#156 Chris Fettes - A SEAL Team 6 Sniper’s Worst Nightmare

Chris Fettes' early life was marked by a complex ethnic heritage and tumultuous family dynamics, shaped by the demanding lifestyle of military service and the challenges of instability.

Chris Fettes was born in Austin, Texas to a Mexican father and a mother of Japanese and Irish descent

Chris Fettes candidly speaks about his mixed ethnic heritage and the impact it had on his self-perception. He acknowledges the embarrassment he felt about his appearance as a child, which has transformed into a sense of pride as an adult. Fettes' father was an abusive alcoholic who inflicted physical violence upon his mother, a trauma that left an indelible mark on the family. He shares painful childhood memories of witnessing the abuse and adulterous behavior of his father.

Fettes' family moved frequently due to his father's military service, causing Fettes to struggle with establishing a sense of identity and validation

The military service of Chris's father and later his stepfather led to a nomadic childhood. This lifestyle led to Fettes constantly being the new kid in school, which made it difficult for him to find a stable identity and a sense of belonging. Moving from Japan to South Carolina, he recalls having to conform and change himself to fit in, perpetuating a cycle that was both tiring and impactful.

Fettes' stepfather, while a good man, was unable to fully fill the void left by his biological father

Despite the challenges, Fettes acknowledges the role his stepfather played in guiding him, especially as he navigated his anger in his teenage years when he struggled with the lack of biological connection. Fettes has since understood the value of his stepfather's guidance and expressed gratitude for the effort he put into raising him.

Fettes had a tumultuous teenage years, moving between California and North Carolina, and struggled to find his place

The frequent relocations, including time spent in Monterey, California, which he holds dear, complicated Fettes' efforts to establish his identity during his adolescence. He attem ...

Chris Fettes' military career in the Navy SEALs is marked by both exceptional achievements and deeply traumatic events that had profound effects on his life.

Fettes excelled in the Navy SEAL training pipeline, including the grueling Green Team selection process

Fettes' military career began with rigorous training. He displayed remarkable perseverance and passed Green Team selection on his first try. His excellence was noted in both the SEAL training pipeline and the Green Team. Despite starting with around 60 candidates and ending with only 20-something, Fettes remained. The selection process involved current operators voting on candidates, illustrating a high level of scrutiny. Training was intense, focusing on Close Quarters Battle (CQB) and land warfare, and required attention to detail and quick adaptability.

Fettes' initial struggles in the SEAL teams were met with patience and mentorship from his platoon chief

During his early career, Fettes grappled with finding his place and seeking validation, which led to actions that could have jeopardized his future. However, his platoon chief saw potential in him and offered mentorship and guidance. This "come to Jesus" talk while Fettes was in jail exemplified personal investment in his growth. His platoon chief's decision to give him another chance and not "lose his bird" was pivotal.

Fettes deployed to Iraq and Afghanistan, where he served as a highly skilled JTAC and sniper

Deployed to Iraq and Afghanistan, Fettes served as a sniper and a Joint Terminal Air Controller (JTAC), controlling aircraft in combative situations. He earned a Bronze Star for his composite work as a JTAC. Frequent, high-paced operations were common; sometimes, he recounted working nightly up to six times a week.

Fettes was involved in a traumatic hostage rescue mission that resulted in the death of children

In Somalia, Fettes was tasked with a mission that had life-changing consequences. A precise and stressful operation led to the unfortunate death of children, leaving Fettes to grapple with the weight of this incident. The stress after realizing two of the five males encountered were children led Fettes to c ...

After a distinguished period of service, former Navy SEAL Chris Fettes faced the difficult journey of seeking a new identity and vocation outside of the military. His pathway out of the SEAL teams was driven by a desire to be more present for his family, but the transition proved to be more challenging than anticipated.

Fettes made the difficult decision to leave the SEAL teams in order to be more present for his family

Fettes chose to depart from his career as a SEAL for the sake of his family, a shift that marked the beginning of his complex adjustment from his military life to a focus on his relatives. Despite his family's belief in him, he grappled with the notion of being a "shit father," illustrating the struggles he encountered in carving out a new role for himself and attaining fulfillment in civilian life. He spoke candidly of the trauma associated with his military tenure and the difficulties he faced in sharing these experiences with his wife, something that remained only partly disclosed years after the mission.

Fettes' transition to civilian life was challenging as he struggled to find purpose and validation outside of the military

Fettes’ post-military life was marked by confusion and a sense of being lost. He revealed that, without a clear work outlet, his addictions worsened, and it took two years after transitioning to truly grasp that he wasn't fulfilling his calling. The lack of validation and purpose that he had once found in his military service triggered a period of soul-searching. This included various jobs, such as being a bank teller, which were unfulfilling and added to his sense of displacement.

After leaving the SEALs, Fettes' understanding of service shifted from seeking validation to serving alongside his comrades and ultimately his country, a realization of purpose that he carried into civilian life. He emphasized the importance of engaging in work one is passionate about, even if it means sacrificing leisure time, as he did when forgoing football to focus on crafting ice cream flavors.

Fettes' passion for his ice cream business, "Be Free Ice Cream," became his new vehicle for continuing to serve others. The name itself stems from the acknowledgment that true personal freedom is a conscious choice, a lesson he learned after clarifying his mind. His aspiration for an actual brand and store reflects his commitment and long-term vision for his business.

Fettes founded his own ice cream business, "Be Free Ice Cream," as a way to serve others and find personal fulfillment

Fettes' foundational love for cooking since childhood and his hobby of making ice cream during the COVID-19 pandemic eventually led to the formation of "Be Free Ice Cream." The business began from his home, where initial flavors were advertised on Instagram for pickups. Over time, his endeavors expanded from the garage to a comprehensive business including a bakery with two chefs, a coffee house, and a multifaceted creamery, reflecting Fettes' initiative and creativity.

The journey for Fettes involved learning to draft a business plan and ...