4 Ways We Self-Sabotage & 3 Ways to Improve the Relationship We Have With Ourselves

Many people engage in self-sabotaging patterns that prevent them from being happy. Despite their efforts to change, they end up reverting to their unwanted behaviors and feel powerless to adopt healthier patterns.

In How to Do the Work, holistic psychologist and bestselling author Nicole LePera argues that you can live a healthier, happier life by taking control of your self-destructive patterns. According to her, such patterns stem from unresolved childhood traumatic experiences. Therefore, the key to overcoming unwanted patterns lies in addressing these traumas.

This guide discusses LePera’s advice for overcoming self-sabotaging patterns. You’ll come away with the tools to:

• Understand the root cause of your self-sabotaging patterns
• Become more conscious of how childhood conditioning impacts your mental and physical health
• Develop positive patterns that improve your well-being
• Feel happier, healthier, and more in control of your life

Additionally, we’ll expand upon each of LePera’s ideas with research, advice, and actionable ideas from psychologists and self-improvement practitioners.

Achieving your goals and becoming a better person often seems impossible. However, Brianna Wiest explains that the only thing standing in your way is you—and your self-sabotaging behaviors. Wiest explains that you self-sabotage when you desire a change—in yourself, your lifestyle, your career, and so on—but are too afraid to act. This internal conflict creates a barrier between who you are and who you want to be. In The Mountain Is You, Wiest explains that you can overcome this barrier by identifying, understanding, and eliminating the self-sabotaging behaviors that hold you back.

This guide will explain Wiest’s concept of self-sabotage, how to recognize your self-sabotaging behaviors, and what you can do to overcome them. We’ll supplement Wiest’s recommendations with advice from other self-help books like Awaken The Giant Within by Tony Robbins, The Success Principles by Jack Canfield, and The Willpower Instinct by Kelly McGonigal.

We’ve all felt trapped at some point in our lives, when our motivation falters and all our hard work grinds to a halt. In Anatomy of a Breakthrough, Adam Alter argues that everybody hits roadblocks in life, and because we hide our frustration, we’re unaware that everyone else goes through the same thing. However, there’s hope even when you feel trapped, and Alter proposes a range of solutions that might help you find your way out of the woods.

In this guide, we’ll explain what it means to be “stuck,” the barriers that often cause this, and how reacting poorly to a perceived lack of progress can only dig you in deeper. We’ll then describe Alter’s remedy—slowing down, exploring new perspectives, and making your own luck through persistence. We’ll also connect Alter’s ideas with those of other motivation experts, what other writers say about perseverance, and how exploring uncharted terrain can turn failures into opportunities.

Many people engage in self-sabotaging patterns that prevent them from being happy. Despite their efforts to change, they end up reverting to their unwanted behaviors and feel powerless to adopt healthier patterns.

In How to Do the Work, holistic psychologist and bestselling author Nicole LePera argues that you can live a healthier, happier life by taking control of your self-destructive patterns. According to her, such patterns stem from unresolved childhood traumatic experiences. Therefore, the key to overcoming unwanted patterns lies in addressing these traumas.

This guide discusses LePera’s advice for overcoming self-sabotaging patterns. You’ll come away with the tools to:

• Understand the root cause of your self-sabotaging patterns
• Become more conscious of how childhood conditioning impacts your mental and physical health
• Develop positive patterns that improve your well-being
• Feel happier, healthier, and more in control of your life

Additionally, we’ll expand upon each of LePera’s ideas with research, advice, and actionable ideas from psychologists and self-improvement practitioners.

Achieving your goals and becoming a better person often seems impossible. However, Brianna Wiest explains that the only thing standing in your way is you—and your self-sabotaging behaviors. Wiest explains that you self-sabotage when you desire a change—in yourself, your lifestyle, your career, and so on—but are too afraid to act. This internal conflict creates a barrier between who you are and who you want to be. In The Mountain Is You, Wiest explains that you can overcome this barrier by identifying, understanding, and eliminating the self-sabotaging behaviors that hold you back.

This guide will explain Wiest’s concept of self-sabotage, how to recognize your self-sabotaging behaviors, and what you can do to overcome them. We’ll supplement Wiest’s recommendations with advice from other self-help books like Awaken The Giant Within by Tony Robbins, The Success Principles by Jack Canfield, and The Willpower Instinct by Kelly McGonigal.

Do you ever feel like your brain is out to get you? Or do you find yourself unable to connect with others for reasons you can’t understand? You might find that increasing your positive intelligence helps with these difficulties. In Positive Intelligence, best-selling author and lecturer Shirzad Chamine explains how you can train your brain to overcome the thoughts that are sabotaging your happiness and success so you can improve every aspect of your life.

In our guide, we’ll examine the ten ways your brain can sabotage you, as well as how to train your brain to overcome their influence. We’ll also explain how you can use attentional exercises to increase your level of positive intelligence. Finally, we’ll add scientific context for many of Chamine’s ideas, as well as alternative techniques for the tips he offers.

Do you ever feel like your brain is out to get you? Or do you find yourself unable to connect with others for reasons you can’t understand? You might find that increasing your positive intelligence helps with these difficulties. In Positive Intelligence, best-selling author and lecturer Shirzad Chamine explains how you can train your brain to overcome the thoughts that are sabotaging your happiness and success so you can improve every aspect of your life.

In our guide, we’ll examine the ten ways your brain can sabotage you, as well as how to train your brain to overcome their influence. We’ll also explain how you can use attentional exercises to increase your level of positive intelligence. Finally, we’ll add scientific context for many of Chamine’s ideas, as well as alternative techniques for the tips he offers.

Many people engage in self-sabotaging patterns that prevent them from being happy. Despite their efforts to change, they end up reverting to their unwanted behaviors and feel powerless to adopt healthier patterns.

In How to Do the Work, holistic psychologist and bestselling author Nicole LePera argues that you can live a healthier, happier life by taking control of your self-destructive patterns. According to her, such patterns stem from unresolved childhood traumatic experiences. Therefore, the key to overcoming unwanted patterns lies in addressing these traumas.

This guide discusses LePera’s advice for overcoming self-sabotaging patterns. You’ll come away with the tools to:

• Understand the root cause of your self-sabotaging patterns
• Become more conscious of how childhood conditioning impacts your mental and physical health
• Develop positive patterns that improve your well-being
• Feel happier, healthier, and more in control of your life

Additionally, we’ll expand upon each of LePera’s ideas with research, advice, and actionable ideas from psychologists and self-improvement practitioners.

In Self-Compassion, Kristin Neff argues that when you respond to your failings and pain with kindness and comfort, you can manage the most challenging situations life throws at you. This entails understanding that you—like all people—make mistakes and suffer, are intrinsically worthy of care and comfort, and are connected to others through your suffering.

Neff is a pioneer in self-compassion research, whose tenets are rooted in Buddhist psychology. She’s the co-founder of the nonprofit Center for Mindful Self-Compassion, co-developer of the Mindful Self-Compassion training and workbook, and author of Fierce Self-Compassion: How Women Can Harness Kindness to Speak Up, Claim Their Power, and Thrive (2021). Self-Compassion was published in 2015.

In this guide, we’ll examine Neff’s definition of self-compassion and explore the key practices, benefits, and obstacles to embracing it. We’ll also explain how self-compassion can improve your relationship with others, making you a better partner and parent. We’ll also expand on Neff’s claims by comparing them with ideas and advice from other spiritual, psychology, medical, and public health experts.