Advice To Avoid, The Dark Side of Therapy, and Taking Your Own Medicine

In The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck, Mark Manson argues that we are frustrated in life and feel like failures because we value and prioritize the wrong things, thanks in part to society’s emphasis on positive thinking, over-involved parents, and our susceptibility to superficial social media messages. This leads us to pursue emotional highs that don’t lead to lasting happiness.

The solutions are counterintuitive and include: be wrong, fail, tolerate feeling bad, accept pain, practice rejection. Because we can’t care equally about everything, we need to prioritize and focus on what brings us happiness and meaning. In other words, we need to carefully choose what we give our f*cks about.

The book draws from several established philosophies (Stoicism, Existentialism, and Buddhism), and we’ll expand and clarify the book’s messages by tracing their origins to these schools of thought. We’ll also explore some of the psychology behind what motivates people’s decisions, and why we’re driven to give so many f*cks about so many unimportant things.

When someone’s dealing with a problem at work, is your first instinct to give them advice? In The Advice Trap, coaching expert Michael Bungay Stanier explains that advice-giving can lead to more problems than solutions and encourages you, instead, to adopt a coaching style of leadership. Stanier argues that when you learn to approach difficult conversations with questions instead of suggestions, you’ll unlock the full potential of your team and relieve yourself of unnecessary burdens.

In this guide, we’ll look at three ways of thinking that drive people to give advice and why Stanier believes it to be a counterproductive leadership approach. We’ll also explore how to subdue that compulsion and how adopting a questions-first approach can foster a more confident, effective, and growth-driven team. Along the way, we’ll explore insights from other experts and compare them with Stanier’s arguments.

Positive behavior change is one of the most persistent challenges of personal growth—and in How to Change, Katy Milkman draws from the latest research and presents a powerful strategy for creating lasting change. She argues that real behavior change comes from a deliberate, scientific understanding of how human nature gets in our way and how we can leverage it to our advantage.

Milkman, an economist and professor at The Wharton School of the University of Pennsylvania, explains how to tailor solutions to your specific challenges, subvert common human failings, and cement lasting change. In this guide, we’ll detail her evidence-based approach to behavioral change and discuss her “playbook” for overcoming human foibles ranging from a lack of self-confidence to forgetfulness and procrastination. In commentary, we’ll look at adjacent perspectives on behavioral change from books such as Atomic Habits, Nudge, Awaken the Giant Within, and Hooked.

In The Myth of Normal, physician and trauma expert Gabor Maté writes that much of what society labels as abnormal behavior, mental illness, or dysfunction actually represents normal responses to adverse life experiences. He contends that the conventional medical model pathologizes normal coping mechanisms like emotional numbing as “diseases” requiring pharmaceutical treatment. He instead advocates a trauma-informed perspective that addresses the root psychological and social causes of what we label as illness.

In this guide, we’ll explore Maté’s argument, focusing on:

• How what we define as “normal” health and behaviors are determined by social, economic, and cultural systems
• The role of trauma in determining our health
• How racism, misogyny, and capitalism instill and reinforce that trauma
• How the biopsychosocial model of health and nontraditional healing practices like yoga, meditation, and psychedelics can improve health outcomes

We’ll also supplement his analysis with insights from other experts on trauma, early childhood development, addiction, and more.

In The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck, Mark Manson argues that we are frustrated in life and feel like failures because we value and prioritize the wrong things, thanks in part to society’s emphasis on positive thinking, over-involved parents, and our susceptibility to superficial social media messages. This leads us to pursue emotional highs that don’t lead to lasting happiness.

The solutions are counterintuitive and include: be wrong, fail, tolerate feeling bad, accept pain, practice rejection. Because we can’t care equally about everything, we need to prioritize and focus on what brings us happiness and meaning. In other words, we need to carefully choose what we give our f*cks about.

The book draws from several established philosophies (Stoicism, Existentialism, and Buddhism), and we’ll expand and clarify the book’s messages by tracing their origins to these schools of thought. We’ll also explore some of the psychology behind what motivates people’s decisions, and why we’re driven to give so many f*cks about so many unimportant things.

What is a “self”? Should we look for our selves in our innermost feelings or in our social contexts and traditions? In The Rise and Triumph of the Modern Self, Carl Trueman argues that cultural developments of the past three centuries have transformed our conception of selfhood—from a self rooted in religion, tradition, and community to one rooted in individualism, emotion, and sexuality. A professor of biblical studies and ecclesiastical history, Trueman asserts that this change has been disastrous for Western culture because it undermines traditional Christian understandings of marriage, gender, and authority while stigmatizing Christian beliefs as bigoted and irrational.

Our guide will explore Trueman's historical analysis, from the philosophy of the Enlightenment to the rise of the LGBTQ+ alliance and the student activism of the left. You'll read about 19th-century English poetry, the rise of internet pornography, and Sigmund Freud's take on childhood sexuality. Our commentary also dives into the historical context of these developments while exploring multiple perspectives on the culture wars of today.

Shooting selfies on vacation. Posting Facebook updates on our kid's graduation from pre-school. Garnering awards and promotions to add to our LinkedIn profiles. Guess what, America? We've become self-obsessed. In David Brooks’s The Road to Character, the New York Times columnist suggests we take a good hard look at ourselves and remember that we weren't always so narcissistic.

Brooks outlines the moral shift that took place after World War II when we transitioned from honoring humility, self-discipline, and public service to worshiping at the altar of "the Big Me." He also reminds us that our current self-focus isn't even making us happy. To help us recalibrate our moral compasses, Brooks details the lives of war heroes, civil rights activists, advocates for the poor, writers, and deep thinkers who've tackled the work of building moral character, then outlines a 15-point plan to help us live more virtuous—and ultimately happier—lives.