Podcasts > The Diary Of A CEO with Steven Bartlett > Jimmy Fallon: I Didn't Expect It To Be This Brutal! Nothing Worked. I Was Starving & Had A Suicide Pact With Myself!

Jimmy Fallon: I Didn't Expect It To Be This Brutal! Nothing Worked. I Was Starving & Had A Suicide Pact With Myself!

By Steven Bartlett

In this episode of The Diary Of A CEO, Jimmy Fallon shares his journey from aspiring comedian to Saturday Night Live cast member. He describes the financial hardships and setbacks he faced while pursuing his singular dream of joining SNL, including taking classes at the Groundlings to perfect his impressions and navigating multiple auditions before finally landing a spot on the show at age 23.

The conversation also explores Fallon's relationship with his mother Gloria, whose support shaped his early career, and his evolution beyond SNL to hosting The Tonight Show. Fallon discusses his ventures into production, brand partnerships, and theme park attractions, while reflecting on fame's challenges and his outlook on the entertainment industry's future as he approaches age 50.

Jimmy Fallon: I Didn't Expect It To Be This Brutal! Nothing Worked. I Was Starving & Had A Suicide Pact With Myself!

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Jimmy Fallon: I Didn't Expect It To Be This Brutal! Nothing Worked. I Was Starving & Had A Suicide Pact With Myself!

1-Page Summary

Fallon's Quest to Join SNL

From a young age, Jimmy Fallon had one singular dream: to become a cast member on "Saturday Night Live." Growing up in a family of avid SNL watchers, Fallon studied the show meticulously, watching and rewatching recorded episodes to perfect his understanding of comedy.

Determination Through Setbacks

After moving to LA, Fallon took classes at the Groundlings to improve his impressions while facing significant financial hardship. Despite the challenges, he maintained his resolve, even securing a Warner Brothers Television deal with a special clause allowing him to leave for an SNL audition.

The Path to SNL Success

Though Fallon's first SNL audition left him feeling disappointed, his second attempt proved more successful. His Adam Sandler impression notably made Lorne Michaels laugh—a rare occurrence during auditions. At age 23, Fallon finally received the call he'd been waiting for: an offer to join the SNL cast.

A Mother's Influence

Gloria Fallon played a crucial role in Jimmy's success, offering unwavering support and encouragement throughout his career. Jimmy speaks of how his mother's consistent support and hearty laugh built his confidence. Her passing marked what Jimmy describes as the most challenging period of his life.

Beyond SNL

Fallon's career expanded significantly beyond SNL, transitioning from "Late Night" to "The Tonight Show." He has ventured into various creative and entrepreneurial projects, including founding a production company, creating the "Tonight Dough" ice cream flavor with Ben & Jerry's, and designing a Universal Studios roller coaster.

Reflecting on Fame and Longevity

As he approaches 50, Fallon shares insights about the unexpected challenges of fame and his increased focus on health and longevity. He maintains an optimistic view of the entertainment industry's evolution, believing that regardless of platform changes, people's desire for storytelling and laughter remains constant.

1-Page Summary

Additional Materials

Clarifications

  • Lorne Michaels is a prominent Canadian-American television writer and producer known for creating and producing iconic shows like "Saturday Night Live" and "The Tonight Show." He has received numerous awards for his contributions to television. Michaels played a pivotal role in launching the careers of many comedians and actors through his work on various comedy programs. His influence and impact on the entertainment industry, particularly in the realm of comedy, are widely recognized and celebrated.
  • Jimmy Fallon transitioned from hosting "Late Night with Jimmy Fallon" to hosting "The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon." "Late Night" was a late-night talk show that aired after "The Tonight Show," while "The Tonight Show" is a prestigious late-night talk show with a long history in American television. The transition marked a significant career advancement for Fallon, moving from a later time slot to the coveted earlier slot traditionally held by iconic hosts like Johnny Carson and Jay Leno. The change in hosting roles brought increased visibility and responsibility for Fallon in the late-night television landscape.
  • The "Tonight Dough" is a popular ice cream flavor created by Jimmy Fallon in collaboration with Ben & Jerry's. It features caramel and chocolate ice creams with chocolate cookie swirls, chocolate chip cookie dough, and peanut butter cookie dough chunks. The flavor was inspired by Fallon's love for ice cream and his role as the host of "The Tonight Show." The "Tonight Dough" flavor has been well-received by fans of both Jimmy Fallon and Ben & Jerry's ice cream.

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Jimmy Fallon: I Didn't Expect It To Be This Brutal! Nothing Worked. I Was Starving & Had A Suicide Pact With Myself!

Fallon's Quest to Join SNL

Jimmy Fallon's journey to join the "Saturday Night Live" (SNL) cast demonstrates his single-minded determination and belief in himself, despite numerous setbacks.

Young Jimmy Aspired to Join Saturday Night Live Cast

Ambition to Perform On the Show He Watched Religiously

From a young age, Fallon had one ultimate dream—to become a cast member on "Saturday Night Live," a show he found electric, edgy, and the pinnacle of comedy. Every year, on his birthdays or whenever he had the chance to make a wish, his wish was to be on SNL. His family, who were avid SNL watchers, were among the first to have a VCR, which allowed them to record the show so Jimmy could rewatch and study the sketches meticulously.

Jimmy's Relentless Pursuit of His Goal

During his high school years, Fallon's obsession with SNL grew to the point where he could not enjoy watching it with anyone who didn't share his level of passion for the show. He even brought taped sketches to parties to share with friends. Throughout college, his commitment to the show didn't waiver as he insisted on watching it live rather than recording it. On a tour of the NBC studio with his father, Fallon was enthralled just being in the studio building. He was certain that his path led to SNL; he couldn't envision any other career outcome.

Jimmy's Determination and Belief Propel Him Forward Despite Setbacks

He Persevered Through Financial Hardship and Self-Doubt In La

Fallon's move to LA involved taking classes at the Groundlings to sharpen his impressions and impersonations, which he knew SNL favored. His focus in class on joining SNL was notably specific. Despite the hardship he faced – little money, tough living conditions, and relentless rejection – Fallon maintained his resolve.

He fondly refers to the NBC building as his home, indicating his long-standing and deep connection with the network, where he has worked since 1998. These challenges didn’t deter him; they instead made him mentally stronger. There were times of profound self-doubt and financial strain to the point that Fallon considered therapy and had to grapple with the possibility of failure.

However, he acquired a holding deal with Warner Brothers Television, which eased some financial ...

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Fallon's Quest to Join SNL

Additional Materials

Clarifications

  • The Groundlings is a renowned improvisational and sketch comedy troupe and school based in Los Angeles. Taking classes at the Groundlings is highly regarded in the comedy industry for honing comedic skills, especially in character work, impressions, and improvisation. Many successful comedians, including alumni like Will Ferrell and Melissa McCarthy, credit their time at the Groundlings for helping them develop their comedic talents. For Jimmy Fallon, attending Groundlings classes was a strategic move to enhance his abilities in impressions and character work, which are essential skills for performers on "Saturday Night Live."
  • A holding deal with a television network like Warner Brothers Television is a contractual agreement that secures an actor or performer's services for a specific period, typically paying them a guaranteed sum even if no specific project is assigned. This arrangement ensures that the network has the option to cast the individual in future projects while providing financial stability to the performer during the term of the deal. Holding deals are common in the entertainment industry and can offer artists a sense of security while they pursue other opportunities or await potential roles.
  • When Jimmy Fallon negotiated a clause in his contract with Warner Brothers allowing him to leave for an SNL audition, it meant that he had the flexibility to pursue his dream of joining the "Saturday Night Live" cast without being bound by his existing commitments. This clause was crucial as it demonstrated Fallon's unwavering dedication to his goal of being on SNL, showing that he was willing to prioritize his audition for the show even if it meant potentially disrupting his current work arrangements. By securing this clause, Fall ...

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Jimmy Fallon: I Didn't Expect It To Be This Brutal! Nothing Worked. I Was Starving & Had A Suicide Pact With Myself!

Challenges and Pivotal Moments in Jimmy's SNL Journey

Jimmy Fallon's journey to becoming a cast member on Saturday Night Live (SNL) was marked by challenges, disappointments, and exciting turning points.

Jimmy's SNL Audition Felt Disappointing as He Didn't Perform His Best

Fallon's initial SNL audition involved performing various impressions, which made him nervous, especially because he was briefed that Lorne Michaels typically does not laugh during auditions. During the audition, Fallon did his first impression and felt that he blew it, which left him feeling very depressed. Despite the disappointing experience, Fallon was resolute and continued to pursue his dream of joining SNL. He felt it was a missed opportunity but remained focused on getting another chance to show what he could do.

Jimmy's Second SNL Audition Impressed Lorne Michaels and Producers With His Comedy

Fallon recalls the moment when he did an impression of Adam Sandler that was well-received. Lorne Michaels laughed at Fallon's performance, which was significant as Michaels is known for his stoicism during auditions. Producer Marci Klein complimented Fallon on his performance, which was an encouraging sign.

Jimmy's Adam Sandler Impersonation Made Lorne Michaels Laugh, Proving His Potential for the Show

Even though Fallon left his first audition feeling positive, he had to wait a couple of weeks without hearing back, initially being told that the show was looking in a different direction, which eventually led to the casting of Tracy Morgan. Nonetheless, Fallon's Sandler impression made a strong impression, which demonstrated his potential for the show.

Jimmy Offered SNL Cast Spot After Audition, Fulfilling Dream

Despite not mentioning a second audition explicitly, it's clear Fallon had significant interactions with the SNL team ...

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Challenges and Pivotal Moments in Jimmy's SNL Journey

Additional Materials

Clarifications

  • Lorne Michaels is a prominent Canadian-American television writer and producer known for creating and producing Saturday Night Live. He has been involved in various successful TV shows and has received numerous awards for his work. Michaels has a significant influence in the entertainment industry, particularly in the realm of comedy.
  • Impressions in auditions typically involve mimicking the voice, mannerisms, and characteristics of well-known individuals, such as celebrities or public figures. These impressions showcase an actor's ability to embody different personalities and demonstrate their comedic range and talent. Impressions are commonly used in comedy auditions, like those for Saturday Night Live, to assess an actor's versatility and comedic timing. Successful impressions can leave a lasting impact on casting directors and show a performer's potential to bring humor and entertainment to a production.
  • Marci Klein is an American television producer known for her work on shows like Saturday Night Live and 30 Rock. She has received multipl ...

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Jimmy Fallon: I Didn't Expect It To Be This Brutal! Nothing Worked. I Was Starving & Had A Suicide Pact With Myself!

Jimmy's Relationship With His Parents, Especially His Mother

Jimmy Fallon's career in comedy and entertainment was nurtured from an early age by his parents, most notably his mother, Gloria. Their support and influence remain a foundational element in his journey as a comedian and television host.

Jimmy's Parents, Especially His Mother Gloria, Supported His Comedic Aspirations Early On

Encouraged His Interest in Entertainment and Comedy Despite His Father’s Traditional Career Path

Jimmy Fallon's father, who worked at IBM, struck a deal with his son that involved going to college with some financial backing. However, Fallon chose to drop out of college after three and a half years to pursue opportunities in Los Angeles, such as acting classes and auditions for "Saturday Night Live." His parents were cautious but ultimately supportive of his decision to follow his dreams.

Jimmy's Mother Was His Biggest Fan, Offering Unwavering Encouragement and Positivity

Gloria Fallon's unwavering support was a critical factor in Jimmy finding the courage and confidence to chase after his comedic aspirations. Jimmy speaks fondly of his mother, noting how she consistently rooted for him, providing comfort and reinforcement. He recalls how she maintained a light-hearted spirit, even joking about finding money in his laundry, and relished in sharing his exciting moments, such as when he informed her over a payphone that Jerry Seinfeld was in attendance at his performance. Her presence in the kitchen during parties and as a perpetual audience for his attempts at humor illustrates the inextricable bond they shared.

Mother's Encouraging Support Boosts His Confidence

Jimmy acknowledges how Gloria's hearty laugh and fondness for his work buoyed his spirits, likening her feedback to a Beatles fan commenting on a musician's new album. ...

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Jimmy's Relationship With His Parents, Especially His Mother

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Actionables

- Create a 'cheerleader jar' to boost confidence in your aspirations by writing down positive affirmations and supportive messages from friends and family; whenever you need encouragement, pull out a note to remind yourself of your support network.

  • This strategy taps into the same kind of support Jimmy Fallon received from his mother. By having tangible reminders of encouragement, you can foster self-confidence and resilience. For example, if you're an aspiring writer, your jar might include notes like "Your stories make me think in new ways" or "Keep sharing your voice!"
  • Start a tradition of 'Family Talent Nights' where everyone gets to showcase their hobbies or interests, no matter how unconventional, to foster a supportive environment like the one Jimmy's father provided.
  • This activity encourages appreciation and support within the family, similar to how Jimmy's father supported his comedic interests. It could be as simple as setting aside one evening a month where each family member performs a skit, shares a new joke, or demonstrates a magic trick, creating a space where everyone's interests are celebrated.
  • Establish a 'Memory Book' dedicated to a loved one who h ...

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Jimmy Fallon: I Didn't Expect It To Be This Brutal! Nothing Worked. I Was Starving & Had A Suicide Pact With Myself!

Jimmy's Success and Diverse Career Beyond SNL

Jimmy Fallon has built a diverse career that goes far beyond his time at "Saturday Night Live" (SNL). His journey from sketch comedy to hosting widely popular talk shows, entrepreneurial ventures, and engaging in creative projects showcases his aim to spread joy and entertainment.

From SNL to Late Night and the Tonight Show

Connection and Humor Drive His Entertainment Success

Fallon, who was once voted "most likely to replace David Letterman," fulfilled this prediction by moving from SNL to "Late Night," Letterman’s show, and then to "The Tonight Show." His path after SNL included branching out into film, meeting his wife, and taking over "Late Night" from Conan O'Brien, followed by "The Tonight Show" from Jay Leno. Fallon reflects on the slew of life-changing opportunities he's encountered, attributing his success to a desire to entertain and connect with people. He emphasizes the importance of connection and humor in his life, expressing his affection for his children daily and finding joy in making others happy.

Jimmy's Entrepreneurial and Creative Ventures

Fallon not only succeeded in transitioning from "Late Night" to "The Tonight Show," but has also undertaken a variety of creative and entrepreneurial endeavors.

He recalls working with Mick Jagger on a successful sketch idea, highlighting his enthusiasm for collaboration and creativity. Fallon founded a production company, through which he is involved in producing several shows, series, and films. His experience with comedy albums, particularly the Christmas-themed "Holiday ...

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Jimmy's Success and Diverse Career Beyond SNL

Additional Materials

Clarifications

  • Jimmy Fallon transitioned from his time on "Saturday Night Live" (SNL) to hosting "Late Night," a late-night talk show that aired after "The Tonight Show with Jay Leno." After successfully hosting "Late Night," Fallon then took over as the host of "The Tonight Show" following Jay Leno's retirement. This transition marked a significant career move for Fallon, showcasing his evolution from a sketch comedy performer on SNL to a prominent late-night talk show host on a major network.
  • Jimmy Fallon collaborated with Ben & Jerry's to create the "Tonight Dough" ice cream flavor. This flavor was released as a limited edition with a portion of the proceeds going to charity. The partnership aimed to raise funds for various charitable causes while offering fans a unique ice cream flavor inspired by Fallon's work on "The Tonight Show."
  • Jimmy Fallon collaborated with Universal Studios to design a r ...

Counterarguments

  • While Fallon has had a successful career, some critics argue that his style of humor and interviewing can be too safe or lack depth, which may not appeal to all audiences.
  • The transition from SNL to "The Tonight Show" is a common career path for comedians, and some might argue that Fallon's career trajectory, while successful, is not particularly unique within the industry.
  • Fallon's entrepreneurial ventures, while commendable, could be seen as leveraging his celebrity status rather than demonstrating entrepreneurial innovation.
  • The creation of a popular ice cream flavor and designing a roller coaster, while creative, might be viewed by some as less significant contributions to culture compared to other forms of artistic expression.
  • Fallon's involvement in producing various shows and films could be critiqued for not necessarily equating to quality content, as the success of such ventures often depends on a wide range of factors beyond one individual's involvement.
  • Some might argue that Fallon's ventures into fashion with a color-changing sneaker design could be seen as a gimmick ...

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Jimmy Fallon: I Didn't Expect It To Be This Brutal! Nothing Worked. I Was Starving & Had A Suicide Pact With Myself!

Jimmy on Fame, Longevity, and Entertainment

In an insightful discussion about his own experiences, Jimmy Fallon delves into the complexities of fame, the importance of physical health and longevity, and the ever-evolving nature of the entertainment industry.

Unprepared for Fame's Challenges, Jimmy Stays Positive Despite Criticism and Rejection

Stay True: You Can't Please Everyone

Jimmy Fallon candidly shares that he was unprepared for the criticism and rejection that comes with fame. Despite expecting fame to be overwhelmingly positive, he encountered unexpected negativity, mean-spiritedness, and bad press. However, reflecting on his experience, Fallon found fame to be "cooler than cool" and emphasizes the necessity of "putting in work" and consistently showing up for his audience.

He likens his work on television to an everyday routine, such as brushing teeth—a task that, over time, you do without a second thought. His mantra remains that one cannot please everyone, a lesson he underscores with personal anecdotes about his father's tough, yet supportive, love, and advice from the Beastie Boys. Fallon pushes for authenticity, acknowledging the impossibility of universal adoration and focusing instead on what he loves doing. Despite a keen awareness of being misunderstood and the challenges of fame, Fallon remains positive through it all.

Aging, Jimmy Is More Focused on Health and Longevity

Motivated by Mother's Loss, Desire to Be Present for Children

As Jimmy Fallon enters a new stage in his life, turning 50, he shifts focus towards health and longevity. He mentions undertaking healthier eating habits, exercising when possible, and taking daily walks. He also notes that he's drinking less and seeking regular health checkups—an intentional choice to ensure he can enjoy life for a long time.

Fallon acknowledges that his approach to parenting is contrasted sharply with that of his father. He's embracing a communicative and openly affectionate relationship with his children— an influence from his mother's approach. Reflecting on his parents' lifestyle, which largely ignored health consciousness, Fallon is inspired to be financially stable and physically present for his children, expressing his love for them and emphasizing the importance of enjoying life to the fullest.

Entertainment Industry Evolves; Storytelling and Laugh ...

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Jimmy on Fame, Longevity, and Entertainment

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Counterarguments

  • While Fallon emphasizes staying true to oneself, some might argue that adaptability and willingness to change can also be crucial for long-term success in the entertainment industry.
  • Fallon's mantra of not being able to please everyone, while generally sound, might overlook the importance of constructive criticism in personal and professional growth.
  • Prioritizing health and longevity is commendable, but some might point out that not everyone has the same access to healthy lifestyle options, making this a privilege rather than a universally applicable choice.
  • Fallon's optimistic view of television's role in entertainment could be challenged by those who believe that traditional TV is becoming obsolete and that the future lies in more interactive and on-demand forms of media.
  • The belief in the enduring importance of entertainment might be countered by those who argue for a great ...

Actionables

  • You can create a personal mantra that reflects your values and repeat it during challenging times to maintain positivity. For example, if authenticity and hard work are important to you, your mantra could be "Stay true, work hard, shine on." Use this phrase when facing criticism or rejection to remind yourself of what matters most to you.
  • Start a small project that brings joy to others, like a mini podcast, blog, or video series, focusing on topics that make you and your audience laugh or smile. This could be as simple as sharing funny anecdotes from your life or curating uplifting stories from around the world, emphasizing the power of entertainment to spread happiness.
  • Incorporate ...

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