Book SummaryYou Are A Badass, by Jen Sincero

1-Page Summary1-Page Book Summary of You Are A Badass

Author Jen Sincero was once unimpressed with her life. Though she was a published author and had family and friends, she wondered, “Is this the best I can do?” She embarked on an exhaustive self-improvement journey and found success — she was able to get herself out of a rut and find greater personal and professional success.

After wading through all the good and bad of the self-help world, she decided to take every bit of useful self-improvement advice she found and share it with others via this book.

The main principle she learned is that creating a better life requires only one simple shift: Going from wanting to change your life to deciding to change your life. In You Are a Badass, she shares wisdom about creating a new life, doing things you never thought you’d do, believing in things you can’t see, and pushing past your fears. The book has five sections:

1. How Did I Get This Way? Learn what’s holding you back.
2. How to Leave Insecurity Behind and Love Yourself. Live your best life.
3. Tapping into the Source. Be a part of the power all around you.
4. Getting Over Your Own BS. Make changes to create a life you’ve always wanted.
5. Go Forth and Live Your Dreams. Take action as you live your new life.

Section 1: How Did I Get This Way?

Understand the deep-seated beliefs that have been holding you back. Once you are aware of them, you can begin to change them.

The Subconscious

No matter what you think you want, if there’s a subconscious belief that links your desire to pain, you won’t let yourself achieve it. The first step to getting rid of harmful subconscious beliefs is becoming aware of them.

God or Source Energy

We are connected to a limitless power, but most of us use only a fraction of it. You can call this power whatever you like — God, Universe, Source Energy — but what’s important is developing an awareness of and relationship with the energy around and within you.

Being Present

Instead of being in the moment, we worry about daily life. If we were living in the present, we’d understand that life is a miracle. Being present gets you out of your head and connects you to Source Energy, which raises your frequency, which attracts things of like frequency to you.

The Ego

When you try to break out of your comfort zone and live the life of your dreams, your Ego may try to stop you with emotional and physical roadblocks. “Ego” refers to your “shadow self,” the part of you that, deep down, feels unworthy of love and success. The author refers to the Ego as the “Big Snooze,” or BS.

Self-Perception

Too many of us have a negative self-perception. We think we're inferior and inept. To counter this, try seeing yourself through the eyes of someone who admires you. This person will see only your full potential and talents. You can eventually become your own fan.

Section 2: How to Leave Insecurity Behind and Love Yourself

You need to do certain things to free yourself to live your best life.

Accepting Yourself

When we love ourselves, we are free to live rich, authentic lives. But negative messages can fill us with false beliefs, fear, shame and self-doubt. Fortunately, we can reclaim our self-love and rid ourselves of guilt, self-doubt and loathing to be and have everything we desire. One of the most important things you can do is appreciate just how special you truly are. Understand that there will never be anyone else exactly like you, and nobody In the world will use their gifts as you can.

Don’t Worry About What Others Think

People often live in fear of what others think instead of celebrating who they are. This fear stops you from getting out of your comfort zone and reaching your full potential. When you stop caring what other people think you become your most powerful self.

How do you move to a place where you’re unaffected by the opinions of others? The key is not just denying the criticism any power over you, but also not getting caught up in praise.

When we base our self-worth on what others think of us, we hand over all our power. You have to understand what’s true for you, outside of anyone else’s opinion, good or bad, and hold onto that. Everything else is just someone else’s perception of reality.

Figure Out Your Purpose

We’re all born with unique and valuable gifts to share with the world. When we put them to real use, we get to live a life of purpose. But sometimes finding your purpose can be a confusing process. One of the things you can do when you’re unsure of your purpose is to just take a step. Instead of wasting time trying to figure out the perfect next move, just do something. Pay attention to suggestions and opportunities all around you — and pay attention to how you feel about these options. Does something strike a chord with you? If so, pursue it.

Section 3: Tapping Into the Source

This section explains how to connect to Source Energy to get into top mental and spiritual shape. When you’re connected to Source Energy, you can create your new reality.

Meditation

The goal of meditation is to quiet your mind of all the chatter so you can connect to Source Energy and hear your inner guidance. The basic steps to meditation include:

• Sit up straight in a comfortable cross-legged position; hands on knees or in lap.
• Close your eyes (or open, gazing softly at a spot on the ground) and focus on your breathing.
• Release any thoughts that come into your brain and focus back on breathing.
• Keep your mind as clear and empty as possible to allow flashes of intuition.

Your Thoughts Create Your Reality

Your thoughts and beliefs dictate your reality, so if you want to change your reality, you have to change your thoughts. When you change your thinking, you’ll see evidence of a new life being created around you.

Everything you want is available to you; you just have to shift your perception to see it become...

You Are A Badass Summary Introduction

Author Jen Sincero was once unimpressed with her life. Sure, she had published a couple of books and had family and friends, but she wondered, “Is this the best I can do?” She was barely able to pay the rent each month, dated a series of “weirdos,” and wondered about her deeper purpose. Her life felt lukewarm with “occasional flare-ups of awesomeness.” Deep down she knew she was “a total rock star,” capable of a great relationship and doing important things professionally, but she just couldn’t seem to get there.

Sincero decided to make some serious changes to get her act together, committing to the process of creating a new, better life. She embarked on a self-improvement journey that was at times colorful. She tried a series of self-help methods, including seminars where she had to shout “You’re awesome and so am I,” along with writing a love letter to her uterus, bonding with her spirit guide, participating in a ceremony where she married herself, taking her inner child on a playdate, and spent money that she didn’t have on life coaches.

She “took one for the team,” in essence wading through all the good and bad of the self-help world for the rest of us to pull out the...

You Are A Badass Summary Section 1: How Did I Get This Way? | Chapter 1: Your Subconscious Beliefs

The chapters in this section will help you understand the deep-seated beliefs that have been holding you back. Once you are aware of what’s been keeping you stuck, you can begin to change your life.

When our subconscious beliefs are out of alignment with what our conscious minds want, we experience conflicts between what we’re trying to create and what we actually create.

We all have a conscious mind and a subconscious mind. We are aware of our conscious mind — it’s where we figure things out, worry, and process information. The subconscious mind is non-analytical; it’s where our feelings and instincts reside. It’s where we store all the information we receive as children, and it believes this input without filtering it.

For example, if our parents showed us that marriage means violence, our subconscious stores this as our truth. If our parents tell us that our family just doesn’t know how to make money, we believe them. The subconscious serves as the “blueprint for our lives,”...

You Are A Badass Summary Chapter 2: You’re Not Tapping Into a Greater Power

All of us are connected to a limitless power around us, but most of us use only a fraction of it — we’re missing out on using it to help create a better life. You can call this limitless power whatever you like: God, Goddess, The Universe, Source Energy, Higher Power, gut, intuition, Spirit, The Force, The Zone, or The Lord.

It doesn’t matter what you call it; what is important is that you develop an awareness of and relationship with the energy around and within you.

Sincero was wary of God and snarky about “higher-power” stuff at the beginning of her self-improvement journey. But when she started reading books about finding your true calling, they all had a spiritual bent, so she decided to give God/spirituality a chance. She had nothing to lose. As she meditated more (more about meditation in later chapters) and became more connected with God, or Source Energy, the more she found she could manifest things into her life quickly and specifically. As she...

You Are A Badass Summary Chapter 3: You’re Too Wrapped Up in Your Own Head

Too often we go through life worrying about insignificant things — complaining, playing out dramas in our heads, and justifying our actions. Instead of being in the moment, we worry about daily life. We stress over money, relationships, career success.

If we were living in the present moment, we’d understand that our very lives are a full-blown miracle. In fact, our world is overflowing with miracles that we ignore while dissecting the minutiae of daily life. Animals and small children are great examples of “being present.” A dog will greet you with unadulterated joy even if you’ve been gone only a short time. A child in the midst of playing or drawing has to be dragged away to eat or bathe. They are in the moment and fully immersed in the fun of the present.

**Being present gets you out of your head and...

Shortform Exercise: The Life You Want Is Here Right Now

Get out of your own head and be present in the moment.

Clearing the mind of clutter helps us be more present, and therefore more connected to Source Energy. Do you often get wrapped up in your own head? What worries tend to flow in and take over, stopping you from being present?

You Are A Badass Summary Chapter 4: Your Ego Is Trapping You in Your Comfort Zone

When you try to break out of your comfort zone and live the life of your dreams, your own internal Ego may try to stop you with emotional and physical roadblocks. Ego refers to your “shadow self,” the part of you that, deep down, feels unworthy of love and success. The Ego seeks outside validation to placate your insecurities, assuring you that you’re good enough.

The author refers to the Ego as the “Big Snooze,” or BS. The BS is driven from our limiting false beliefs — the ones ingrained into our subconscious as a child. The BS gets validation from outside sources, not trusting its own opinions. (“I don’t know, what do you think I should do?”) It is fear-based, aiming to keep you safely within the confines of your comfort zone.

In contrast to the Ego is your True Self, or higher self. Your true self lives in the present and operates according to your connection to Source Energy. It gets validation from within, not outside. (“My decision feels right to me and I love and trust myself.”)

We all live life to varying degrees from both perspectives — the Ego and the True Self. But when we skew toward the Ego, we end up with a reality that’s way beneath what we’re capable of and...

Shortform Exercise: The Evil Ego

Sometimes your Ego (BS) will get in the way of your big leaps.

The Ego manifests outside forces to conspire against our efforts to break away from our comfort zones. The author even says this concept is a little “out there.” Examples included flat tires and getting run over by a bus. Do you believe this is possible? Why or why not?

You Are A Badass Summary Chapter 5: Your Negative Self-Perception Is Holding You Back

Too many of us have a negative self-perception. We think we're inferior and inept. But you get to choose how you perceive your reality, and it takes the same amount of energy to see yourself as a loser as it does to see yourself as a rock star. Wouldn’t life be more productive and fun if we embraced ourselves?

The author refers to self-perception as a zoo. Intelligent people think they’re dumb, beautiful people think they’re ugly, great speakers think they’re boring. People vacillate between...

You Are A Badass Summary Section 2: Leaving Insecurity Behind | Chapter 6: Accept Yourself as You Are

Now that you understand your subconscious beliefs about yourself, we’ll discuss what you need to do to free yourself from insecurity, love yourself, and live your best life.

When we truly believe in ourselves and love ourselves, we free ourselves to live rich, full, authentic lives.

We are born with the ability to trust our own instincts: breathing, eating when we’re hungry, not worrying about being judged on our dancing or hairdos. We play, create and love without holding back. But as we grow, we absorb the messages from other people around us — their thoughts, beliefs and judgements — replacing our instincts with negative false beliefs, fear, and self-doubt. This leads to physical and emotional pain we numb with alcohol or other crutches. We settle for a mediocre life.

It’s like we’re born with a big bag of money to fund our dreams, but instead we listen to other people and invest in what they believe. You may believe you’re too old to dance, or become ashamed of your sexuality. You accept that you shouldn’t be doing things you want to do. As we buy into other people’s beliefs, our inner fortune dwindles.

**We invest everything we have into believing we’re not good...

You Are A Badass Summary Chapter 7: Stop Worrying About What Other People Think of You

People often live in fear of what others think instead of celebrating who they are. This fear stops you from getting out of your comfort zone and reaching your full potential. This is partly a survival instinct — humans have always needed the cooperation and support of those around them to survive.

But accomplishing big things means getting out of your comfort zone and risking failure, as well as subjecting yourself to the ridicule and opinions of others.

Other People’s Opinions Are Not Your Problem

When making a decision about your life, rather than worry about the opinions of others, simply ask yourself, Do I want to do this/get this/be this? Is this taking me in the right direction? Am I going to “screw anyone over” if I do this?

You are responsible for what you do, but not for other people’s reactions to it. This is a perception issue: What other people think about you doesn’t have anything to do with you.

Think of a movie. One person could leave the theater in stunned tears, transformed, and moved beyond words. Another person could demand her money back because she thought the movie was a load of garbage. It’s not about the movie; it’s about the...

Shortform Exercise: Other People’s Opinions Are Not Your Problem

Stop living in fear of what other people think.

When you break out of your comfort zone you risk the negative opinions of others. Have you had an experience where your big leap or brave action invited ridicule or derision? How did this make you feel?

You Are A Badass Summary Chapter 8: Figure Out Your Purpose

We’re all born with unique and valuable gifts to share with the world. When we figure out what they are and put them to real use, we get to live a life of purpose. When we share what we are brought here to give, we are in alignment with our highest, most powerful selves.

Think about how exciting and fun it is to give the perfect gift to someone. We’re filled with joy. In reality, we all possess the perfect gift to give to the world, but too many of us keep it locked up, forgotten and gathering dust. Instead, we give the world the equivalent of the “tasteful candle” gift — appropriate, just enough not to be rude, appreciated but not special.

We too often go through life in a job that we hate or that’s just OK. We get by, but never find our true calling and create a life of excitement and joy.

Tips on Finding Your True Calling

Sometimes we’re confused about what we should be doing and how we should be applying our gifts. Here are some tips on getting clear about who you are and what your calling is. (More tips later in the book.)

Be the alien: Imagine you’re an alien and suddenly inhabit your own body. Everything is new to you. Ask yourself, what is this person I’ve...

Shortform Exercise: What’s Your Purpose?

Are you tapping into what brings you great joy?

Do you think you’ve found your true calling yet? If so, what is it and how did you come to discover it? If not, what types of things strike a chord with you? (It’s OK if they seem completely random.)

You Are A Badass Summary Chapter 9: Be True to Yourself, No Matter What

Loving yourself and being true to yourself is a powerful skill that means tapping into what brings you the greatest joy — and then doing it.

The author shares an anecdote that exemplifies loving yourself and being true to yourself.

Hiking deep into the rocky desert canyons of southeast Utah with...

You Are A Badass Summary Section 3: Tapping Into the Source | Chapter 10: Meditation

This section explains how to connect to Source Energy to get into top mental and spiritual shape. When you’re connected to Source Energy, you can create your new reality.

The goal of meditation is to quiet your mind of all the chatter so you can connect to Source Energy and hear your inner guidance. Meditation is at once simple and hard. Sitting still and thinking about nothing is harder than it seems, which is why it’s called a meditation practice.

With meditation, start small and work your way up — five minutes is sufficient at the beginning. There are no rules or set ways to meditate, but doing it will drastically improve your life because it connects you to Source Energy (“The Zone” or the “Vortex”).

Meditation will bring you into the present moment. raise your frequency, open you up to receive unlimited information and ideas, relax you, relieve stress, strengthen intuition and focus, let you hear your inner voice more clearly, fill you with light and love, put you in a good mood, and help you love yourself.

Not every meditation session will be profound. You may have enlightening...

You Are A Badass Summary Chapter 11: Our Thoughts Create Our Realities

Getting a handle on your thoughts is key to changing your life. Albert Einstein once said, “The world as we have created it is a process of our thinking. It cannot be changed without changing our thinking.”

Your thoughts and beliefs dictate your reality, so if you want to change your reality, you have to change your thoughts. When you change your thinking, you’ll see evidence of a new life being created around you. It’s not the other way around — you can’t wait for the evidence and then change your thinking.

Understand that everything you want is available to you; you just have to shift your perception to see it become reality. Your job isn’t to figure out how your dreams will become reality; it’s to know what you want and be open to receiving the how. You do this with your thoughts.

**Keep your...

You Are A Badass Summary Chapter 12: Get in Touch With Your Inner Beginner

No matter what stage of life we’re in, if we harness the ability we had in our youth to continuously live our dreams, we can reach our goals and live with more joy.

When we’re young we dive into creative pursuits with reckless abandon, getting spectacular results. But when we’re older and wiser, we live less “present in our purpose,” taking on more grown-up versions of life. It’s like being responsible equals not having fun anymore.

It’s harder to dream and take on big goals as we move through life because we have to overcome judgements and ignore fears we’ve gained from past experiences. But when we reconnect with our inner kid, we can focus on the positives instead of the list of negatives life may have handed us.

Learn From Your Younger Self

You can learn a lot from how you lived your life in the “old days.” Think of a time in your life when you felt like you were...

Shortform Exercise: Your Inner Beginner

Have you lost the fun in your pursuits?

You can learn a lot from how you lived your life in the “old days.” Think about a time in your past where you were firing on all cylinders, living life with gusto and not thinking too hard about the “right way” to do things. When was it, and what were you doing?

You Are A Badass Summary Chapter 13: Give and Receive

If you want to attract good things and feelings into your life, you must send good things out to everyone around you. Giving is one of our greatest joys as well as being a fearless and powerful action. When we trust that there is plenty out there in The Universe, we can give freely. This raises our frequency, strengthens our faith, and puts us in a position to receive abundant amounts in return.

But when we live in fear and hold onto what we have because we don’t trust that there’s any more out there for us, we stifle our energy and create more lack — the very thing we’re hoping to avoid.

Giving and receiving depend on each other; the more you give, the more you receive.

Receiving shouldn’t be confused with greedily taking — that’s a different, negative energy...

You Are A Badass Summary Chapter 14: Practice Gratitude

Gratitude is a state of being — having an awareness of and appreciation for the many miracles in your life. Think about how it feels when you thank someone for doing something incredible for you. You feel great, having received whatever it was and sending out thanks; they feel great for being appreciated, then you feel great again — it’s an endless circle of good feelings.

Because being in a state of gratitude creates such good feelings, it puts you at a high frequency, connecting you to Source Energy, which puts you in a powerful position to manifest more good things and experiences.

The more you can stay in a state of gratitude, the stronger your connection to Source Energy and the more effortlessly you’ll be able to manifest something you can’t see into your reality.

When you are not in a state of gratitude, you cut yourself off from the potential flow of good things into your life. When you’re disappointed, angry, guilty or oblivious instead of grateful, you’re at a lower frequency, less connected to Source Energy, and in a less powerful state to manifest good things into your life.

Gratitude and Power

Wallace Wattles perfectly expressed the power of gratitude in...

Shortform Exercise: Finding the Good in Any Situation

Be thankful for what you haven’t received yet.

Having faith means being grateful for what you don’t have yet — and then manifesting it. The author’s example was her knack for finding great parking spaces. Have you ever had that kind of experience? Do her words about being thankful before it happens ring true to you?

You Are A Badass Summary Chapter 15: Practice Forgiveness

When you hold onto resentment, you give away your power. It’s like “taking poison and waiting for your enemies to die.” When you carry around guilt and resentment, your Ego is in charge. It holds onto the past, keeps you a prisoner to your pain, and lowers your frequency.

But when you decide to forgive and let negative feelings melt away, you are on the path to freedom. Your higher self is in charge and you own your power, banishing the anger, resentment and hurt.

When you have an issue with someone you love, explain how you feel, but don’t blame. Forgive them regardless of the outcome. When you have an issue with someone you don’t care about, just free yourself and let it go, regardless of whether or not they understand how wrong they are. Forgiving someone is not letting them off the hook — it’s letting yourself off the hook.

Tips on Learning to Forgive

How do you actually let go of the negative feelings and forgive?

Compassion. The only way to truly heal after someone does something awful to you is to find compassion for them (or yourself, if that’s who you need to forgive). One technique is to imagine the person who wronged you as a child. Think of them...

Shortform Exercise: The Art of Forgiveness

Forgiving is for your benefit, not the other person's.

One of the tips on learning to forgive is to have compassion for the person who wronged you and picture them as a child acting out of fear. Is there someone you are trying to forgive? If you were to try this compassion technique, what would their story be?

You Are A Badass Summary Chapter 16: Learn to Go With the Flow

Going with the flow of life, dealing with the unexpected in a positive way, and finding the joy in frustrating situations are ways to grow as a person and create a richer life.

The author recounts an experience during a trip to India that taught her how to go with the flow and get to know your neighbor instead of stressing. She says you can learn everything you need to know about spirituality and life by taking a 12-hour bus ride through India during wedding season.

On what was supposed to be a 5-hour nonstop bus ride to Delhi from Agra, she instead found herself on a bus that seemed not to...

You Are A Badass Summary Section 4: Getting Over Your Own BS | Chapter 17: Rewriting Your Story

This section will help you make concrete changes in your life to create the reality you’ve always wanted.

Sometimes we can get so deeply wrapped up in the stories we’ve told ourselves that we can’t see the endless possibilities and opportunities that surround us. We’re trapped by stories like, “I’ll never make enough money,” “I’m lazy,” “All the good men are taken.”

But the truth is, what you choose to focus on becomes your reality. If you stop focusing on these negative, self-limiting stories that frame your reality, you’d realize that you can create any reality you want.

To illustrate the infinite possibilities around us that we don’t see, try this exercise: Look around your room and take a minute to count all the red things you see. Then stop, look down, and try to think of everything yellow around you. There’s probably a lot — but you didn’t see it because you were looking for red.

Leave Your Old Self Behind

We often hide behind our negative stories, using them as excuses to not reach for our dreams. When Sincero finds herself wrapped up in her own excuses and feeling sorry for herself, she thinks of Ray Charles. Broke, blind, orphaned and discriminated...

Shortform Exercise: Write a New Story for Yourself

It’s time to create a new reality.

What is one of your self-sabotaging false realities? To help you find out, fill in the blanks on these phrases: “I always …, I never …, I can’t … I should …, I suck at …, I wish …, I don’t have ..., I’m trying to...

You Are A Badass Summary Chapter 18: Stop Procrastinating and Just Do It

If you’re serious about changing your life, you’ll find a way. If you’re not, you’ll find an excuse.

Procrastination is an easy form of self-sabotage; there’s no shortage of fun things you can do to help you procrastinate, as well as people eager to procrastinate with you. One form of procrastination is simply not going for a challenge or experience we really want because we tell ourselves we’re “not qualified.” What we’re really saying is that we’re too scared to do it, not that we can’t do it. We talk ourselves out of going for an opportunity because we lack the experience or qualifications, but in reality, what we lack is the determination to do what we need to do.

We put a ton of energy in to coming up with excuses why we can’t be, do, or have what we want; what if we focused all that energy on going for it instead?

In actuality, we know more than we give ourselves credit for, we’re drawn to things we’re naturally good at, there’s no better teacher than necessity, and passion trumps fear.

To illustrate this the author shares how she blustered her way into an event planning job out of college...

You Are A Badass Summary Chapter 19: Stop Feeling Overwhelmed

Sometimes a massive to-do list can cause panic, leaving us completely overwhelmed, wondering how we’re going to do it all. This drama we create when we’re overwhelmed can be fixed by a simple shift in perception. Rather than completely freaking out about all we have on our plates, we can instead see our opportunities and responsibilities as blessings.

There are three common complaints behind our feelings of overwhelm; we can shift our perception of them and get a more pleasant perspective on our huge to-do lists:

• There’s not enough time.
• There’s too much to do.
• I’m exhausted.

There’s Not Enough Time

Time, like the rest of reality, is in your mind. You can make it work for you instead of being its slave. For example, you may think you don’t have time to find a proper parking space, so you park in the red zone. But this can lead to three hours wasted getting your car out of a tow garage. You may think you don’t have time to clean your office. But this can lead to wasting half an hour searching for your phone under piles of junk.

There are some key strategies to help you start handling your time better:

Show time some respect. If you’re constantly late,...

You Are A Badass Summary Chapter 20: Get Rid of Fear

When we’re ready to break out of our comfort zones and start creating a new life, we’re too often held back by fear. Fear is always there, surrounding us, ready to pounce and stop us from taking chances, but we can choose whether we’ll engage with it or drown it out.

Fear has become a habit, instilled in childhood. We’re taught to fear the world and play it safe, cautioning everyone around us. We’re so conditioned to do this that when others share their excitement over their big, brave plans — I’m traveling around the world by myself! I’m quitting my job to become an actor! — we answer with fear, caution and alarm. This is akin to something called the “crab effect.” When a bunch of crabs are in a bowl and one tries to climb out, the rest will try to pull him back down instead of helping him.

Our world would be very different if, instead of being taught to fear, we were taught to believe in miracles — that anything is possible.

The main drawback of fear is that it lives in the future: what we’re afraid of hasn’t happened yet. We have no idea if what we fear will actually ever happen. For example, we’re often fearful of death, but for all we know it could be a state of...

Shortform Exercise: Fight the Fear

Banish troubling thoughts and enjoy the calm.

Fear lives in the future: what we’re afraid of hasn’t happened yet. What is something you fear that hasn’t happened yet? How likely is it that it will happen?

You Are A Badass Summary Chapter 21: Understand That Others Reflect Our Own Insecurities

The people you surround yourself with act as mirrors onto whom you project your own faults and insecurities.

We are both attracted to and annoyed by qualities other people possess. When we are annoyed by them, we’re projecting onto them something we hate about ourselves, or their behavior triggers a fear or insecurity we may not even know we have.

When we think they’re great, we’re projecting something we like about ourselves (even if we haven’t quite developed it yet). If you actively don’t like something about someone else, it means it resonates with you on some level; it has some kind of meaning for you.

The people you surround yourself with act as mirrors for who you are and how much — or little — you love yourself. Your reality is created by what you focus on and how you interpret it — this goes for people too. What you focus on about other people is part of the reality you are creating.

The author gives this example: if your new boyfriend calls you “the Giant Dumbass,” you may choose to interpret this as a red flag indicating this is a bad relationship. Or you could take it as a sign that he’s hurting deep down and needs your love to save him. Either way, your...

Shortform Exercise: Everybody’s a Mirror

Other people’s annoying qualities are your annoying qualities.

Think of someone who annoys the living daylights out of you. What specifically bothers you? How does this person make you feel?

You Are A Badass Summary Chapter 22: Know That Life Is Good

Your life is happening right now, so don’t miss out. When it comes to the people and life you love, what could be more important than soaking it all up right now while you still can?

If there’s...

You Are A Badass Summary Section 5: Go Out and Live Your Dreams | Chapter 23: Make a Decision

This section explains what you need to do to take action as you create your new life.

Making a decision means you’ll do whatever it takes to reach your goal. When you make a real decision, you will keep moving toward that goal no matter what roadblocks appear in your path. All too often, we pretend to decide — in reality, we’re just trying until it gets too hard.

For example, Henry Ford decided that his car would have an engine with 8 cylinders cast in one block. All the engineers said it was impossible; time after time he sent them back to try again until they managed to do the impossible. He wouldn’t let any roadblock deter him after he made his decision.

To be able to make a true decision about a goal, it’s critical to have a connection to Source Energy and an unwavering belief in yourself. If we don’t have this faith, we can fall prey to our own and everyone else’s fears, and risk giving up at the first sign of failure. In fact, temporary failure is a part of succeeding, and there are countless examples of this: Henry Ford had already gone bankrupt in his first auto company attempt when his V8 engine was finally a success. Michael Jordan was cut from his high...

You Are A Badass Summary Chapter 24: Make Peace with Making Money

When you expand your idea of what’s available to you in all areas of life, and decide to go after big things, you open yourself up to the means of accomplishing it — money. Money is energy, just like anything else. When you are operating at a high frequency, you align your energy with the money you seek and manifest the money you want and need to fuel your new life.

When you place yourself in a new, bigger game — starting your own business, sending your kids to a private school, hiring a housecleaner, or whatever you set your sights on — you either pay for it with money you have or you manifest the money.

The author had an experience with manifesting money when she needed to buy a new car. With an empty bank account and a broken-down car, she test drove an amazing Audi and a practical Honda. She bought the Audi not knowing how she was going to pay for it, but once she made the decision she almost immediately created new income sources. She stopped “playing small” and went for something out of her reach, and big things ensued — her business took off financially, she travelled and got a book deal, and was able to make charitable contributions close to her heart.

When you...

Shortform Exercise: Manifesting Money

Money isn’t just about money. It’s about how you see yourself.

It’s important to clearly understand how you feel about money. What are your deeply ingrained beliefs about money? Are these beliefs holding you back from creating wealth and living the kind of life you want to live?

You Are A Badass Summary Chapter 25: Surrender to the Universe

Sometimes we want something so badly and work tirelessly to achieve it, but end up pushing it away because we’re afraid. We try to control our circumstances via our old patterns and limiting beliefs. We try to take charge, which is fear-based thinking.

The answer is to surrender, allowing The Universe to do its job. Allowing is love-based thinking. Surrendering isn’t letting go or giving up; it’s releasing the outcome to The Universe and having faith that our deepest desires are coming into our lives.

It’s like hiring a cleaning person. You instruct them but then leave them alone, trusting they’ll do the job. If you hover and try to do it yourself, you stop yourself from reaping the benefits that inspired you to hire them in the first place.

Since energy needs to flow or else stagnate, surrendering puts you in the flow. Surrendering not only creates the space to manifest your desires, but opens you up to things outside of your own realm of imagination.

Since you’ve never seen your new reality, you may not know exactly what it will look like. Maybe it will look exactly as you pictured it. Maybe it’s so awesome you couldn’t have conceived of it. Don’t hold...

You Are A Badass Summary Chapter 26: Take Action

Lots of people really want to change. They invest time and money into it, signing up for courses or reading self-help books, but they never do anything with it all. Ultimately, they don’t want to leave their comfort zone to actually make anything happen.

What separates the successful from the unsuccessful is the willingness to get and stay uncomfortable. They keep pushing through new challenges, not sliding back into their comfort zone once they’ve conquered one challenge. Successful people make a habit of getting uncomfortable, moving through each new challenge instead of settling.

Succeeding is like a muscle; you have to exercise it to keep it strong. If you overcome a challenge but then sit back and wait for good things to happen, you lose your muscle mass.

Instead, when you keep moving, pushing through obstacles, you’ll continue to grow and learn, breaking through to more and more levels — and new levels bring new challenges.

Facing and moving through obstacles and challenges bring growth. It’s like birth — messy and painful, but ultimately bringing forth the miracle of new life.

Making Big Changes in Your Life

However you want to upgrade your life, it’s...

Shortform Exercise: Change Means Getting and Staying Uncomfortable

It’s time to exercise your success muscle.

Think of a time you overcame a challenge. How did it feel? Did you sit back and relax afterwards or did you move on to a new challenge?

You Are A Badass Summary Chapter 27: Believe It’s Possible

Whatever you desire to do with your life, be it start a business, lose weight, build an orphanage or direct movies — believe it’s possible, available to you, and that...