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5 Ways to Actually Make Your Habits Stick

By Stitcher

In this episode of the Mel Robbins Podcast, Mel Robbins shares insights on habit formation and how to make new habits stick. She explains the science behind habits and the power of replacing old patterns with new behaviors. Robbins offers practical strategies to make habits more visible and remove obstacles, like creating environmental cues and limiting access to temptations.

The episode also highlights the importance of tracking progress and planning for potential hurdles when adopting new habits. Robbins emphasizes that mornings are an opportune time to establish routines, as willpower and focus tend to be highest early in the day. With her straightforward approach, this episode equips listeners with actionable techniques for developing and sustaining positive habits.

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5 Ways to Actually Make Your Habits Stick

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5 Ways to Actually Make Your Habits Stick

1-Page Summary

The Science and Psychology of Habit Formation

According to Mel Robbins, an expert in habit formation, habits are learnable, repeatable patterns shaped by repetition. Robbins shares insights into developing new habits and interrupting existing ones.

To Break Habits, Interrupt and Replace the Pattern

Robbins explains that skipping a day doesn't negate progress when forming a new habit. To break an existing habit, she suggests interrupting the pattern physically and replacing it with a new behavior. Habits shape our identity, so adopting new patterns can transform our lives.

Strategies For Making New Habits Visible and Obvious

Creating environmental reminders, Robbins says, helps transition habits from mental intentions to visible cues. Examples include Post-it notes, laying out clothes the night before, and keeping healthy snacks within reach. Making habits visible reduces decision fatigue and activation energy.

Techniques For Removing Obstacles To New Habits

Robbins and others discuss strategies like limiting access to unhealthy snacks and alcohol to cut cravings. Storing these items out of sight makes indulging more difficult. Limiting phone use, especially in the morning, prevents unproductive habits.

Importance Of Tracking Progress and Planning New Habits

Mel Robbins stresses tracking progress visually (e.g. calendar marks, apps) to stay motivated and accountable. She also highlights planning and scenario preparation, like bringing a dish to a dinner party, to increase success when adopting new habits.

Benefits of New Morning Habits

According to Robbins, mornings are optimal for willpower and focus, making it ideal for establishing productive habits. Consistent morning routines create positive momentum. She recommends maximizing this peak period by preparing the night before and removing bedroom distractions like phones.

1-Page Summary

Additional Materials

Counterarguments

  • While habits are often shaped by repetition, some argue that the quality and intentionality of the action can be as important as frequency.
  • Some research suggests that consistency is key in habit formation, and skipping days may sometimes undermine the establishment of a new habit for some individuals.
  • The idea of physically interrupting a habit pattern may not address deeper psychological or emotional drivers of certain behaviors.
  • The transformation of one's life through new habits can be overstated without considering other factors like environment, genetics, and personal circumstances.
  • Environmental reminders can be helpful, but they may also become part of the background and lose their effectiveness over time if not varied or updated.
  • The strategy of making habits visible might not be suitable for people who find too many visual cues overwhelming or distracting.
  • Limiting access to unhealthy snacks and alcohol doesn't address the root causes of cravings and might not be a sustainable long-term strategy for everyone.
  • Storing tempting items out of sight might not be effective for individuals who struggle with impulse control or have a high level of determination to access these items.
  • Limiting phone use in the morning may not be practical or beneficial for everyone, especially those whose work or personal life requires early connectivity.
  • Tracking progress visually can be motivating, but for some, it may lead to an unhealthy focus on metrics or feelings of failure when progress isn't linear.
  • Planning and scenario preparation can be helpful, but over-planning can also lead to rigidity and stress when situations don't go as planned.
  • While mornings might be optimal for some for willpower and focus, this is not universal; some people may find other times of day more suitable for productive habits.
  • The recommendation to remove phones from the bedroom to maximize morning productivity may not consider the needs of individuals who use their phones for important morning routines like meditation apps or alarm functions.

Actionables

  • Transform your phone's lock screen into a habit tracker by setting a new wallpaper each day you succeed in a habit, creating a visual chain of success. This builds on the idea of tracking progress visually but uses an item you interact with frequently, ensuring constant reinforcement of your commitment.
  • Designate a "habit corner" in your home where you place objects related to your new habits, such as a yoga mat for daily exercise or a journal for reflection. This dedicated space serves as a physical and mental trigger to engage in the habit, leveraging the concept of environmental reminders in a focused, personal area.
  • Create a morning "launch sequence" by writing down a three-step process that you follow immediately after waking up, such as drinking water, stretching, and reading a motivational quote. This simple routine primes your brain for productivity and taps into the morning peak period without requiring significant preparation or willpower.

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5 Ways to Actually Make Your Habits Stick

The Science and Psychology of Habit Formation

Mel Robbins, an expert in habit formation, delves into the mechanics of how habits shape our daily lives and identities.

Habits: Learnable, Repeatable Behavior Patterns

Mel Robbins discusses habits as patterns that form through repetition, underscoring that our minds and bodies are primed to learn these patterns. Robbins shares insights into the process by which humans develop new habits, suggesting that habits are a skill anyone can learn through what they repeatedly do. This idea that habits are learnable and repeatable highlights the potential each person has to cultivate desired behaviors over time.

To Break Habits, Interrupt and Replace the Pattern

Robbins touches on the challenges and misconceptions around breaking habits. She explains that while undertaking a 75-day mental toughness challenge, she learned that skipping a day in the routine does not negate all the progress made. This is supported by habit research showing that new neuropathways created when starting a new habit are retained, even if a lapse occurs.

Habits Shape Identity - New Habits Shape You

Robbins emphasizes that habits are an integral part of our identity. The patterns we create through our repeated actions define who we are. For instance, Robbins describes her own habit of hitting the snooze button and how it formed part of her identity as someone who procrastinates in the morning. Changing this habit can transform not only the action but also the aspect of one’s identity that is tied to ...

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The Science and Psychology of Habit Formation

Additional Materials

Counterarguments

  • While habits are patterns formed through repetition, some argue that the complexity of human behavior means that not all habits are formed or changed purely through repetition; emotional, environmental, and cognitive factors also play significant roles.
  • The idea that minds and bodies are primed to learn patterns does not account for individual differences in learning abilities or the impact of neurological conditions that may affect habit formation.
  • The assertion that habits are a skill anyone can learn may overlook the challenges faced by individuals with mental health issues or cognitive impairments that make habit formation more difficult.
  • The concept of breaking habits by interrupting and replacing the pattern may be overly simplistic, as some habits, especially addictive behaviors, may require more comprehensive interventions.
  • The notion that skipping a day in a routine does not negate all progress might not apply to all types of habits or routines, particularly those that require consistent practice, like learning a musical instrument or a language.
  • The idea that new neuropathways are retained even after a lapse does not consider the potential for old pathways to be strengthened if the lapse leads to a return to old habits.
  • While habits are an integral part of our identity, this perspective may underemphasize the role of conscious choice and moral responsibility in shaping who we are.
  • The view that changing habits can transform both actions and identity might not fully acknowledge the complexity of identity, which is influenced by many factors beyond individual habits.
  • The suggestion that setbacks do not ruin overall progress in habit formation may not resonate with everyone, as some individuals may experience significant discouragement or loss of motivati ...

Actionables

  • You can use a habit tracking app to monitor your progress and identify patterns in your behavior. By inputting your daily activities, you'll be able to see which habits stick and which ones falter, giving you insight into how your identity is shaped by these routines. For example, if you're trying to drink more water, the app could remind you at regular intervals and track your intake, reinforcing the habit through repetition.
  • Create a 'habit interruption' card deck with various activities that can break your current pattern and introduce a new one. Each card could have a simple, quick task like 'do 10 jumping jacks' or 'write down three things you're grateful for'. When you feel the urge to engage in an old habit, pull out a card and do the activity to create a mental and physical interruption.
  • Start a small social group, either online or ...

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5 Ways to Actually Make Your Habits Stick

Strategies For Making New Habits Visible and Obvious

Making new habits stick involves transitioning them from mental intentions to visible, actionable patterns. Mel Robbins and the host discuss effective strategies for creating environmental reminders that transform your desired behaviors into undeniable physical cues.

Use Environmental Reminders to Aid Habit Formation

Creating systems, triggers, cues, or structures outside oneself is essential for habit formation. By placing a habit in your external environment, what Robbins refers to as moving the habit from an "innie" to an "outie," you signal your new behavior more effectively. Thus, the successful change of habits relies on making these cues visible and external—not just keeping them in your mind.

Examples Of Making Habits More Visible

Effective strategies include taping a list of things to accomplish to your bathroom mirror so it's the first and last thing you see each day, laying out clothes on the floor the night before, and stocking the fridge with healthy choices instead of alcohol. Similarly, placing a water bottle and a book near the coffee maker can serve as a reminder to hydrate and read instead of immediately turning to your phone in the morning. These visible cues are instrumental in setting you up for success.

Visible Habits Reduce Decision Fatigue and Activation Energy

By making behavioral cues visible, such as with Post-it notes on a mirror or pre-scheduled reminders on ...

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Strategies For Making New Habits Visible and Obvious

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Clarifications

  • Activation energy is the energy required to start a chemical reaction. It acts as a barrier that reactants must overcome for the reaction to occur. Higher activation energy means a slower reaction rate, while lower activation energy speeds up ...

Counterarguments

  • External cues may not be sufficient for everyone; internal motivation is also a critical factor in habit formation.
  • Over-reliance on environmental reminders might hinder the development of self-discipline and intrinsic motivation.
  • Some individuals may find too many visible cues to be clutter or noise, which could lead to increased stress or overwhelm.
  • Habit formation is a complex process that can require more than just environmental changes, such as addressing underlying psychological barriers.
  • Visible cues might lose their effectiveness over time as individuals become habituated to them, reducing their impact.
  • Decision fatigue can sometimes be caused by an overabundance of cues and reminders, leading to the opposite effect intended.
  • Not all habits are easily translated into physical or visible cues, especially those that are more abstract or involve complex behaviors.
  • Some people may find digital ...

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5 Ways to Actually Make Your Habits Stick

Techniques For Removing Obstacles To New Habits

Creating new habits can be challenging, but certain techniques can help remove obstacles. From limiting unhealthy triggers to avoiding unproductive distractions, Mel and other hosts discuss strategies for habit formation.

Eliminating Triggers Eases New Habit Formation

Limiting Unhealthy Snacks or Alcohol Cuts Default Cravings

Mel shares that her 75-day challenge helped her form new habits by eliminating certain triggers. By not consuming alcohol and avoiding gluten or dairy products, she tackled common cravings that often lead to unhealthy snack consumption. The host describes how replacing beer and wine with alternatives like kombucha or non-alcoholic beer in their beverage fridge helped them steer clear of alcohol. Furthermore, the host suggests putting alcohol away, off the countertop, and into a cupboard or better yet, the basement to make it more difficult to give in to the temptation of drinking.

Limiting Distractions to Form New Habits

Limit Phone Use to Avoid Unproductive Habits

When it comes to forming new habits, limiting distractions i ...

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Techniques For Removing Obstacles To New Habits

Additional Materials

Counterarguments

  • While eliminating triggers can be helpful, it's not always practical or sustainable to completely remove certain items like alcohol or snacks from one's environment, and doing so may not address the underlying reasons for the cravings.
  • Complete avoidance of certain foods or drinks, such as gluten or dairy, may not be necessary for everyone and could lead to an unnecessarily restrictive diet.
  • Replacing alcoholic beverages with non-alcoholic alternatives like kombucha might not work for everyone, as some individuals may not enjoy these alternatives or may find them triggering.
  • Putting alcohol out of sight might not be a sufficient deterrent for some individuals, and it could also inconvenience others who do not struggle with alcohol consumption.
  • Limiting phone use is beneficial, but it's important to recognize that smartphones can also be tools for productivity and positive habits, such as learning new skills or tr ...

Actionables

  • You can create a visual progress chart to track days without default cravings, using stickers or markers to represent successful habit-forming days. This tangible form of tracking can serve as a motivational tool and a visual reminder of your progress. For example, place a gold star on a calendar for each day you avoid unhealthy snacks or alcohol, creating a chain of success that you'll want to keep unbroken.
  • Develop a new morning routine that includes a short walk or meditation before touching any electronic devices. This helps establish a healthy habit that prioritizes personal well-being over immediate gratification from phone use. For instance, instead of reaching for your phone upon waking, commit to a 10-minute walk outside or a meditation session to start your day with clarity and purpose.
  • Experiment with creative cooking challenges that focus on making meals without ...

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5 Ways to Actually Make Your Habits Stick

Importance Of Tracking Progress and Planning New Habits

Mel Robbins emphasizes the significance of tracking progress and careful planning when trying to implement new habits, both to increase success rates and to stay on course.

Tracking Habits Visually or With an App Keeps You Accountable and Motivated

Robbins insists on the necessity of using systems to keep track of progress, advocating the use of visual means or apps for accountability and motivation. She stresses the importance of getting the tracking system out of your head and instead using a tangible method, such as her daughter's use of a grid on the wall with post-it notes, each representing a day of her 75 Hard challenge. Robbins underlines the psychological benefit of physically marking progress, as the action of removing a post-it note serves as a visual cue of achievement and helps to prevent loss of momentum.

Calendar Marks or Progress Trackers Prevent Momentum Loss

Robbins further notes that seeing streaks visually and not breaking the chain of progress through the use of calendar marks or progress trackers is a powerful motivation tool. This external tracking helps individuals maintain their course and recover quickly if they veer off, as it clearly displays both their advancements and setbacks. She advises listeners to monitor their progress seriously, suggesting using paper or an app to track it, which can assist in avoiding discouragement. She also relates the requirement of taking a progress photo every day as part of her mental toughness challenge to highlight the use of visual cues in tracking.

Planning and Scenarios for New Habits Increase Success

Beyond tracking, Robbins discusses the critical role of planning in behavior change. She states that not planning ahead is tantamount to planning to fail and underscores the need for detailed preparation, such as planning meals and grocery shopping to facilitate healthy eating habits. Robbins cites her experience with avoiding dairy and gluten, mentioning the necessity of meticulous planning and bringing up creating decisions the night before to prepare for the upcoming day.

H ...

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Importance Of Tracking Progress and Planning New Habits

Additional Materials

Counterarguments

  • Tracking habits with apps or visually may not work for everyone; some individuals may find these methods cumbersome or anxiety-inducing, leading to demotivation.
  • Overemphasis on tracking can lead to an unhealthy obsession with progress, potentially overshadowing the intrinsic value of the habits themselves.
  • Visual cues and progress trackers might not be sufficient for individuals who struggle with deeper motivational issues or psychological barriers to habit formation.
  • Planning for new habits can sometimes be too rigid, leaving little room for spontaneity or necessary adjustments based on real-life situations.
  • If-then planning, while useful, may not account for the complexity and unpredictability of certain situations, which could lead to failure and discouragement.
  • The focus on detailed planning might overwhelm some individuals, causing them to procr ...

Actionables

  • Create a habit-adoption story on social media where you post daily updates about your new habit, turning your followers into a support and accountability group. By sharing your journey, you not only keep yourself accountable but also inspire others. For instance, if you're trying to drink more water, post a picture of your filled water bottle each morning and update when you've finished it.
  • Design a personal reward system where you treat yourself to something enjoyable after reaching a habit milestone. This could be as simple as watching an episode of your favorite show after a week of consistent exercise or buying a small gift for yourself after a month of healthy eating. The key is to choose rewards that don't counteract the habit you're trying to establish.
  • Par ...

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5 Ways to Actually Make Your Habits Stick

Benefits of New Morning Habits

Starting the day with intention through a robust morning routine can be transformative, offering both immediate and long-term benefits to personal productivity and wellbeing.

Morning Is Optimal for Willpower, Focus, Speed to Tackle New Habits

Your natural circadian rhythm plays a major role in dictating your mental sharpness and willpower. In the morning, particularly within the first four hours after waking, your speed of processing information and your ability to focus are at their highest. This makes the mornings an optimal time to address tasks that require significant mental engagement and to establish new, productive habits.

Maximize Morning Peak for Key Task Completion

Robbins suggests that by aligning with your body’s natural tendencies, you can maximize your morning peak to complete key tasks. Prepping the night before—such as laying out exercise clothing—means taking advantage of this high-energy period. During these early hours, you are well-placed to read that post-it note on the mirror, drink the bottle of water you left out for yourself, write in your journal or engage in exercise with the gear you have readily prepared.

Consistent Morning Routine Creates Positive Daily Momentum

By establishing a consistent morning routine, you tap into a wellspring of daily momentum. Your morning routine isn’t just about getting things done; it’s about setting your day’s tone, enabling a cascade of other positive habits to unfold. Forming these habits can be aided by small tweaks like exercising in the prepped tights or following through on the reminders ...

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Benefits of New Morning Habits

Additional Materials

Clarifications

  • The circadian rhythm is the body's internal clock that regulates various biological processes over a roughly 24-hour cycle. It influences factors like sleep-wake patterns, hormone release, and body temperature. Mental sharpness and willpower tend to be highest during specific times of the day, often aligning with the peak of the circadian rhythm, which can vary among individuals. This alignment can impact cognitive functions, such as focus and decision-making abilities.
  • Maximizing the morning peak for completing key tasks involves leveraging the peak mental sharpness and focus typically experienced within the first few hours after waking up. This time frame is ideal for tackling tasks that require significant mental engagement and establishing new productive habits. By aligning with your body's natural tendencies and preparing in advance, you can make the most of this high-energy period to accomplish important tasks efficiently and effectively. This strategy aims to capitalize on the optimal cognitive state in the morning to boost productivity and set a positive tone for the rest of the day.
  • Preparing the night before involves setting up things like laying out exercise clothing or writing reminders to leverage the high energy and mental clarity typically experienced in the morning. This proactive approach helps streamline your morning routine and allows you to focus on important tasks without the added stress of last-minute preparations. By organizing and planning ahead, you can make the most of your peak morning hours and kickstart your day with efficiency and purpose. This strategy optimizes your productivity by reducing decision-making and increasing the likelihood of following through on your intended habits and tasks.
  • Establishing a consistent morning routine involves performing a set of activities in the same order each morning. This routine helps create a sense of structure and predictability at the start of the day. By following the same sequence of actions daily, you can build momentum and set a positive tone for the rest of the day. Consistency in morning habits can lead to increased productivity, improved focus, and a more organized mindset throughout the day.
  • Small tweaks aiding in forming habits involve making minor adjustments to your daily routine or environment to facilitate the development of new behaviors. These adjustments can include simple actions like laying out exercise clothing the night before or setting reminders for yourself. By implementing these small changes consistently, you can create a supportive framework that makes it easier to adopt and maintain positive habits over time. These tweaks serve to stream ...

Actionables

  • Design a 'wake-up playlist' with songs that progressively increase in tempo to naturally boost your alertness and energy levels in the morning. Start with slower, calming tunes and build up to more upbeat tracks that align with the time you want to be at your peak productivity. This can help you ease into your morning routine and ensure you're fully awake and energized when it's time to focus on your most important tasks.
  • Create a 'morning pages' journal where you write three pages of stream-of-consciousness thoughts as soon as you wake up. This practice can clear your mind and help you identify your intentions for the day, which can be particularly effective during the first four hours of mental sharpness. It's a simple way to declutter your thoughts and focus on what you want to achieve each day.
  • Develop a 'habit stacking' method by linking ...

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