If You’re a People Pleaser Listen to This! (Why Putting Yourself First Isn’t Selfish, It’s Necessary For Real Connection)

Meggan Roxanne and Jay Shetty discuss the hazards of people-pleasing and emphasize the importance of setting boundaries to maintain self-worth and well-being.

Recognizing Effort Imbalance and Others' Boundaries

People-Pleasing Depletes Energy and Self-Respect With Little Return

Roxanne shares her experiences and observations about how her efforts to please others often weren’t reciprocated, resulting in an imbalance. She reveals that she frequently put herself second, which led to the depletion of her energy and self-respect with little to no return. Roxanne also reflects on how her mother’s inclination to please others, forgive without setting boundaries, and tolerate disrespect from her siblings led to her mother feeling anger and disrespect in return. This helped Roxanne recognize the importance of acknowledging others’ boundaries and the pitfalls of disregarding her own.

Enforcing Boundaries to Maintain Self-Care and Relationships

Standing Firm: Saying "No" Without Guilt

Roxanne narrates a specific event with her grandfather where she unapologetically stood her ground against his rude demands, informing him that she would not see him again until he apologized. She stresses the significance of being firm and unafraid to assert one’s boundaries. Shetty adds to the conversation by discussing the harm in being too tolerant under the pretense of being helpful, which may perpetuate harmful behavior from others.

Roxanne emphasizes the importance of enforcing boundaries with others—it’s vital not to fall into the trap of people-pleasing at one's own expense.

Putting Oneself First Is Necessary for Well-Being

Roxanne asserts that while it's good to make others feel happy and valued, it should not come at the expense of one’s mental health and well-being. Shetty explores the concept of prioritizing the virtue of forgiveness for the sake of one’s future self, implying the importance of setting boundaries to maintain self-care. Both Roxanne and Shetty address the n ...

Meggan Roxanne and Jay Shetty delve into the essence of intuition and its crucial role in guiding individuals through life’s decisions, highlighting the strength that comes with nurturing and trusting one’s inner voice over societal expectations or pressures.

Nurturing a Relationship With Intuition and Subconscious

Meggan Roxanne praises practices such as fasting, praying, meditating, and writing to strengthen her relationship with intuition. She finds that through fasting, inspired by her mother and the church, the negative voice within tends to disappear by the third day. Investing daily in her intuition, she removes distractions to better connect with herself, suggesting solo walks and journaling as methods to engage in a dialogue with one's internal voice.

Reflective Practices: Journaling, Fasting, Solo Walks

Reflective practices are mentioned as tools to tap into one's subconscious. Roxanne advises taking up challenges like fasting, stating that journaling and writing down thoughts on solo walks can assist in connecting with internal dialogues. She discusses how fasting compares favorably to meditation for her, being quicker and more intense. She has recently taken up meditation, contributing about 10 to 15 minutes each day, which helps set her day right.

Trust Intuitive Guidance, Even When It "Tests" Resolve

Roxanne touches upon the notion that intuition can test one's resolve through seemingly illogical suggestions. She has decided to depend on her intuition for all life decisions and trusts it with her life. Roxanne compares the development of trust with one's intuition to the cultivation of trust in friendships or relationships. Despite the tests, she insists on the importance of engaging with and following through with one's inner guidance. This, she believes, results in receiving insightful responses from her subconscious, leading to self-discovery.

Honoring Inner Wisdom Over External Validation or Pressures

Trusting Your Inner Voice Over Societal or Family Expectations

From a young age, Roxanne experienced premonitions and believed life would begin at age 30, a conviction she held in spite of her mother's focus on the importance of education. She allowed herself to make mistakes and experiment, leading to a self-affirmed belief in her writing talents later in life. Shetty likewise made decisions based on his passions, thus establishing his confidence in inner guidance which eventually led him to become a monk and embrace storytelling. The common thread in their narratives is the dedication ...

Meggan Roxanne shares her deeply personal journey of losing a cherished parent and adopting practices to honor the departed, offering insights on navigating the demanding emotional landscape of grief.

Impact Of Losing a Cherished Parent

Caring For a Terminally Ill Parent: Emotional and Physical Toll

Roxanne recollects taking a year off to care for her mother, who was diagnosed with stage four cancer in July 2020. As her mother's condition deteriorated, Roxanne handled the heavy responsibilities of caregiving, including washing, feeding, moving her mother, and even sleeping in the hospital for extended periods. This experience brought an intense emotional and physical toll, she remarked, as she watched her mother's energy fade, knowing that time was running out.

At the same time, Roxanne faced the duty of caring for her estranged grandfather after her mother's siblings left him unattended. Roxanne's mother had asked her to care for her grandfather as she was succumbing to cancer, a request that led Roxanne on a journey of finding forgiveness and respect for him.

Reflecting On the Profound Loss After a Loving Parent's Death

Roxanne describes the moment of her mother's passing as a profound loss that imparted a sense of coldness and hollowness. The death of her mother, whom Roxanne considered her best friend, deeply impacted her essence, the fun and the light that others admired in her. After her mother’s death, Roxanne realized that her mother's love and essence were her greatest inheritances, aiding her in the process of evolving and rebuilding her life without her mother’s physical presence.

Adopting Practices and Rituals to Honor the Departed

Recording Conversations, Creating Legacy, Maintaining Traditions For Connection

Roxanne discusses the practices she has adopted to maintain a connection with her departed mother. She recorded many conversations with her mother, covering personal advice for significant future events, thus creating a lasting legacy. Each year, she plays a birthday message recorded by her mother, symbolizing an enduring bond.

She emphasizes the importance of preserving memories, such as taking videos to capture her mother's voice and laughter. Roxanne also mentions practices like listenin ...

The hosts explore how community support, rituals, and personal practices serve as critical components in the process of healing from grief and finding inner peace. Meggan Roxanne shares her personal journey and the pivotal role that community and various practices have played in her life.

The Importance of Community Support During Grief and Transition

Roxanne credits community support as being fundamental during her period of grief. When dealing with the death of her mother, she emphasizes the significance of nurturing relationships which became indispensable.

Kindness From Strangers: Seeking Help and Being Vulnerable

She also recounts finding kindness from strangers in Trinidad, who lifted her spirits and inspired the self-belief necessary to persevere. This support assisted her greatly in rediscovering herself during a transition fraught with grief.

Roxanne mentions how the discounts she receives at stores in her Watford community, a result of the connections her mother had built, show how community bonds can have a durable, positive impact. She aspires to emulate her mother's legacy by spreading light and kindness throughout her community, indicating the cyclical nature of support and benevolence in a communal setting.

Rituals, Traditions, and Spiritual Practices For Solace and Guidance

Roxanne's narrative underscores the healing power of traditional practices, rituals, and the wisdom passed down through generations. She holds the belief, stemming from West Indies traditions, that when someone passes away, the focus should be on celebration rather than mourning, based on the idea that the spirit moves on after three days—a tradition she embraced following her mother’s passing.

Fasting, Meditation & Journaling For Self-Discovery & Inner Peace

Further strengthening her recovery process and quest for inner peace, Roxanne incorporates fasting, meditation, and journaling into ...