Podcasts > Creating Confidence with Heather Monahan > Confidence Classic: Bounce Back, Bet on Yourself, and Write Your Own Story with Nina Sossamon-Pogue

Confidence Classic: Bounce Back, Bet on Yourself, and Write Your Own Story with Nina Sossamon-Pogue

By Heather Monahan

In this episode of Creating Confidence, Heather Monahan and Nina Sossamon-Pogue share their experiences with professional setbacks and career transitions. The speakers discuss how they navigated job losses, with Monahan describing how sharing her story led to new opportunities, and Sossamon-Pogue explaining the value of controlling one's narrative while processing emotions privately.

The conversation explores resilience in modern business, introducing a mathematical perspective on life events and their changing significance over time. The speakers address the role of support networks during challenging periods, the importance of reaching out for help, and practical strategies for managing career-related stress. Their discussion balances traditional persistence-based approaches with the need for adaptability in today's business environment.

Confidence Classic: Bounce Back, Bet on Yourself, and Write Your Own Story with Nina Sossamon-Pogue

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Confidence Classic: Bounce Back, Bet on Yourself, and Write Your Own Story with Nina Sossamon-Pogue

1-Page Summary

Job Loss, Uncertainty, and Major Life Transitions

In this episode, Heather Monahan and Nina Sossamon-Pogue share their experiences with job loss and discuss strategies for navigating professional setbacks. Monahan describes how publicly sharing her story of being fired led to unexpected opportunities, including a partnership with Harper Collins. Meanwhile, Sossamon-Pogue emphasizes the importance of controlling one's narrative during career transitions while processing emotions privately with trusted confidants.

Developing Resilience and a Growth Mindset

The speakers explore the nature of resilience in today's rapidly changing business environment. Sossamon-Pogue introduces an innovative perspective on life events, suggesting that their significance can be viewed through a mathematical lens - explaining how events that seem overwhelming when young (like her gymnastics loss at 19) become smaller percentages of our life experience over time. Both speakers emphasize that while traditional "grit and persistence" mindsets have value, adaptability is becoming increasingly crucial in facing modern challenges.

Seeking Support and Community During Difficult Times

The conversation turns to the importance of building and leveraging support networks during challenging periods. Monahan shares how reaching out to her professional network during uncertainty about her book deal proved valuable, while Sossamon-Pogue discusses becoming a trusted advisor to others facing similar transitions. Both speakers emphasize that seeking help is not a sign of weakness but rather a crucial step in navigating difficulties. They also stress the importance of self-care practices, with Sossamon-Pogue recommending simple techniques like taking breaks and deep breaths, while Monahan highlights finding moments of joy and gratitude as essential strategies for managing stress.

1-Page Summary

Additional Materials

Clarifications

  • Adaptability in facing modern challenges involves being flexible and open to change in response to evolving circumstances. It requires the ability to quickly adjust strategies, approaches, and mindset to effectively tackle new and unexpected situations. In today's fast-paced and dynamic business environment, adaptability is crucial for staying relevant and thriving amidst constant shifts and uncertainties. Embracing adaptability means being willing to learn, unlearn, and relearn as needed to navigate the complexities of contemporary challenges.
  • Controlling one's narrative during career transitions involves actively managing how your story is perceived by others. This can include framing the reasons for the transition in a positive light, emphasizing personal growth or lessons learned, and being strategic in what information is shared publicly. By taking control of the narrative, individuals can shape how they are perceived professionally and maintain a sense of agency during times of change.
  • Building and leveraging support networks involves establishing relationships with individuals who can provide emotional, professional, or informational assistance during challenging times. This can be done by actively engaging with colleagues, mentors, friends, or industry peers who can offer guidance and support. It's important to nurture these connections by being genuine, offering help in return, and maintaining regular communication. Leveraging support networks involves reaching out to these contacts when needed, being open about your challenges, and seeking advice or assistance when facing difficulties.
  • Self-care practices are activities individuals engage in to maintain and improve their well-being, especially during stressful times. These practices can include physical activities like exercise, relaxation techniques such as deep breathing or meditation, and activities that bring joy and relaxation. By incorporating self-care into their routine, individuals can reduce stress levels, improve mental health, and enhance their overall quality of life. It is essential to prioritize self-care as a proactive measure to manage stress effectively.

Counterarguments

  • While sharing stories of setbacks can lead to opportunities, it can also expose individuals to public scrutiny or professional vulnerability.
  • Controlling one's narrative is important, but it's also necessary to acknowledge that not all aspects of a career transition are within one's control.
  • Processing emotions privately is beneficial, but some individuals may find that openly discussing their feelings with a wider circle can also be therapeutic and helpful.
  • Resilience is indeed essential, but overemphasizing resilience might lead to ignoring systemic issues that cause professional setbacks.
  • Viewing events through a mathematical lens can provide perspective, but it may also minimize the emotional impact and personal significance of those events.
  • While adaptability is crucial, there should also be a balance with maintaining a consistent vision and set of values, which can provide stability in times of change.
  • Building support networks is important, but it's also valuable to learn how to be self-reliant and develop internal coping mechanisms.
  • Seeking help is crucial, but there can be situations where external help is not available or sufficient, and individuals need to rely on their own resources.
  • Self-care practices are essential, but they should not be used as a substitute for addressing the root causes of stress or as a one-size-fits-all solution.
  • Taking breaks and deep breaths are good techniques, but they may not be effective for everyone, and some may require more structured mental health interventions.
  • Finding moments of joy and gratitude is important, but it's also necessary to acknowledge and address negative emotions rather than always focusing on the positive.

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Confidence Classic: Bounce Back, Bet on Yourself, and Write Your Own Story with Nina Sossamon-Pogue

Job Loss, Uncertainty, and Major Life Transitions

The conversation touches upon the delicate and often traumatic experience of job loss, while emphasizing the importance of sharing struggles, staying positive, and seeking support in the face of such adversity.

Share Struggles For Support and Growth

Heather's Post On Being Fired Leads To New Opportunities

Heather Monahan and Nina Sossamon-Pogue share their personal stories of job loss, reflecting the broader experiences many face. Monahan describes the day she was fired, having a nervous breakdown, and then publicly asking for help, which led to new opportunities that wouldn’t have come if people hadn’t known she was seeking work. Her openness about her situation led to a partnership with Harper Collins and a new book deal.

Share Experiences With Trusted Friends and Family to Process Emotions and Move Forward

Sossamon-Pogue shares her story of being let go from her job as a news anchor and how she maintained composure by ensuring her departure appeared amicable. She stresses the importance of controlling the narrative of one's termination, refraining from publicly venting anger, and instead confiding in a trusted individual to privately process emotions.

Stay Positive and Focus On What You Can Control

Feeling Angry or Defeated Is Natural, but Dwelling On Them Can Hold You Back

The conversation acknowledges that feeling angry or defeated by job loss is natural, but cautions against dwelling on these emotions as they can impede progress.

Turn Adversity Into Growth Opportunities

Monahan reflects on the importance of planning despite uncertainties in the economy and encourages focusing on what can be controlled. Sossamon-Pogue discusses the idea of turning adversity into opportunities for growth. Both speakers illustrate the importance of having a positive outlook and managing one's narrative during challenging times.

Seek Out Help and Support During Difficult Times

Network Support Offers Assistance and ...

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Job Loss, Uncertainty, and Major Life Transitions

Additional Materials

Counterarguments

  • While sharing struggles can lead to support and growth, some individuals may find that it exposes them to judgment or stigma, which can be counterproductive in certain professional environments.
  • Relying solely on friends and family for emotional support may not always be sufficient, as they might lack the necessary skills or objectivity to help someone navigate through job loss effectively.
  • While it's important not to dwell on negative emotions, it's also crucial to acknowledge and address these feelings properly, as premature positivity can sometimes lead to avoidance and unresolved issues.
  • The concept of turning adversity into growth opportunities can be overly simplistic, as it may not account for systemic issues or external factors that limit an individual's ability to bounce back from job loss.
  • The advice to stay positive and focus on what can be controlled ...

Actionables

  • Create a 'Job Loss Journal' to document your feelings and insights after losing a job, using it as a tool to reflect on your emotions and identify actionable steps for personal growth. By writing down your thoughts, you can better understand your emotional journey, spot patterns, and plan for future opportunities. For example, if you notice you're consistently writing about a particular interest or skill, this could be a sign to pursue a related career path.
  • Develop a 'Control Circle' diagram to visually map out aspects of your life you can control versus those you cannot, focusing your energy on the former. Draw a large circle, labeling the inside "What I Can Control" and the outside "What I Cannot Control." Fill the inside with actions and attitudes you can change, like updating your resume or learning new skills, and use this as a guide to direct your efforts productively.
  • Organize a mo ...

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Confidence Classic: Bounce Back, Bet on Yourself, and Write Your Own Story with Nina Sossamon-Pogue

Developing Resilience and a Growth Mindset

As the business world rapidly changes, Heather and Nina Sossamon-Pogue highlight the importance of adaptability and resilience in both personal and professional realms.

Embrace Change and Adaptability As Keys to Resilience

Definition: Resilience Is Adapting and Growing Stronger Through Adversity

Nina Sossamon-Pogue describes her own journey, noting her ability to continually reinvent herself, demonstrating resilience in the face of varying life stages and challenges. Her story, as well as George's commitment to his business despite risks, embodies the essence of resilience—sticking through uncertain times and coming out financially stronger.

"Grit and Persistence" Mindsets May Not Serve In Changing Circumstances

Sossamon-Pogue draws attention to the current challenges like the pandemic and explains that traditional mindsets of grit and persistence might falter in such times. Instead, a focus on adaptability and the ability to change is crucial.

Gain Perspective By Analyzing Life Events' Significance

Challenges Seem Bigger When Young, Shrink Over Time

With the help of a mathematical lens, Nina Sossamon-Pogue suggests looking at life's events in terms of percentages. She illustrates this by revisiting her gymnastics loss at age 19, which then constituted 85% of her life, but now, looking back from her fifties, it is only 28% due to other experiences that have since gained significance, like parenting.

Experiences Through a Mathematical Lens of Percentages

Sossamon-Pogue shares how this perspective can be applied to understand current life disruptions, like a job loss or the effects of the pandemic. By seeing these events as a fraction of one's total life span, one can recognize that their significance will shrink over time, which encourages a more adaptive and resilient view.

Choose Your Mindset and Behaviors to Support Well-Bein ...

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Developing Resilience and a Growth Mindset

Additional Materials

Clarifications

  • Resilience is the ability to adapt and bounce back from challenges. In personal realms, it involves coping with life's ups and downs effectively. In professional settings, resilience helps individuals navigate uncertainties and setbacks, fostering growth and success. Embracing change, staying adaptable, and maintaining a positive mindset are key components of resilience in both personal and professional contexts.
  • In rapidly changing environments like during a pandemic, relying solely on grit and persistence may not be enough as circumstances evolve quickly. Adaptability becomes crucial as it involves being open to change and adjusting strategies to navigate unpredictable situations effectively. While grit and persistence are valuable traits, they may need to be complemented with a willingness to adapt to new challenges and circumstances. This adaptability allows individuals to respond more flexibly to the dynamic demands of changing environments.
  • Analyzing life events' significance through a mathematical lens of percentages involves looking at events in your life in terms of the proportion they represent of your total life experience. By viewing events this way, you can gain perspective on their impact over time. This approach helps in understanding that events that seem significant in the present may dimi ...

Counterarguments

  • While adaptability and resilience are important, overemphasizing them might lead to the undervaluation of stability and consistency, which are also crucial in both personal and professional settings.
  • Resilience as merely adapting and growing through adversity can be an oversimplification, as it may also involve maintaining one's core principles and values despite external pressures.
  • Grit and persistence are still valuable traits and can be complementary to adaptability rather than mutually exclusive, especially in long-term projects or goals.
  • Using a mathematical lens to analyze life events might not fully capture the emotional and psychological impact of those events, which can't always be quantified.
  • The idea that challenges shrink over time might not hold true for all individuals or all types of challenges, as some experiences can have a lasting impact regardless of new experiences.
  • Monitoring actions for their impact on mental health is important, but it's also necessary to recognize that some negative feelings ...

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Confidence Classic: Bounce Back, Bet on Yourself, and Write Your Own Story with Nina Sossamon-Pogue

Seeking Support and Community During Difficult Times

During challenging periods such as the coronavirus pandemic, Heather Monahan and Nina Sossamon-Pogue explore the importance of seeking support and community to navigate uncertainty.

Seek Help and Encouragement From Your Network

Both speakers stress the importance of reaching out to one's network for support during difficult times.

Loved Ones Want to Support and Help You

Heather Monahan conveyed her own experience of reaching out to her professional network, which included her agent during uncertainties about her book deal. Nina Sossamon-Pogue reinforces the concept that friends and loved ones want to assist, especially when they're aware a friend is in need. She highlights the significance of calling a friend during tough situations, like the pandemic, to receive their support.

Connection Brings Meaning During Challenges

Nina Sossamon-Pogue became a person others sought advice from during tough transitions, showing the value of community support. She also mentions the importance of connecting through shared experiences and memories, such as reminiscing about college days with old friends, to ignite happiness during uncertain times.

Accept Help and Compassion From Others

Accepting help and compassion is essential for navigating difficult times.

No Shame In Seeking Help or Admitting Struggle

The speakers promote the message that there's no shame in asking for assistance. Heather Monahan shares that by asking for help after being fired, she received support and opportunities from others. Nina Sossamon-Pogue discusses the challenge of asking for help, emphasizing there is no shame in it, even for those who have been highly successful.

Helping Others Brings Purpose

Nina notes that people who offer help during crises like the pandemic can reflect and find purpose in their actions, such as by supporting a friend. She stresses that individuals often find meaning in taking care of others, even when they themselves are in difficult situations.

Prioritize Your Mental and Physical Health Through Self-Care

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Seeking Support and Community During Difficult Times

Additional Materials

Counterarguments

  • While seeking help from one's network is generally beneficial, some individuals may not have a supportive network, which can make this advice less applicable to them.
  • There may be cultural or personal barriers that make it difficult for some individuals to reach out for help, even if their loved ones are willing to support them.
  • Connection with others is important, but some people may find meaning and resilience through solitude or introspection during challenges.
  • Accepting help and compassion from others is valuable, but it's also important to recognize and respect individuals who find strength in self-reliance and overcoming obstacles independently.
  • There can be systemic issues that make admitting struggle or seeking help more stigmatized for certain groups, despite the general encouragement to do so without shame.
  • While helping others can bring purpose, it's also important to acknowledge that overextending oneself to help others can lead to burnout and should be balanced with self-care.
  • Prioritizing mental and physical health is crucial, but access to self-care resources and the abi ...

Actionables

  • Create a 'support squad' by listing five people you feel comfortable reaching out to when you're struggling, and send them a message letting them know they're your go-to for tough times. This preemptive step ensures you have a ready-made support system and can help overcome the hesitation to ask for help when you actually need it.
  • Schedule 'joy breaks' in your daily routine, where you set aside 10-15 minutes to do something that brings you happiness, like dancing to your favorite song, watching a funny video, or playing with a pet. By intentionally incorporating these moments, you're taking proactive steps towards self-care and stress relief.
  • Start a 'compassion ...

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