportunities may overlook the potential harm and long-term psychological damage that can result from such relationships. It's important to recognize when a relationship is detrimental to one's well-being and to prioritize personal safety and mental health.
  • While challenging relationships can indeed serve as lessons, it's not always clear what those lessons are, and some individuals may struggle to find meaning or growth in painful experiences. This can lead to feelings of confusion or frustration rather than evolution.
  • The notion of blessing painful relationships and showing love to past partners might not be feasible or healthy for everyone, especially if those relationships were abusive or traumatic. For some, moving on may require setting firm boundaries and disengaging from the past rather than focusing on it.
  • The concept of certainty and acceptance in all situations, including adverse ones, may not account for the complex emotions and valid responses to hardship, such as grief, anger, or the need for change.
  • Unconditional giving is an ideal that may not always be practical or reciprocated in real-world relationships, which can lead to exploitati ...

Actionables

  • Create a "Spiritual Growth Journal" to reflect on past relationships and identify the lessons they've taught you. Start by writing down the details of a challenging relationship, then focus on what you learned from it and how it contributed to your personal growth. For example, if a past partner was overly critical, you might have learned the value of self-compassion and setting boundaries.
  • Develop a "Blessing Routine" where you dedicate a few minutes each day to send positive thoughts or prayers to people who have challenged you. This could be as simple as lighting a candle and silently expressing your gratitude for the growth they've spurred in you, or writing their names on slips of paper and placing them in a 'blessing bowl' as a symbolic gesture of release and goodwill.
  • Engage in a "Service Swap" with friends or community members where you offer your s ...

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