How to Build the Life You Want: Timeless Wisdom for More Happiness & Purpose

Do you look forward to a time when you’ll be happier? In Happier, Harvard professor and positive psychology expert Tal Ben-Shahar argues that greater happiness is accessible to everyone now. He argues that happiness is not an end goal, but an ongoing journey.

Ben-Shahar addresses common misconceptions and offers practical strategies to cultivate happiness in our everyday lives. In this guide, we’ll explore Ben-Shahar’s definition of happiness and consider ways in which people often get the pursuit of happiness wrong. We’ll discuss why happiness is a worthy cause and provide practical strategies to help you prioritize your happiness. Throughout the guide, we’ll supplement Ben-Shahar’s advice with research in the field of positive psychology and additional insights from authors like Catherine Price (The Power of Fun), Nicholas Carr (The Shallows), and Desmond Tutu and the 14th Dalai Lama (The Book of Joy).

Everyone wants to find true happiness in their lives, but many of us believe that happiness can only come from experiencing huge changes—such as a trip around the world or a lottery jackpot. But, as it turns out, you can change everything...without changing much at all.

In The Happiness Project, Gretchen Rubin explains how resolving to make the smallest of changes in your everyday life—using the “good” dishes, remembering friends’ birthdays, or singing in the morning—can translate into more vivid memories, stronger relationships, and a deeper sense of happiness and gratitude in your life.

What’s the key to living well and enjoying life to the fullest—to truly flourishing? Many of us think happiness is the answer. But in Flourish, psychologist and best-selling author Martin E. P. Seligman challenges this idea and argues that other aspects of life matter just as much as, if not more, than happiness. He proposes that instead of prioritizing happiness, we—as individuals and as a society—should cultivate well-being, which is a blend of five elements: positive emotion, engagement, meaning, relationships, and achievement. We can fortify these pillars of well-being by applying the principles of positive psychology in our lives and society so that the whole world can learn to flourish.

In this guide, we’ll define the five pillars of well-being, the benefits of having high well-being, and ways we can use positive psychology to increase personal and global well-being. Along the way, we’ll compare Seligman’s insights on happiness and well-being with those of other psychologists and expand on his findings with actionable advice.

What’s the key to living well and enjoying life to the fullest—to truly flourishing? Many of us think happiness is the answer. But in Flourish, psychologist and best-selling author Martin E. P. Seligman challenges this idea and argues that other aspects of life matter just as much as, if not more, than happiness. He proposes that instead of prioritizing happiness, we—as individuals and as a society—should cultivate well-being, which is a blend of five elements: positive emotion, engagement, meaning, relationships, and achievement. We can fortify these pillars of well-being by applying the principles of positive psychology in our lives and society so that the whole world can learn to flourish.

In this guide, we’ll define the five pillars of well-being, the benefits of having high well-being, and ways we can use positive psychology to increase personal and global well-being. Along the way, we’ll compare Seligman’s insights on happiness and well-being with those of other psychologists and expand on his findings with actionable advice.

The Happiness Hypothesis explores the nature of human happiness, blending the philosophical and theological wisdom of ancient thinkers with insights from the field of positive psychology. Our satisfaction is driven by how our mental filters interpret the events in our lives, with the human brain perpetually divided against itself in the struggle between the desires created by our emotions and the attempts of reason to control them. The key to happiness is to use reason to focus the mind away from desires that will only bring fleeting happiness, while giving in to those desires that will bring lasting fulfillment.

When you compare who you are now to who you want to be, you’re resigning yourself to a life of unhappiness. Your ideal self is constantly changing, making your goals impossible to reach. Instead, you must compare who you are now to who you used to be so that you can see how far you’ve come. This simple shift in thinking makes all the difference in living a happier life.

This is the core principle of The Gap and The Gain and was developed by entrepreneurial coach Dan Sullivan. In the book, organizational psychologist Benjamin Hardy connects Sullivan’s ideas to scientific concepts that help explain why we tend to focus on the future, and how we can train ourselves to focus on the past instead. Hardy and Sullivan argue that making this change can drastically improve your quality of life. In this guide, we’ll elaborate on the psychological concepts that Hardy presents and discuss how empirical research has (or hasn’t) supported the book’s main ideas.