Start Strong: Do This Every Morning to Get Out of Bed, Beat Anxiety, and Feel Incredible All Day
In this episode of The Mel Robbins Podcast, Robbins candidly shares her long-standing struggle with waking up overwhelmed by a sense of dread and heaviness, a feeling she likens to being weighed down by a "gravity blanket." Through therapy, she uncovers the childhood trauma at the root of this physical manifestation.
Her therapist, Ann Davin, introduces the "slithering" technique—a way of processing trauma by moving slowly with, rather than fighting against, the heaviness. Listeners gain insight into how unresolved childhood experiences can surface as lasting bodily sensations, and learn a unique coping method to gently address and release stored trauma over time.
This is a preview of the Shortform summary of the Oct 21, 2024 episode of the The Mel Robbins Podcast
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1-Page Summary
Mel's Morning Dread and Heaviness
Mel Robbins shares her long-standing struggle with waking up overwhelmed by dread and heaviness, describing the sensation as a "gravity blanket" weighing her down. Attempting to push through with willpower alone has been ineffective, she says.
Tracing Mel's Morning Dread to Childhood Trauma
In therapy, Robbins discovers the root of her morning dread: a disturbing sexual experience in fourth grade that left her feeling ashamed and like she had done something wrong. As her therapist Ann Davin explains, unresolved trauma from childhood can manifest as lasting bodily sensations and patterns like Mel's morning heaviness.
The "Slithering" Technique to Process Trauma
Davin teaches Robbins the "slithering" technique to address her dread. Rather than fighting the sensation, Robbins slithers out of bed slowly, letting her body move with the heaviness. She rolls and crawls on the floor, allowing her body to process and release the stored trauma.
Practicing the Slithering Technique
To slither, Robbins slides out of bed, rolls onto the floor, writhes to break up the heaviness, and crawls toward the bathroom, moving with the sensations instead of against them. Davin advises that slithering can be adapted for individual needs and even practiced with children to reinforce this tool for processing negative experiences over time.
1-Page Summary
Additional Materials
Counterarguments
- The effectiveness of the "slithering" technique is subjective and may not be evidence-based; it might not work for everyone, and suggesting it as a universal solution could be misleading.
- While personal anecdotes like Mel Robbins' can be powerful, they do not replace the need for empirical research to validate the effectiveness of therapeutic techniques.
- The connection between childhood trauma and adult sensations like morning dread is complex and may not be as direct as implied; other factors could also contribute to such feelings.
- The description of the "slithering" technique lacks detail on how it specifically aids in processing trauma, and there may be a risk of oversimplifying the process of dealing with complex trauma.
- The recommendation to practice the slithering technique with children should be approached with caution, as children's responses to trauma and their coping mechanisms can be very different from adults and should be guided by child psychology experts.
- The narrative could inadvertently stigmatize those who struggle with morning dread but do not have a history of trauma, suggesting that their experiences are less valid or that they are missing a crucial element of understanding.
- The text does not address the potential need for ongoing professional support or other forms of therapy in conjunction with techniques like slithering, which could be essential for some individuals' recovery.
- The idea that willpower alone is ineffective may be challenged by those who believe in the power of self-discipline and mindset changes as tools for overcoming psychological barriers.
Actionables
- Start your day with a personalized movement ritual to counteract morning heaviness by choosing a series of gentle stretches or yoga poses that resonate with your body's needs. For example, if you feel tension in your shoulders upon waking, incorporate shoulder rolls and side stretches into your morning routine to physically address the discomfort and promote a sense of release.
- Create a morning affirmation practice that involves speaking positively to your body, acknowledging the sensations you feel, and giving yourself permission to move through them at your own pace. You might say things like "I am aware of the weight I feel, and I choose to move through it with grace," as you gradually get out of bed and start your day.
- Develop a 'morning mood journal' where you track your physical and emotional state each day upon waking. Use this to identify patterns or triggers that may contribute to your morning dread, and experiment with different bedtime routines the night before to see if they influence your morning state. For instance, you might try reading a calming book, meditating, or listening to soothing music before sleep to see if these activities result in a lighter feeling in the morning.
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Mel's personal struggles with getting out of bed and negative morning routines
Mel Robbins reveals her personal struggle with waking up to feelings of dread and how willpower alone has been ineffective in overcoming these morning blues.
Mel's long-standing difficulty waking up and feeling dread or heaviness upon waking
Mel Robbins shares a vivid description of her mornings, which involve an overwhelming sense of dread that's been a constant in her life, unrelated to her circumstances. This dread acts like a "gravity blanket," creating an intense desire to stay in bed. She likens the sensation to having a heavy weight standing on her chest, making the bed feel like a magnet to which she is inexorably stuck. The enormity of this feeling, Mel explains, is such that getting out of bed feels like resistance training or pushing through something Herculean.
Mel's attempt to force herself out of bed through willpower alone is ineffective
Mel describes routine wake-ups that involve battling with feelings of heaviness, negativity, and overwhelm. Despite attempting to muster the willpower to push through the dread, ...
Here’s what you’ll find in our full summary
Mel's personal struggles with getting out of bed and negative morning routines
Additional Materials
Counterarguments
- While Mel Robbins' feelings are valid, it's possible that her approach of relying solely on willpower might not be the most effective strategy for everyone. Other methods, such as establishing a morning routine, seeking professional help, or practicing mindfulness, could potentially offer more sustainable solutions.
- The description of the feelings of dread as constant and unrelated to circumstances might not account for subconscious stressors or unresolved issues that could be contributing to these feelings. It might be beneficial to explore if there are underlying factors that need to be addressed.
- The metaphor of a "gravity blanket" and feeling magnetically stuck to the bed could be seen as an oversimplification of what might be a more complex psychological or physiological issue, such as depression or sleep disorders, which might require medical attention or therapy.
- The idea that getting out of bed feels like a Herculean task could be challenged by suggesting that incremental steps and positive reinforcement might help in reducing the enormity of the task perceived by Mel.
- The persistence of dread des ...
Actionables
- You can create a morning playlist with energetic or motivational songs that automatically starts playing at your wake-up time. The idea is to create an environment that entices you to get up and move, countering the magnet-like pull to stay in bed. For example, set up a smart home device to play your "Get Up" playlist at 7 AM sharp, making the room fill with invigorating music that makes staying in bed less appealing.
- Design a morning scavenger hunt for yourself where you place motivational notes or small rewards around your living space the night before. This strategy turns the act of getting out of bed into a game, providing immediate, positive reinforcement for leaving the comfort of your sheets. Place a note with an inspiring quote on your bathroom mirror, or hide a favorite treat in the kitchen, giving you a simple but compelling reason to start your day.
- Experiment with a 'bedtime reverse alarm' that signals when to sta ...
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The connection between childhood experiences and present-day bodily sensations
Mel Robbins describes how working with her therapist, she uncovered the root of her morning dread, tracing it back to a distressing childhood event.
Mel's therapist helps her trace the morning dread back to a traumatic childhood experience
As a child, Mel had an upsetting and confusing sexual experience that left her feeling ashamed and like she had done something wrong, which became stored in her body as a somatic response.
Mel discusses a conversation with her therapist, Ann, in which they revisited her past, moving back from her experiences in law school, through college and high school, to a specific event in the fourth grade. During a ski trip, an older kid woke her up in the middle of the night by doing something to her that was weird, upsetting, and confusing. She felt a sense that something was wrong with her and that she had done something wrong.
Anne Davin, working with Mel, helped her to realize that this early childhood trauma associated with waking up, was the source of the dread Mel experienced every morning. This event, and the shame and confusion it caused, became a stored somatic response in Mel's body.
Reflecting on the next morning after the encounter, Mel realized that the sensations she experienced as a child were related to the sensations she struggled with as an adult. This revelation helped her to understand the weight of her morning feelings and the origins of her sense of dread and heaviness when it was time to face the day.
Unresolved childhood experiences can create lasting bodily sensations and patterns
The therapist explains that unprocessed trauma from childhood can manifest as physical sensations and patterns, like Mel's morning dread, that persist into adulthood.
Mel notes that incidents from one's childhood, su ...
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The connection between childhood experiences and present-day bodily sensations
Additional Materials
Counterarguments
- The connection between past trauma and present sensations is complex and not fully understood; other factors may also contribute to present-day feelings like morning dread.
- The idea that trauma is stored in the body is a theory and, while supported by some evidence, is not universally accepted in the scientific community.
- There may be multiple sources of morning dread or similar sensations, and not all may be directly traceable to childhood experiences.
- The process of tracing current emotional states back to childhood events is subjective and can sometimes lead to confirmation bias, where one selectively interprets memories to fit a current narrative.
- Some critics argue that focusing too much on past trauma can inadvertently reinforce a victim mentality and detract from developing coping strategies for the present.
- The role of biological and genetic factors in emotional and physical responses is not addressed, which could offer alternative explanations for some sensations like morning dread.
- The effectiveness of therapy in resolving such issues can vary greatly from person to person, and th ...
Actionables
- Start a morning reflection journal to identify and track any recurring emotional patterns upon waking. Each morning, jot down your immediate feelings and physical sensations. Over time, this can help you recognize if there's a pattern that might be linked to past experiences. For example, if you consistently feel anxious when you wake up, this could be a sign to explore deeper emotional roots.
- Create a personal "body map" to connect physical sensations with emotions. Draw an outline of a body and mark areas where you often feel tension or discomfort. Next to each area, write down the emotions or memories that come to mind. This visual representation can serve as a guide to understanding how your body holds onto past traumas.
- Develop a personalized morning rou ...
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The "slithering" somatic technique and how it works to process and release stored trauma
The "slithering" technique involves slow, deliberate movement to work through negative bodily sensations
Mel Robbins introduces a life-altering technique named "slithering," which she learned from her therapist, Ann Davin. This somatic practice involves engaging the body's heavy, stuck feelings in a slow, deliberate manner rather than trying to suppress or ignore them. To illustrate, Robbins shares that on mornings when it’s hard to get out of bed, she has learned to "slither" out slowly, echoing the physicality of a snake, to address the stuck sensation rather than forcefully pushing past it.
Mel's therapist teaches her to "slither" out of bed, moving her body slowly and with heaviness, rather than trying to push past it.
Ann Davin, Robbins' therapist, encourages her to move with the sensation of dread by "slithering," which arises from observing Mel's unconscious expression of dread every morning. By moving her body in a way that gently confronts this negative sensation and amplifies it in moderation, Robbins can process her emotions more effectively.
Slithering and crawling on the floor allows the body to process and release the stored trauma
Robbins explains the practice in depth, stating that instead of trying to strong-arm through sensations like dread, she has found that moving slowly on the floor, rolling, and "slithering" out of bed can disrupt and break apart the negative feelings. This can be extended to instances where one is on a couch feeling heavy, by sliding off and "slithering" on the floor, this can help fragment the daunting feeling.
By moving her body in a way that embraces the negative sensation, rather than fighting it, Mel is able to work through and release the underlying trauma causing her morning dread.
The morning sensation Robbins describes as heaviness in her chest, like tar stuck within, is counteracted by this "slithering" technique. Davin's strategy is to move toward these difficult sensations instead of shoving them aside. The motivation behind "slithering" is to transition into the day feeling safe and well, as the slow, cr ...
Here’s what you’ll find in our full summary
The "slithering" somatic technique and how it works to process and release stored trauma
Additional Materials
Counterarguments
- The efficacy of the "slithering" technique is anecdotal and may not have a strong evidence base in scientific research.
- Somatic techniques like "slithering" may not be universally effective, as different individuals may respond to trauma in varied ways.
- The description of the technique is somewhat vague and may lack the specificity needed for others to effectively implement it without professional guidance.
- There is a risk that individuals with certain physical conditions or disabilities may find the "slithering" movement difficult or impossible to perform.
- The technique may not address the root causes of trauma and could potentially serve as a temporary coping mechanism rather than a long-term solution.
- The concept of "slithering" out of bed and crawling on the floor may not be practical or appropriate in all living situations or cultures.
- The idea of embracing and amplifying negative sensations could be counterproductive for some, potentially leading to increased anxiety or distress.
- The narr ...
Actionables
- You can integrate gentle stretching into your morning routine to awaken your body's awareness. Start by stretching in bed, focusing on each muscle group and paying attention to any emotional sensations that arise. This can help you become more attuned to your body's signals and may provide a gentle transition into movement, similar to the concept of "slithering."
- Experiment with different types of movement to music that resonates with your mood. Create a playlist of songs that match various emotional states and move freely to them in a private space. This could involve swaying, rolling, or any other movement that feels natural. The goal is to allow the music to guide you through processing emotions, potentially unlocking and dispersing pent-up feelings.
- Practice mindful ...
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Practical guidance and instructions on how to practice the "slithering" technique
Slithering is introduced by Mel Robbins as a technique to help individuals start their mornings differently, potentially shaking off feelings of heaviness and discomfort. Here are the steps and adaptations for practicing the slithering technique based on expert guidance.
Slithering involves sliding out of bed, moving on the floor, and eventually crawling to the bathroom
Mel describes the step-by-step process of slithering out of bed, rolling onto the floor, and slowly crawling to the bathroom, letting her body lead the way.
The process begins by lying in bed and sliding one foot out, allowing gravity to assist, followed by the other foot. You then gently roll out of bed, landing with your full body on the floor. It's important to allow the body to land and give yourself a moment to adjust to the new position.
From here, Robbins details that you should roll around and writhe on the floor to break up the sensation of heaviness. This rolling and writhing are essential to the process, serving as a way to release tension and discomfort.
After spending several minutes on the floor, when the sensation begins to dissipate, you can transition into sitting up or rolling over onto all fours, but avoid standing up right away.
The final part of the slithering technique involves getting on all fours and crawling across the floor towards the bathroom. This crawling is not about speed but about continuing the gentle awakening and processing of bodily sensations.
Slithering can be adapted to individual needs and circumstances
The therapist advises that the technique can be modified for those with physical limitations, and can even be practiced by parents alongside their children.
For individuals with high beds or concerns about the potential for falling, inching to the edge of the bed and transitioning from a half-seated position to lying down can offer a safer alternative. Using your arms for support while transitioning to ...
Here’s what you’ll find in our full summary
Practical guidance and instructions on how to practice the "slithering" technique
Additional Materials
Counterarguments
- The efficacy of the slithering technique is not supported by scientific evidence, and its benefits may be overstated without rigorous research to back up the claims.
- The idea that slithering can release stored trauma might be misleading, as trauma often requires professional treatment such as therapy or counseling, and suggesting a physical technique alone could be insufficient or even harmful for some individuals.
- The technique may not be suitable for everyone, especially those with certain disabilities or mobility issues, despite the suggested adaptations.
- The recommendation to practice slithering with pets or children might not be practical or beneficial for all families, as it could disrupt the pets' or children's routine or cause confusion.
- The concept of rolling and writhing on the floor to release tension might not resonate with or be comfortable for all individuals, and some may find it undignified or unhelpful.
- The suggestion that slithering can be a natural start to one's day may not take i ...
Actionables
- Enhance your slithering experience by integrating gentle music or nature sounds to create a calming atmosphere that can further assist in releasing tension as you move.
- Playing background sounds that mimic a natural environment can deepen the sense of connection with your body's movements. For example, listening to a forest soundscape might make the crawling phase feel more instinctive and grounded.
- Develop a slithering-inspired stretching routine to perform at your desk or during breaks if you have a sedentary job or lifestyle.
- Create a series of stretches that mimic the fluidity of slithering, such as neck rolls, shoulder shrugs, and wrist circles, to maintain the benefits of the technique throughout the day. This can help combat the stiffness associated with prolonged sitting.
- Use visualization t ...
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1-Page Summary- Mel's personal struggles with getting out of bed and negative morning routines
- The connection between childhood experiences and present-day bodily sensations
- The "slithering" somatic technique and how it works to process and release stored trauma
- Practical guidance and instructions on how to practice the "slithering" technique
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