Book SummaryDo Hard Things, by Steve Magness

1-Page Summary1-Page Book Summary of Do Hard Things

The way we think about toughness, according to Steve Magness, is all wrong. We traditionally define toughness as a combination of machismo, lack of emotion, and outward displays of dominance and control. But Magness claims that this “old-school” definition of toughness is harmful and that real toughness is defined by confronting reality, acknowledging your thoughts, feelings, and emotions, and using a multitude of strategies to cope with discomfort or adversity. In Do Hard Things, Magness describes this new, more accurate, and more effective way of thinking about toughness, which will help you overcome challenges and make better, more thoughtful decisions.

An expert on performance and coaching, Magness has also written The Science of Running and co-authored _[Peak...

Do Hard Things Summary How We Misunderstand Toughness

Magness claims that the first step in becoming a truly tougher person is understanding what old-school toughness gets wrong. One of the significant problems with old-school toughness is the notion that you can tackle any challenge through sheer force of will. Though this may work sometimes, tackling problems this way will eventually cause most people to burn out or give up entirely. When facing a difficult challenge, instead of plowing ahead, it’s better to slow down, orient yourself, and make thoughtful decisions on how to best move forward. There’s more than one solution to your problems, and real toughness is about finding a solution any way you can, not pushing yourself past your limits.

(Shortform note: Magness claims that the old-school notion that you should fight through the pain or tough it out leads to stress and burnout. We can see evidence of this in the working world: Although [work-life balance is increasingly important to...

Do Hard Things Summary Strategy 1: Face Reality

Now that we understand what old-school toughness gets wrong, Magness explains his first step in becoming a tougher, more resilient person: facing reality. Facing the reality of a situation and the reality of your capabilities is an important first step because to make the best decisions when facing adversity, you need to accurately assess the problem and what you can do to solve it.

Set Realistic Expectations

The key to facing reality lies in having accurate expectations, claims Magness. During a difficult task, our brains are constantly calculating whether things are going better or worse than expected. When they’re going as expected, or better than expected, it’s easy to stay motivated and positive because it’s all going according to plan. If things are harder than expected, you’re more likely to have negative thoughts and feelings that spiral and cause you to give up or panic.

(Shortform note: In Becoming Bulletproof, former secret-service agent Evy Poumpouras echoes Magness’ argument, saying that [setting realistic expectations is a crucial part of being a resilient...

Do Hard Things Summary Strategy 2: Understand Your Emotions

Another key attribute of a truly tough person is the ability to understand your emotions. Magness claims that emotions protect us; they help us navigate the world. If you suppress your feelings and emotions, you’re suppressing your ability to navigate the world effectively. Old-school toughness tells you that you should listen to some emotions (like joy, pride, or anger) while ignoring others (like sadness or fear). Magness, however, claims that you should try to understand and interpret all of your feelings and emotions so that you can make better choices.

Feelings give us important information that we should listen to, claims Magness. Instead of viewing emotions as things that get in our way, as the old-school version of toughness might advise, we should listen and try to understand what our feelings and emotions are telling us. When you understand why you’re feeling a certain way, you can use that information to make better decisions.

Understanding Toxic Masculinity and Old-School Toughness

The notion that toughness involves suppressing certain emotions is a key component of [toxic...

Do Hard Things Summary Strategy 3: Listen to Your Inner Voices

Another key aspect of toughness, according to Magness, is learning how to interpret and deal with internal debates. When making a decision, we all have several “voices” in our heads pointing us to a certain behavior. In normal, everyday decisions, like deciding what to wear to work, these voices are calm and collected, helping us make a somewhat easy, unimportant choice. In challenging situations, however, ones that require toughness, there might be several voices competing loudly against each other, pushing you toward different behaviors. Navigating these loud voices and making a decision based on them is much more difficult.

Old-school toughness teaches you to simply ignore the voices that don’t align with your goals, like the voice telling you to give up. Magness writes that instead of ignoring these voices, we should acknowledge and respond to them, as when we consciously recognize our doubts, fears, or other emotions, we can make better decisions.

(Shortform note: While Magness claims that we should acknowledge our inner voices to make the best decisions, some, like Malcolm Gladwell in Blink, argue that this...

Do Hard Things Summary Strategy 4: Zoom In or Zoom Out

Magness states that true toughness is about learning to deal with pain or discomfort, whether it be mental, physical, or emotional. This means being flexible—broadening or narrowing your focus depending on the situation. Magness claims that the toughest people—those who can thrive in the face of adversity—know when to shift between a broad and narrow state of mind. On the other hand, the only strategy of old-school toughness is to fight against pain and push through. This approach focuses your attention only on the specific task you’re currently working on.

What a Samurai Warrior Says About Toughness

In The Book of Five Rings, 16th-century Samurai warrior Miyamoto Musashi provides advice on individual combat that echoes Magness’s advice on dealing with life challenges. Musashi argues that maintaining awareness and adaptability is key to successful combat. For instance, he says that knowing your environment (the terrain, enemy positioning, climate) is crucial in maintaining control in a situation....

Shortform Exercise: Combat the Effects of Old-School Toughness

Examine how the ideas of “old-school” toughness have affected your life and how you could do things differently.

Think of a time when, in hindsight, you set unrealistic expectations for yourself. What were those expectations, and how were they unrealistic? Did these expectations make things easier or harder when things got difficult? How might things have gone differently if you’d been more realistic in your expectations?