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Achieve 70% MORE SUCCESS: 3 Visualization HACKS to Boost Your CONFIDENCE

By Lewis Howes

In this episode of The School of Greatness, Ed Mylett and guests explore the essence of self-confidence and share strategies for building genuine self-assurance from within. They delve into the power of intention, positive self-talk, and visualization techniques to overcome insecurity and program one's mindset for success.

The conversation also touches on the importance of living purposefully in the present moment, aligning actions with core values, and serving others. Mylett and his guests discuss shedding external identities and societal expectations to connect with one's fundamental, authentic self beyond roles and achievements. Overall, the episode provides insights and practical tips for developing confidence, embracing one's innate strengths, and living with purpose and intention.

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Achieve 70% MORE SUCCESS: 3 Visualization HACKS to Boost Your CONFIDENCE

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Achieve 70% MORE SUCCESS: 3 Visualization HACKS to Boost Your CONFIDENCE

1-Page Summary

Overcoming Insecurity and Building Genuine Self-Confidence

Ed Mylett acknowledges coexisting insecurity alongside "superhuman confidence" internally, realizing that confidence stems from within, not external achievements. He links confidence to intention over abilities, adopting a "one more" mindset to keep promises to oneself. Mylett cites the importance of faith, positive associations, and a service-oriented approach in developing self-assurance.

Mel Robbins notes that simple gestures like high-fives powerfully impact confidence and intention-setting can boost it.

The Power of the Mind and Programming Positive Self-Talk

Mylett describes the reticular activating system (RAS) as life's "filter," influenced by our focus. Visualization exercises can program the RAS to notice desired outcomes. Robbins emphasizes disrupting negative self-talk by visualizing "heart shapes," using countdown tricks, and disassociating from intrusive thoughts.

Living with Presence, Purpose, and Intention

Mylett reflects on letting go of future-orientation and recommends techniques like putting away phones to stay engaged presently. McConaughey discusses balancing future aspirations with savoring current moments.

Both stress aligning actions with core values and serving others as key to living purposefully. McConaughey advocates identifying innate talents meeting societal needs, while Mylett cites the impact of helping his father.

Shedding Identities to Connect with One's Core Self

McConaughey describes stripping away external identifiers to discover his fundamental self beyond roles. Mylett shares feeling truly loved unconditionally by his father, detached from accomplishments.

McConaughey advocates understanding contradictory perspectives, embracing the complexity of truth existing in the overlap between extremes.

1-Page Summary

Additional Materials

Clarifications

  • Ed Mylett's concept of coexisting insecurity and "superhuman confidence" suggests that individuals can feel both insecure and incredibly confident simultaneously. This idea highlights the complexity of human emotions and mindset, showing that even those with high levels of confidence can still experience moments of self-doubt or insecurity. Mylett emphasizes the importance of acknowledging and managing these conflicting feelings to cultivate genuine self-confidence and resilience. This concept underscores the idea that true confidence comes from within, independent of external validations or achievements.
  • The reticular activating system (RAS) is a network of neurons in the brainstem that filters incoming information, determining what is important and what can be ignored. It plays a crucial role in regulating arousal and attention, helping us focus on what we deem significant. By programming the RAS through visualization and positive self-talk, we can direct our attention towards our goals and desired outcomes. This process can enhance our ability to notice opportunities and resources that align with our intentions.
  • Balancing future aspirations with savoring current moments involves finding a harmony between working towards long-term goals while also appreciating and enjoying the present experiences and moments in life. It's about not getting so caught up in planning for the future that you forget to live in the now, finding a way to be present and engaged in the current moment while still working towards your dreams and ambitions. This balance allows for personal growth and progress while also fostering gratitude and mindfulness in everyday life. It's a mindset that values both the journey towards future success and the beauty of the present moment.
  • Shedding external identifiers to connect with one's core self involves letting go of labels, roles, and societal expectations to discover one's true essence beyond superficial attributes. It's about stripping away the layers of identity that are influenced by external factors like job titles, achievements, or material possessions to uncover the authentic self underneath. This process often requires introspection, self-reflection, and a willingness to explore one's values, beliefs, and desires independent of external validation. By detaching from external markers of identity, individuals can better understand and embrace their intrinsic qualities, leading to a deeper sense of self-awareness and authenticity.

Counterarguments

  • While confidence may stem from within, external achievements can also play a significant role in building self-esteem and should not be entirely discounted.
  • The "one more" mindset could potentially lead to burnout if not balanced with self-care and rest.
  • Faith and positive associations may not be universally applicable or effective for everyone in developing self-assurance, as individuals have different belief systems and social environments.
  • Simple gestures like high-fives might not be impactful for everyone, as people have different responses to physical touch and motivational cues.
  • Intention-setting can be beneficial, but without actionable steps and perseverance, intentions alone may not lead to confidence or success.
  • The concept of the RAS might be oversimplified in the context of visualization exercises, as the brain's filtering system is complex and not fully understood.
  • Visualization and positive self-talk are helpful tools, but they may not be sufficient for individuals with deep-seated psychological issues or mental health disorders.
  • The advice to put away phones and other distractions to stay present may not acknowledge the necessity of technology in modern life, including its role in productivity and connectivity.
  • The idea of balancing future aspirations with savoring current moments might be challenging for individuals in precarious situations where future planning is critical for survival.
  • Serving others is a noble pursuit, but it should not come at the expense of one's own well-being or lead to self-neglect.
  • The process of shedding identities to connect with one's core self may not be feasible or desirable for everyone, as some individuals find strength and identity in their roles and social connections.
  • Embracing the complexity of truth in contradictory perspectives is valuable, but there may be situations where a clear stance is necessary for moral or ethical reasons.

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Achieve 70% MORE SUCCESS: 3 Visualization HACKS to Boost Your CONFIDENCE

Overcoming Insecurity and Building Genuine Self-Confidence

Ed Mylett and other thought leaders share their perspectives on developing genuine self-confidence in the face of inherent insecurity, while Mel Robbins discusses the role of non-verbal encouragement in empowering individuals.

Cultivating self-confidence despite an insecure default personality

Mylett notes that genuine confidence is not about acquiring external things, sharing that achievements like owning an island don't boost his confidence because true confidence arises internally. He speaks of having "superhuman confidence in spite of my insecurity," suggesting that it's possible to have confidence coexist with feelings of insecurity.

Recognizing that self-confidence is an internal game, not dependent on external achievements

Mylett learned that positive emotions like happiness already existed within him and did not need to be sought externally. He understands that these emotions were always present since childhood but were obscured due to societal programming and experiences.

Linking self-confidence to intention over abilities or results

He reflects on his past belief that love had to be earned through achievements and how he often criticized himself for his mistakes. Mylett has now realized that love is unconditional and should not be conditioned upon worth or constant achievement. Further, he talks about the concept of equanimity and the ability to remain calm under pressure, much like athletes such as Tom Brady.

Developing a "one more" mindset to build a habit of keeping promises to oneself, Mylett discusses his “One More Standard,” where doing the task plus "one more" serves as a means to surpass expectations and maintain commitments to oneself.

Harnessing the power of faith, associations, and a service-oriented mindset

Maintaining faith, regardless of circumstances, to bolster confidence

Mylett believes that one's confidence can be strengthened by their faith, which remains constant regardless of circumstances. He discusses how faith played a pivotal role in his understanding of the profound impact a stranger had on his father's life by helping him get sober.

Surrounding oneself with positive, encouraging associations

Mylett also acknowledges the importance of positive influences or "associations" that can significantly alter one's levels of self-confidence.

Prioritizing the intention to help others as a source o ...

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Overcoming Insecurity and Building Genuine Self-Confidence

Additional Materials

Clarifications

  • Equanimity is a state of mental calmness and composure, especially in challenging situations. It involves maintaining emotional balance and not being overly reactive to external circumstances. It is about staying centered and grounded regardless of the pressures or stressors one may face. Equanimity helps individuals respond thoughtfully rather than react impulsively in difficult moments.
  • The "One More Standard" is a mindset introduced by Ed Mylett that involves going beyond what is required by doing an additional task or action after completing the initial goal. It is a strategy to push oneself further, exceed expectations, and reinforce the habit of keeping promises to oneself. This approach helps in building discipline, resilience, and a sense of accomplishment by consistently striving for more than the minimum effort. The concept emphasizes continuous improvement and personal growth through incremental steps and a commitment to self-improvement.
  • Maintaining faith regardless of circumstances involves holding onto a belief or trust in something larger than oneself, even when faced with challenging or uncertain situations. It often serves as a source of strength and resilience during difficult times, providing a sense of stability and hope beyond immediate circumstances. This faith can be in various forms, such as religious beliefs, personal convictions, or trust in a positive outcome despite present obstacles. It acts as a guiding force that helps individuals navigate adversity with a sense of purpose and confidence in a better future.
  • Positive associations, in the context of self-confidence, refer to surrounding oneself with supportive and encouraging individuals who uplift and inspire. These associations can influence one's beliefs about themselves, providing validation and fostering a sense of worth and capability. By engaging with po ...

Counterarguments

  • Genuine confidence can be influenced by external achievements, as they can provide tangible evidence of one's capabilities and reinforce self-belief.
  • While self-confidence is largely an internal game, external factors such as social feedback and environmental conditions can significantly impact one's self-perception.
  • The concept of unconditional love is idealistic, and in practice, people often find that their feelings or the love they receive can be influenced by their actions and achievements.
  • The "one more" mindset could lead to burnout or an unhealthy obsession with overachievement if not balanced with self-care and realistic expectations.
  • Faith can be a source of strength for many, but reliance on faith alone may not be sufficient for building confidence in all individuals, especially those who are non-religious or who have different coping mechanisms.
  • While positive associations are beneficial, over-reliance on others for confidence can prevent the development of self-reliance and personal coping strategies.
  • Focusing on ...

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Achieve 70% MORE SUCCESS: 3 Visualization HACKS to Boost Your CONFIDENCE

The Power of the Mind and Programming Positive Self-Talk

Experts, including Ed Mylett and Mel Robbins, discuss how to leverage the reticular activating system (RAS) and replace negative self-talk with positive patterns to reshape one's reality.

Leveraging the reticular activating system (RAS) to reshape one's reality

Understanding how the RAS filters information and confirms beliefs

Ed Mylett describes the RAS as the "filter for your entire life," highlighting its role in what we perceive around us. He uses the example of how, after purchasing a Tesla, he started to notice Teslas everywhere, because the RAS brings into focus what we concentrate on. Robbins likens the RAS to a bouncer at a bar, determining what stimuli to block and what to allow into our consciousness, as we're constantly bombarded by an enormous amount of information equivalent to 34 days of cellphone data every day.

Using visualization to program the RAS towards desired outcomes

Repeated visualization, Mylett advises, can reprogram the RAS to highlight desired elements in one's life, such as relationships and thoughts. Imagination is key, as it enables the creation of novel ideas which then compel both the brain and the universe to fulfill. Robbins emphasizes visualizing not just the goals but the bridge between the current reality and the desired outcomes, including potential challenges and hard work. This type of visualization can prime the mind for the effort and resilience required. She articulates a practice that involves visualizing naturally occurring heart shapes and celebrating when seeing them, encouraging the brain to notice and "supercharge" positive opportunities.

Interrupting and replacing negative self-talk

Becoming aware of negative thought patterns and actively redirecting them

Mylett and Robbins stress the importance of self-awareness in identifying and changing limiting beliefs and negative thought patterns, some of which may be deeply ingrained from a young age. Mylett speaks of recognizing his own "emotional home" of chaos and actively redirecting his thoughts to healthier ones. Robbins introduces a "five second rule" to interrupt negative thoughts and regain a moment of control. She advocates for the acknowledgment of the negative thought and the conscious decision to not continue dwelling on it.

Robbins also recommends using physical gestures such as the high-five habit to disrupt negative self-talk and transition to a more positiv ...

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The Power of the Mind and Programming Positive Self-Talk

Additional Materials

Clarifications

  • The reticular activating system (RAS) is a network of neurons in the brainstem that plays a crucial role in regulating wakefulness and sleep. It acts as a filter for incoming sensory information, helping the brain prioritize what to focus on and what to ignore. The RAS is involved in attention, consciousness, and alertness, influencing what we perceive and how we interpret the world around us. By understanding and leveraging the RAS, individuals can potentially reshape their reality by focusing on desired outcomes and patterns of thinking.
  • Visualization to program the RAS involves using mental imagery to create detailed scenarios of desired outcomes. By repeatedly visualizing these positive scenarios, you are essentially training your brain to recognize and focus on opportunities that align with these visions. This practice helps reprogram your RAS to filter information in a way that enhances your awareness of elements that support your goals and aspirations. Through consistent visualization, you can influence your perception of reality and prime your mind to notice and act upon opportunities that lead to the realization of your desired outcomes.
  • The "five-second rule" mentioned by Mel Robbins is a technique where you interrupt negative thoughts by counting down from five to one. This countdown helps create a moment of pause between the negative thought and your reaction, allowing you to regain control over your mindset. By using this rule, you can prevent yourself from spiraling into negative thinking patterns and instead redirect your focus towards more positive thoughts and actions. This technique ...

Counterarguments

  • The RAS's role in shaping reality is complex and not fully understood; it may not be as directly controllable as suggested.
  • Visualization techniques, while beneficial for some, may not work for everyone and could lead to frustration if expected outcomes are not achieved.
  • The idea that we can simply reprogram our RAS through visualization might oversimplify the complexities of the human brain and individual psychological differences.
  • The effectiveness of the "five second rule" and other quick-fix strategies may vary greatly among individuals and could be less effective for those with certain mental health conditions.
  • Physical gestures like the high-five habit might not be universally effective in disrupting negative self-talk, especially in the absence of a broader therapeutic approach.
  • Personifying negative thoughts could potentially reinf ...

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Achieve 70% MORE SUCCESS: 3 Visualization HACKS to Boost Your CONFIDENCE

Living with Presence, Purpose, and Intention

In the quest for personal and professional growth, Ed Mylett, Tony Robbins, and Matthew McConaughey share insights on living with greater mindfulness, purpose, and intention.

Cultivating mindfulness and being fully present in the moment

Recognizing the tendency to focus on the future at the expense of the present

Mylett acknowledges his own past struggles with being in the present. Before he got married, he was always oriented toward the future, a mindset that, while beneficial for innovation, caused him to miss out on the now. Similarly, McConaughey shares an episode during a trip where his focus on the destination prevented him from truly experiencing the present, such as when he witnessed an extraordinary sight of butterflies. Both emphasize the importance of balancing future aspirations with present experiences.

Developing strategies to be fully engaged in the host and now

Mylett advocates for specific strategies to foster present engagement, like turning off his phone after arriving home and taking a moment to transition before connecting with his family. Similarly, Robbins suggests that starting the day with a routine that sets intentions can help maintain a present and engaged mindset throughout the day. This focus on the immediate moments of life, seeing them as "dots on the map" in Robbins’s metaphor, can enrich the journey itself.

Aligning one's actions with a clear sense of purpose and intention

Identifying core values and life priorities to guide decision-making

McConaughey urges individuals to double down on what already provides meaning and value in their lives, suggesting that aligning one's career with innate talents and societal needs creates a "sweet spot." This alignment allows for both personal fulfillment and the ability to meet life's essential demands—a foundational step in waking up with a sense of purpose. He discusses the importance of staying true to personal values and priorities when making decisions, ensuring care for himself, his family, and his spirituality.

Committing to serving ...

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Living with Presence, Purpose, and Intention

Additional Materials

Clarifications

  • Ed Mylett, Tony Robbins, and Matthew McConaughey share insights on living mindfully, purposefully, and intentionally. Mylett discusses strategies for being present, like disconnecting from technology. Robbins emphasizes starting the day with intentions to stay engaged. McConaughey focuses on aligning actions with personal values and making a positive impact on others.
  • Mylett advocates for strategies like disconnecting from technology upon arriving home and taking a moment to transition before engaging with family. Robbins suggests starting the day with a routine that sets intentions to maintain a present and engaged mindset throughout the day. Both emphasize the importance of consciously structuring moments to be fully present and engaged in the now.
  • McConaughey's concept of aligning one's career with innate talents and societal needs involves finding a balance between what you are naturally good at (innate talents) and what the world requires or values (societal needs). By aligning these aspects, individuals can create a fulfilling career that not only leverages their strengths but also contributes positively to society. This alignment allows for a meaningful and sustainable ...

Counterarguments

  • While being present is important, excessive focus on the present without considering future consequences can lead to short-sighted decisions.
  • Strategies for mindfulness, such as turning off phones, may not be feasible for everyone, especially those whose jobs or family responsibilities require constant availability.
  • Setting intentions at the start of the day is a beneficial practice, but it may not account for the unpredictable nature of life that can disrupt even the best-laid plans.
  • The idea of finding a "sweet spot" where personal talents meet societal needs is idealistic and may not be attainable for everyone due to various socioeconomic barriers.
  • Emphasizing the importance of aligning actions with the intention to help others might inadvertently create pressure to always act altruistically, which can be unsustainable and lead to burnout.
  • The concept of making a positive impact can be subjective and varies greatly depending on cultural, social, and pers ...

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Achieve 70% MORE SUCCESS: 3 Visualization HACKS to Boost Your CONFIDENCE

Shedding Identities to Connect with One's Core Self

As Matthew McConaughey and Ed Mylett share their thoughts and experiences, it becomes clear that shedding constructed identities can lead to a profound connection with one's core self.

Stripping away external labels and roles to access one's essential nature

Matthew McConaughey recounts a pivotal journey in his life where he removed personal talismans that represented aspects of his identity, such as his father's ring and his American cap. He questioned who he was before these external markers and titles defined him. This process of identity stripping led to his realization that beyond the external accolades and possessions, he is fundamentally a human being, a mammal, and as a believer, a child of God.

Similarly, Ed Mylett describes reaching a point in his life where he no longer feels compelled to prove his happiness or worth to others. He reflects on experiencing persistent self-doubt despite external perceptions of his success. Accepting these feelings as a part of the human experience helped him connect to a more authentic self.

Moreover, Mylett shares a profound moment where he felt truly loved by his father for the first time, an unconditional love that extended beyond his successes. This acknowledgment helped him realize that his identity went far deeper than his accomplishments.

Embracing paradox and seeing the truth in overlapping perspectives

Matthew McConaughey speaks to the concept of embracing paradox, suggesting that truth lies in the overlap of contrasting ideas and perspectives, a place he refers to as the "third eye." He advocates for understanding and accepting that multiple, seemingly contradictory truths can exist simultaneously. McConaughey emphasizes the value of understand ...

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Shedding Identities to Connect with One's Core Self

Additional Materials

Clarifications

  • Talismans representing aspects of identity are objects or symbols that hold personal significance and are often used to express or reinforce one's sense of self. These items can range from jewelry to clothing to other possessions that carry emotional or cultural meaning, reflecting aspects of a person's identity or beliefs. By removing these talismans, individuals may explore their core identity beyond the external markers that shape how they perceive themselves and are perceived by others. This process can lead to a deeper understanding of one's true essence and values.
  • The concept of the "third eye" typically symbolizes inner vision, intuition, and spiritual insight in various cultures and belief systems. It represents a higher state of consciousness beyond physical sight, allowing individuals to perceive truths beyond the ordinary senses. This metaphorical eye is associated with clarity, wisdom, and the ability to see beyond the surface of things. In essence, it signifies a deeper understanding of reality and oneself through a more profound level of perception.
  • Embracing paradox involves accepting that seemingly contradictory ideas can coexist and hold elements of truth. It requires seeing beyond binary thinking and acknowledging the complexity of overlapping perspectives. This approach encourages a deeper understanding of nuan ...

Counterarguments

  • While shedding constructed identities can be liberating, it can also lead to a sense of loss or confusion as individuals struggle to redefine themselves without familiar markers.
  • Some psychological theories argue that external markers and titles are integral to forming a stable identity, and their complete removal might not be necessary or beneficial for everyone.
  • Embracing self-doubt can be a double-edged sword; while it may lead to authenticity, it can also hinder personal growth and confidence if not managed properly.
  • The idea that unconditional love from others is necessary to realize a deeper identity could be seen as dependent on external validation, which contradicts the emphasis on finding an internal core self.
  • Embracing paradox and overlapping perspectives might sometimes lead to indecision or a lack of commitment to one's values and beliefs.
  • The concept of multiple contradictory truths coexisting can be challenging when it comes to moral or ethical dilemmas whe ...

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