#968 - Dr Rick Hanson - The Psychology of Obsession, Rumination & Letting Go

Understanding and addressing the challenges of attachment and aversion to change can lead to significant personal transformation and increase well-being.

Accepting Impermanence Reduces Suffering

In Buddhism, Recognizing the Impermanence of All Can Free Us From Attachment

Rick Hanson tackles the issue of attachment, particularly to the concept of self, which can propel individuals into a cycle of craving and a potent sense of 'me, myself, and I.' In early Buddhism, Hanson notes, recognizing the impermanence of everything is a path to freeing oneself from attachment. Ajahn Chah, a respected Buddhist teacher, suggested that happiness increases with one's ability to let go.

Letting Go: Biological and Cultural Roots

Possessive, Change-Resistant Ancestors Passed On Genes, Fostering an Innate Human Tendency to Cling To the Familiar

Hanson delves into the biological and cultural roots of attachment. He implies that our ancestors' tendencies to be possessive and resist change were survival mechanisms that have genetically passed down to us, fostering an innate human tendency to cling to the familiar.

Modern Culture Promotes Acquisitiveness and Attachment, Challenging Control Release

On the cultural front, Hanson discusses how present-day culture, which highly values acquisitiveness and accumulation, can make letting go challenging. Modern society often encourages attachment to wealth, status, and possessions, which conflicts with the principle of letting go.

Acceptance and Non-attachment Help Us Navigate Change Gracefully

Techniques Like "Don't Know Mind" and Beginner's Curiosity Free Us From Rumination and Uncertainty Aversion

Hanson recommends striking a balance between utilizing a sense of self without being overtaken by it. He advises embracing a "Don't Know Mind," akin to a beginner's curiosity, to avoid becoming mired in rumination and uncertainty aversion. By taking on the perspective of an empty vessel seeking to learn, we can move beyond preconceived beliefs and openness to novel possibilities.

Embr ...

Our relationship with uncertainty is complex, interwoven with our neurobiological makeup, psychological patterns, and the cultural context in which we live. Hanson and Williamson delve into the multifaceted nature of this relationship, examining the influences at play.

Neurobiology Makes Us Fear the Unknown and Seek Control

Hanson explains that humans have an evolutionary inclination to favor the known over the unknown. Our ancestors associated familiarity with safety, a trait that has been passed down through generations. This natural preference for familiar environments can result in discomfort when faced with uncertainty. Moreover, our uniquely human ability for "mental time travel," as Hanson puts it due to the evolution of our cortex, allows us to reminisce about the past and anticipate the future. However, this ability can also lead to ruminating on past events and fearing uncertain outcomes, thereby contributing to anxiety about the future.

Mental Time Travel Ability Can Lead To Future Anxiety

Hanson further articulates that while our capacity to reflect on the past and project into the future has its advantages, such as learning from experiences, it also has the drawback of inducing anxiety when overused. This propensity to dwell on past emotional events and worry about potential future ones is a survival mechanism that has the potential to go awry, leading to chronic stress and anxiety.

The Brain's Reward Systems Amplify Benefits of Problem-Solving Through Repetition

As we seek to mitigate these fears, our brain relies on its reward systems which bolster our problem-solving skills through repetition. That is, when we repeatedly overcome challenges, our brain reinforces the perceived benefits of control, which further heightens our discomfort with uncertainty.

Cultural Messages Value Certainty and Control

The interplay between biology and culture is profound—our cultural emphasis on accumulation, status, and mastery stands in contrast to the necessity of embracing the unknown. Hanson observes that our culture prizes material and reputational accumulation, such as property, l ...

Rick Hanson, along with Chris Williamson, discusses the benefits of maintaining an open, playful, and accepting approach to life, relationships, and personal growth. They address the challenges of rumination and the value of "not knowing," the importance of authentic emotional expression, and the joy of appreciating the small wins in everyday life.

Embracing Playfulness and "Not Knowing" Fosters Growth

Research: Play and "Beginner's Mind" Enhance Neural Connections and Adaptability

Hanson points out the importance of adopting a 'don't know mind,' which fosters an openness to new experiences and ideas. He values not being limited by preconceptions and the openness that comes with embracing uncertainty. Juvenile rat studies, Hanson mentions, indicate that playfulness encourages the production of neurotrophic factors, which in turn foster new neural connections essential for adaptability and learning.

Facing Challenges Playfully Avoids Rigid, Protective Patterns

Hanson illustrates how being playful can help in pursuing goals without over-attachment to outcomes. His personal anecdote about pursuing a woman in a playful manner exemplifies how one can avoid rigid, protective patterns and take risks without being overly concerned about results. This playfulness allowed him to feel good about the attempt regardless of the outcome. Moreover, Hanson's context of discussing open-mindedness implies that a playful mindset encourages flexibility and adaptability by avoiding strict expectations or clinging to certainty.

Emotional Expression and Vulnerability Are Courageous Acts

Bravery in Honesty and Risk-Taking Leads To Pride and Self-Acceptance

Hanson describes the 'nobility' in allowing oneself to be vulnerable, suggesting that sincere expression takes courage and often leads to personal growth and acceptance. This authentic type of interaction is seen as honest and courageous, valuable because of its rarity. He stresses that true courage involves facing the risks of failure and rejection.

Cultivating Tolerance for Difficult Emotions Leads To Self-Understanding and Resilience

By embracing a 'don't know' attitude, people can let go of trying to control everything, including others' perceptions. Hanson notes that embracing the unknown helps develop tolerance for handling difficult emotions, leading to self-understanding and resilience. Plus, letting go of emotionally charged memories after they are sufficiently worked through is crucial for moving forward and not being negatively affected by them.

Embrace the Everyday, Celebrate Small Wins For a Balanced Life

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