In this episode of The Mel Robbins Podcast, guest Mon Rovîa shares his experiences of surviving the Liberian Civil War, being rescued by missionaries, and adapting to life in the United States. As a child who witnessed the impacts of war and was separated from his siblings, Mon describes his journey of processing survivor's guilt, depression, and questions about his identity while growing up in a new environment.
The conversation explores how Mon found healing through music, developing his unique "Afro-Appalachian" style that combines his West African heritage with Appalachian influences. Mon discusses how journaling and songwriting helped him work through complex emotions, and how his music has become a platform for building community and encouraging others to embrace their own experiences and talents.
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Mon Rovîa's story begins in the chaos of the Liberian Civil War, where he witnessed his brothers being forced into child soldiering between ages five and ten. The experience left him with deep emotional scars, including questions about whether he was conceived during wartime violence.
Rescued by missionaries and brought to the United States, Mon faced the challenge of adapting to a completely new environment. The transition left him silent for an extended period, as he struggled with questions of identity and belonging in his adopted white family. Despite these challenges, Mon eventually came to accept his rescue as a destined opportunity.
In his new American life, Mon describes himself as watchful and quiet, constantly trying to understand how to fit into his middle-class private school environment. He grappled with intense survivor's guilt, questioning why he was rescued while his siblings remained in the war zone. This internal conflict led to severe depression during his college years, as he felt unworthy of his opportunities and avoided confronting his background.
Mon discovered solace in journaling and songwriting, which became crucial outlets for processing his complex emotions. Though initially hesitant to pursue music due to self-doubt, support from friends and mentors, particularly his manager Eric, helped Mon embrace his musical gifts and share them more widely.
Mon's unique "Afro-Appalachian" style blends his West African heritage with Appalachian influences, creating peaceful spaces for listeners to reflect on life and identity. His music has evolved into a platform for healing and community building, with listeners incorporating his songs into their daily routines. Mon emphasizes the importance of supportive communities and uses his music to highlight his people's history while encouraging others to discover and share their own gifts.
1-Page Summary
The article details Mon Rovîa's traumatic early life amid the Liberian civil war and the subsequent challenges he faced as a refugee in the United States.
Mon Rovîa was born into the violence and chaos of the Liberian Civil War. He witnessed unfathomable brutality at a young age, including his own siblings’ involvement in the conflict. His brothers, Saturday and Emmanuel, were forced into child soldiering between the ages of five and ten. Liberia was torn apart by a dictator’s coup, which recruited child soldiers and led to complete lawlessness, with armed children dominating adults.
Mon also harbored deep emotional scars, pondering from a young age whether he was conceived from sexual violence during the war, a harrowing possibility that hung over him.
Mon was taken from his homeland to live with a missionary family during the war, eventually moving with them to the United States. The transition was disorienting as Mon was uprooted from his land, language, and the familiar environment of his upbringing. This abrupt change rendered Mon silent for a long period, prompting his adopted family to worry about his well-being.
Ripped away from his family and his country, Mon felt an enduring emotional 'weight.' Arriving in a new country, Mon didn't recognize his adopted family. The cultural differenc ...
Mon Rovîa's Life and Experiences in Liberia
Mon Rovîa shares an intimate reflection on his experience of moving to the US as a child, grappling with feelings of alienation, survivors' guilt, and the internal conflict of finding a place in a world where he felt he didn't entirely belong.
Mon Rovîa describes himself as a shy and quiet person, particularly during his early years in America. Through his youth, having experienced much at a young age, he was "watchful," constantly trying to understand his new environment, figure out how to fit in, and integrate into his white household and the middle-class space of a private school.
Mon reveals the deep survivor's guilt that tormented him, as he questioned why he was the one rescued while his siblings remained in the war zone. He internalized his suffering, feeling undeserving of his opportunities in America, and thought that perhaps his siblings would have utilized them better. Their absence also led him to ponder about the family traits he may have inherited but never had the chance to recognize in himself.
Mon Rovîa struggled with the truth of his feelings regarding his mother and the heritage he carries. This self-imposed guilt led him to downplay the importance of his own life, hoping to separate himself from his past in Liberia and to just be American. In college, this struggle culminated in a severe depression where he felt directionless and unworthy, especially considering the lives lost in his homeland.
He felt responsible for the plight of his siblings, who stayed behind, consumed by the idea that they might have accomplished more significant things than him had they been given the same chance. He avoided pondering his background and the circumstances around his birth because it stirred ...
Mon's Struggle With Identity, Belonging, and Guilt After Moving To Us
Mon Rovîa articulates a personal journey of healing and self-discovery through the transformative power of music and songwriting.
Discovering music as a means to channel his emotions, Mon Rovîa speaks to the potency of journaling and songwriting in his quest for self-expression.
For Mon, music became an indispensable outlet for his emotions—a journal where he could be candid. He describes how journaling was his initial safe space, where it could be just him and his thoughts. Over time, journaling transformed into songwriting, where his reflective thoughts and personal musings found a melodic flow, morphing into the lyrics of songs that spoke of identity, history, and truth in ways that verbal communication could not.
Despite recognizing his talent in writing and music, Mon grappled with self-doubt and a hesitation to step into the spotlight, unsure if his contributions would be accepted, particularly in genres that he felt might not welcome him due to his race.
Mon credits the support of friends and mentors for helping him embrace his gif ...
Mon's Journey of Healing and Purpose Through Music
Mon Rovîa embodies the essence of peace and healing through his music, providing a reflective space for his listeners, fostering community, and affirming self-worth.
Mon Rovîa aims for his music to alleviate anxiety, allowing listeners to reflect on their importance and sink into self-contemplation. He hopes his peaceful tunes provide a space for quiet and intimacy, in a world he describes as fast-moving and loud. Mon shares that people have integrated his music into their daily life, listening while at work or during their morning routines, and the community around his music has grown from there. His melodies connect on an emotional level, resonating with experiences of sadness, pain, love, and loss.
Mon Rovîa's music, described as "Afro-Appalachian," merges his West African heritage from Liberia with Appalachian culture. This unique sound is central to his identity, contributing to his mission to keep himself and his listeners grounded. It honors his roots and offers a diverse soundscape that provides a backdrop for an exploration of life and identity.
Music is a healing force for Mon, as it helps him reconcile feelings about his mother and his origins. He encourages listeners to make choices that lead toward happiness, underscored in his song "Crook of the Road," which emphasizes accepting help. Mel Robbins, mentioning Mon Rovîa's music, suggests that his presence, such as at Boston Calling, signifies a gathering space for all, indicating a sense of community evoked by his art.
Mon underscores the importance of healing together, as many suffer in isolation—even when surrounded by people. He values the creation of a community through his music, acknowledging the importance of having a support system to continue doing good work. He believes that those who adopt should not let children grow without understanding their roots, implying a strong sense of ide ...
Healing, Peace, and Community in Mon's Music and Message
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