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Vanessa Van Edwards discusses the five main personality traits known as OCEAN: openness, conscientiousness, extraversion, agreeableness, and neuroticism, which fall on a spectrum and are 42 to 57% heritable, suggesting a genetic influence. However, changes are still possible, with a potential for 30 to 40% change depending on where one is on the spectrum.

Five Trait Spectrum: Openness, Conscientiousness, Extraversion, Agreeableness, Neuroticism

Personality traits are somewhat heritable, with genetics playing a significant role in how these traits express themselves.

Traits Are 42-57% Heritable, Showing Genetics' Significant Role but Allowing Change

Vanessa Van Edwards notes that every person has five personality traits which fall on a spectrum: high, medium, or low. These traits are between 42 to 57% heritable, indicating a genetic influence while still allowing for a degree of change.

Openness Denotes Curiosity and Receptivity To New Experiences; Low Openness Indicates a Preference For Routine

People high in openness are naturally curious, creative, and receptive to new experiences. They receive a [restricted term] boost when trying new things due to the DRD4 gene. Alternatively, those low in openness prefer tradition and routine.

Open People Seek Novelty; Low Open People Prefer Tradition

Those who are high in openness may find satisfaction in novelty and exploring the unknown, while those low in openness gravitate towards familiarity and established practices.

Conscientiousness Involves one's Approach to Organization and Follow-Through

Conscientious individuals tend to be detail-oriented and organized. Lifelong singles may exhibit lower conscientiousness, indicating challenges in meeting new people due to difficulties with follow-through on plans.

Conscientious People Excel With Structure; Less Conscientious Aren't Bothered by Disorganization

People with high conscientiousness appreciate organization and structure, making systematic use of tools like spreadsheets, Post-it notes, and functional purses with multiple compartments. Those with low to medium conscientiousness might be less inclined to organization yet could improve through resources like habit books.

Extraversion: Extraverts Gain Energy From Interaction; Introverts Are Drained by It

Extraversion is characterized by gaining energy from social interactions, whereas introverts might feel drained by them. People are often ambiverts and exhibit both behaviors, though some roles like sales may be better suited to those high in extraversion.

Most People Are Ambiverts, Engaging In Extraverted and Introverted Behaviors

Most individuals fall into the category of ambiverts, who can engage in both extraverted and introverted behaviors depending on the situation.

Agreeableness Concerns Teamwork and Pleasing Others

Highly agreeable people struggle with setting boundaries and often say yes to everything to be liked, which may result in overcommitting. Lower agreeableness can be beneficial for leadership roles becau ...

Nonverbal communication plays a significant role in human interactions, and one especially revealing aspect is the use of microexpressions. Vanessa Van Edwards highlights the importance and implications of these involuntary facial expressions.

Universal Microexpressions: Fear, Disgust, Anger, Happiness, Sadness, Surprise, Contempt

Microexpressions Reveal Underlying Emotions

Vanessa identifies seven universal microexpressions: fear, disgust, anger, happiness, sadness, surprise, and contempt, which convey the same emotions across different demographics. She focuses on the evolutionary aspect of certain expressions, such as a baby’s pout, which instinctively triggers our empathy. Fear, for instance, is indicated by eyes widening to reveal the upper whites, a facial cue that is unnatural unless one is genuinely afraid. Disgust manifests as a crinkled nose and flashed upper teeth, often as a reaction to bad tastes or smells but also when encountering displeasing information or experiences.

Recognizing Microexpressions Allows Empathetic Responses

Understanding microexpressions can also correlate with empathy and appropriate responses. For example, noticing a downward frown at work might prompt offering help or space, and detecting expressions of disgust or contempt could signal deeper issues that require attention. When someone is lying about their preferences, a disgust microexpression might appear, as the deceit can induce self-disgust. Recognizing surprise versus fear can also aid in assessing whether someone is genuinely uninformed or potentially hiding the truth.

Monitoring Microexpressions Aids In Detecting Deceit, Anxiety, or Contempt

Vanessa discusses the significant role of microexpressions in revealing deeper feelings and motivations. For example, contempt, which can manifest as a one-sided mouth raise or smirk, often indicates a sense of superiority and, in relationships, could predict divorce. To address this in communication, it is essential to ask probing questions and engage the other person to prevent disrespect and hatred from growing.

In social interactions, such as a handshake, people may subconsciously smell their hand after the exchange as a way to sense something about the other person’s personality. Vanessa points out that these subtle nonverbal cues can reveal much about an individual's thoughts and emotions.

Microexpress ...

Vanessa Van Edwards and Steven Bartlett delve into the nuances of making first impressions, emphasizing their critical nature and the importance of nonverbal cues, body language, and unique interactions in forming lasting images in others' minds.

First Impressions Judge Personality Traits Quickly

First Impressions Occur Before Conversation, Based On Appearance, Body Language, and Nonverbal Cues

Studies show that first impressions are 76% accurate in reflecting personality traits like extroversion, agreeableness, and conscientiousness, with neuroticism being the hardest to guess as people can hide it well. Vanessa Van Edwards mentions that personality traits can sometimes be discerned from a handshake. First impressions form in the first few seconds of seeing someone, based on appearance, body language, and nonverbal cues before any conversation starts.

Create a Great First Impression With Warm Body Language and Eye Contact

Vanessa Van Edwards highlights the importance of open body language and making eye contact when meeting new people. She notes that closed-off body language affects your voice and can negatively impact a first impression. A firm handshake, typically a mark of extroversion, is part of the first impression one gets before engaging in conversation. For women, gestures like touching their hair or lips can show physical attraction and hence make a positive impression.

Avoid Closed-Off Body Language

The universal defeat posture, involving looking down with little space between shoulders and earlobes, and keeping arms close to the sides, makes a negative first impression. Vanessa Van Edwards points out the problems with embracing closed body positions, especially as it relates to vocal power when speaking. She also advises against sunglasses in photos because they block eye contact and suggests maintaining 60% eye contact to convey warmth and competence without being too intense.

Unique Greetings and Breaking Scripts Create Memorable Impressions

To stand out and create a memorable impression, Vanessa Van Edwards recommends using unique conversational approaches and avoiding scripted interactions. She suggests asking questions that elicit positive responses and adding depth to the conversation to stand out from typical small talk. Sharing an interesting story about one's work or mentioning a passion can lead to a more engaging and memorable introduction. Being distinctive in online communications makes one memorable and piques people's curiosity.

Stand ...

Vanessa Van Edwards delves into the world of relationship dynamics, emphasizing the importance of understanding personality traits both in romantic and workplace settings.

Understanding Personality in Relationships and Workplaces

Traits' Differences Like Openness, Conscientiousness, and Extraversion Can Lead To Conflicts

People's unique "flavors" or personality traits can significantly influence dynamics within relationships and the workplace, according to Vanessa Van Edwards. It's essential to analyze one's own personality and how it might mesh with that of others. She notes that a lack of trait diversity in a corporate team might lead to shared issues and an increased chance of conflict. Similarly, differences in traits like openness can result in day-to-day relationship disputes, such as choosing a restaurant. Edwards points out that being around individuals with different traits, such as nervousness, can trigger similar feelings in oneself, potentially causing friction.

Compatible Partners Share Similar Extraversion and Neuroticism Levels

Core Trait Alignment Prevents Tension Despite Opposites Attracting

Van Edwards discusses that while people often seek individuals with diverse personalities, certain core trait alignments—such as matching levels of extraversion and neuroticism—are crucial to prevent tension in relationships. For example, a high neurotic individual paired with a low neurotic partner may face misunderstandings if one cannot comprehend the other's worry. Nonetheless, when properly managed, these differences can also lead to effective relationships.

Connecting Through Shared Experiences and "Me too" Moments

Deepening Bonds Through Genuine Interest

The concept of "thread theory," which Van Edwards introduces, revolves around creating connections through 'me too' moments in conversations, where shared interests or experiences forge bonds and release serotonin. By discovering mutual interests, such as birthdays or zodiac signs, individuals can create these moments. Showing genuine interest and avoidin ...