Financial Kinks with Sexpert Emily Morse

Love and desire aren’t driven by the same things. In fact, sometimes their ingredients are polar opposites. The ingredients for a loving, stable relationship are commitment, intimacy, and egalitarianism, while the ingredients for desire are mystery, distance, risk, and playfulness. Throw in some external pressures such as cultural messages and parenthood, and it might seem impossible to have a good erotic life within a long-term relationship.

Mating in Captivity looks at what makes up our individual sense of desire and our desire for our partners. Although desire and love may have some fundamental contradictions, there are ways to balance the clashes, and ways to manage extra-relationship stresses.

We all have negative patterns we see playing out again and again in our lives—but have you ever thought you might secretly enjoy these patterns? In Existential Kink, writer and teacher Carolyn Elliott argues that the negative patterns in our lives are manifestations of what we unconsciously desire. Embracing and taking emotional and physical pleasure in such desires (practicing existential kink) will help dissolve them. And when we dissolve these desires, they no longer have a hold over us, which frees up our time and energy so we can want and manifest positive things in our lives.

In our guide, we’ll explain existential kink and its roots in Jungian psychology, as well as the seven major principles that comprise it. We’ll also explain how to practice existential kink meditation, plus some additional activities to help you incorporate existential kink into your life. We’ll add psychological and scientific context, as well as ideas and advice from other writers and experts.

Many women constantly strive to be good enough but feel burned out and unfulfilled instead. In A Radical Awakening, Shefali Tsabary attributes this phenomenon to their compulsion to meet patriarchal standards. Women are taught to fulfill their needs for love and validation by being perfect, and when they inevitably fail to do so, they’re left feeling flawed and out of touch with their authentic selves. According to Tsabary, the way to break this cycle and achieve happiness is to detach from external standards, learn to fulfill your own needs, and let your authentic self dictate your actions and identity.

In this guide, we’ll explain how patriarchal standards impact women’s sense of identity and ability to achieve happiness. Then, we’ll explore Tsabary’s three main strategies to overcome this plight—recognizing your ego, deconstructing societal myths, and honoring your authentic self. In commentary, we’ll supplement Tsabary’s discussion with other sources on healing and authenticity like Come As You Are by Emily Nagoski and Healing the Shame that Binds You by John Bradshaw.

Many women constantly strive to be good enough but feel burned out and unfulfilled instead. In A Radical Awakening, Shefali Tsabary attributes this phenomenon to their compulsion to meet patriarchal standards. Women are taught to fulfill their needs for love and validation by being perfect, and when they inevitably fail to do so, they’re left feeling flawed and out of touch with their authentic selves. According to Tsabary, the way to break this cycle and achieve happiness is to detach from external standards, learn to fulfill your own needs, and let your authentic self dictate your actions and identity.

In this guide, we’ll explain how patriarchal standards impact women’s sense of identity and ability to achieve happiness. Then, we’ll explore Tsabary’s three main strategies to overcome this plight—recognizing your ego, deconstructing societal myths, and honoring your authentic self. In commentary, we’ll supplement Tsabary’s discussion with other sources on healing and authenticity like Come As You Are by Emily Nagoski and Healing the Shame that Binds You by John Bradshaw.

Love and desire aren’t driven by the same things. In fact, sometimes their ingredients are polar opposites. The ingredients for a loving, stable relationship are commitment, intimacy, and egalitarianism, while the ingredients for desire are mystery, distance, risk, and playfulness. Throw in some external pressures such as cultural messages and parenthood, and it might seem impossible to have a good erotic life within a long-term relationship.

Mating in Captivity looks at what makes up our individual sense of desire and our desire for our partners. Although desire and love may have some fundamental contradictions, there are ways to balance the clashes, and ways to manage extra-relationship stresses.

Lundy Bancroft’s Why Does He Do That? is a guide to how abusive men think, explaining the motivation and logic behind domestic abuse so that victims can better defend themselves against it. Bancroft draws on his years of experience as a counselor working with abusive men to shed light on how they deliberately confuse, manipulate, and intimidate their victims to get what they want. Ultimately, Bancroft hopes that readers will use his book to better assert their own humanity and independence, either leaving the relationship or demanding that their partner take responsibility for and change his abusive behavior.

This guide will break down Bancroft’s insights into the motivations and justifications behind abusive behavior and supplement them with the work of other abuse advocates writing since the book’s publication in 2002. We’ll also provide updated statistics and compare domestic abuse to other forms of violence.