Podcasts > 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer > Bert Calls His Dead Grandma | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

Bert Calls His Dead Grandma | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

By Tom Segura, Bert Kreischer

In this episode of 2 Bears, 1 Cave, Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer explore the craft of stand-up comedy, sharing insights about joke development and the satisfaction of perfecting new material. The comedians also discuss Bert's experience of losing his family's bullmastiff while they were away in Hawaii, and Tom's family's transition from having a dog to owning a cat due to allergies.

The conversation then turns to potential business opportunities, as Bert and Tom consider venturing into OnlyFans creator management. They discuss their approach to helping content creators improve their profiles and debate different strategies for selecting and promoting creators, including the possibility of involving their fans in the decision-making process through social media polls.

Bert Calls His Dead Grandma | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

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Bert Calls His Dead Grandma | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

1-Page Summary

Stand-Up Comedy and the Creative Process

In a candid discussion, comedians Bert Kreischer and Tom Segura explore the artistry behind creating stand-up comedy. Bert shares his excitement about a new joke he considers his best work yet, highlighting its power in its two-word punchline. Tom agrees, describing the process of developing jokes as the most addictive aspect of stand-up comedy. Both comedians emphasize the importance of continuously refining their material, with Bert sharing examples of his latest work, including new jokes about Tom that he's particularly proud of.

Family Life and Pet Ownership

The conversation shifts to more personal territory as Bert Kreischer shares the emotional story of losing his family's bullmastiff, Mac, to cancer. While the family was in Hawaii, they had to say goodbye to Mac via FaceTime, with their assistant Pete present during the dog's final moments. In a touching twist, Bert reveals that his daughter Georgia later encountered Mac's sister at her workplace. Tom Segura adds his own perspective on pet ownership, discussing his family's transition from a dog to a cat due to his child's allergies, noting how their cat exhibits endearing dog-like qualities.

Exploring New Business Opportunities (Onlyfans)

The comedians discuss their potential venture into managing and promoting OnlyFans creators. Bert Kreischer expresses interest in helping creators enhance their profiles without seeking personal financial gain. They evaluate various potential creators, including a teacher named April Michelle and a couple seeking guidance. The hosts consider involving their fans in the selection process, with Bert suggesting Instagram polls to let fans vote on preferred content creators. They also playfully discuss the possibility of involving their team member, Patrick McCann, as a promotional strategy.

1-Page Summary

Additional Materials

Clarifications

  • Bert Kreischer and Tom Segura are well-known stand-up comedians with successful careers in the comedy industry. They have gained popularity through their stand-up specials, podcasts, and appearances on various platforms. Both comedians have a dedicated fan base and are recognized for their unique comedic styles and storytelling abilities. Their insights into the creative process and personal experiences add depth to their comedic personas and resonate with audiences.
  • Bert Kreischer's emotional story about losing his family's bullmastiff, Mac, highlights the deep bond between pets and their owners, showcasing the grief and heartache that can accompany the loss of a beloved animal companion. The use of technology like FaceTime to say goodbye to Mac underscores the lengths to which people will go to provide comfort and closure in difficult circumstances. The unexpected encounter with Mac's sister adds a poignant and serendipitous element to the narrative, emphasizing the interconnectedness of relationships, even across different animals. Tom Segura's perspective on pet ownership further underscores the impact of such experiences on families and the decisions they make to accommodate their loved ones.
  • Tom Segura's family transitioned from owning a dog to a cat due to his child's allergies. Allergies to dogs can be triggered by pet dander, saliva, or urine. Cats are sometimes considered a better option for individuals with allergies as they produce fewer allergens. This change allowed the family to accommodate their child's health needs while still enjoying the companionship of a pet.
  • OnlyFans is a subscription-based platform where creators can share exclusive content with their subscribers for a fee. Creators on OnlyFans often produce adult content, but the platform is also used by artists, musicians, fitness enthusiasts, and more to monetize their work directly from their fans. The platform allows creators to have more control over their content and earnings compared to traditional social media platforms. Subscribers pay a monthly fee to access a creator's content, fostering a closer and more direct relationship between creators and their fans.

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Bert Calls His Dead Grandma | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

Stand-Up Comedy and the Creative Process

Stand-up comedians Bert Kreischer and Tom Segura delve into the artistry behind crafting humor and the elation of perfecting a joke.

The Thrill Of Developing a Successful Joke

Bert and Tom on the Joy of a Perfect Comedic Bit

Bert Kreischer shares his enthusiasm for a new joke he is working on, one he believes is the best he’s ever written. The beauty of the joke, according to Bert, is that the punchline is just two words – making it succinct and powerful. He articulates the unique thrill that "true pure standups" experience in the process of creating something genuinely funny and then honing it to make it even more hilarious.

Tom Segura echoes Bert's sentiments, describing the process of figuring out a joke as the most addictive part of stand-up comedy. For Tom, the rush that comes from this creative success is unparalleled and impossible to quit.

The Importance Of Constantly Refining and Improving Material

Bert and Tom Continually Tweak Jokes to Perfect Their Craft

The conversation between the two comedians highlights the ongoing process of refining material in the realm of stand-up. As Tom mentions, the exploration and improvement of jokes is what underpins the continuous evolution of their craft. Bert shares an example involving a clever juxtaposition, pondering the humor in Elmer Fudd using a highly charged racial epithet.

Tom, impressed with Bert's concept, asserts that it should be an outstanding opening joke for Bert's next comedy special, signifying the potential of the bit and Bert’s comedic genius.

Bert' ...

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Stand-Up Comedy and the Creative Process

Additional Materials

Actionables

  • You can harness the power of brevity by practicing the "one-liner challenge," where you aim to express complex ideas or stories in a single, impactful sentence each day. This exercise sharpens your wit and helps you communicate more effectively in both social and professional settings. For example, instead of telling a long-winded story about your day, try to captivate your friends with a one-sentence summary that captures the essence and humor of your experience.
  • Develop your observational humor by keeping a "joke journal" where you note down everyday absurdities, contradictions, or amusing situations you encounter. Regularly revisit your entries to explore different angles and punchlines for each scenario, refining them into potential material for social gatherings or public speaking. For instance, if you notice a dog that walks like its owner, write it down and later play with the idea to create a funny comparison that could be a hit at a dinner party.
  • Experiment with the "joke swap" technique by pairin ...

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Bert Calls His Dead Grandma | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

Family Life and Pet Ownership

Bert Kreischer and Tom Segura discuss the deep emotional connections with their pets, the heartbreak of loss, unexpected reunions, and the challenges of allergies in family life.

The Heartbreak Of Losing a Beloved Pet

Bert on Family's Anguish Over Putting Down Bullmastiff Mac

Bert Kreischer openly shares his family's anguish over the loss of their beloved bullmastiff, Mac. When his family was in Hawaii, Mac's health took a devastating turn. He had been enduring cancer and, despite making it through the filming of Bert's series, was hospitalized with a grim prognosis. Ultimately, in a heart-wrenching moment, they had to make the decision to put Mac down. Bert recounts that their assistant Pete held the dog and stayed on FaceTime with their family in Hawaii while Mac was put to sleep. This allowed them to be there virtually in Mac's final moments— an experience Bert describes as brutal.

The Serendipitous Reunion With Mac's Sister

Bert Recalls Georgia Meeting Mac's Sister at Her Restaurant, Noting the Bittersweet Connection

The story unfolds with a serendipitous twist when Georgia, Bert's daughter, encounters a customer with a bullmastiff at the restaurant where she works as a waitress. After speaking with the customer and confirming details with her mother, they discover this dog is none other than the sister of their recently passed Mac. This meeting brought a bittersweet connection to Mac, and the woman's offer for Georgia to dog-sit provides a small sense of comfort and continuity.

...

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Family Life and Pet Ownership

Additional Materials

Actionables

  • Create a memory book of your pet to celebrate their life and cope with grief by collecting photos, anecdotes, and mementos in a dedicated album. This can be a therapeutic process, allowing you to revisit happy moments and acknowledge the impact your pet had on your life.
  • If you have allergies but love pets, consider fostering animals temporarily to determine which ones you're less allergic to. This way, you can enjoy the companionship of pets without the long-term commitment, and it helps you identify which animals are more suitable for your home environment.
  • Start a local support group for ...

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Bert Calls His Dead Grandma | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

Exploring New Business Opportunities (Onlyfans)

Comedians Bert Kreischer and Tom Segura are exploring the novel idea of managing and promoting OnlyFans creators, a realm that promises both new opportunities and challenges.

Considering Managing and Promoting Onlyfans Creators

Bert and Tom Explore Managing and Promoting Onlyfans Creators, Highlighting Benefits and Challenges

Bert Kreischer articulates his aspiration to aid OnlyFans creators in enhancing their profiles by generating content that caters to audiences without seeking financial gain for himself. Hearing an elevator pitch from a listener, Bert and Tom consider expanding their media empire to include the management and promotion of OnlyFans creators, starting with one listener's fiancé, Chelsea, who is eager to launch an OnlyFans account. Kreischer and Segura reflect on the prospect of other podcast groups starting OnlyFans accounts, sensing an opportunity in this space.

Evaluating Potential Onlyfans Partners

Hosts Assess Onlyfans Model Applicants For Fit and Viability

Their deliberations include evaluating potential creators like Julia, who they believe possesses promising qualities for their OnlyFans venture. Bert suggests extending the search for another week and setting up conference calls to assess the authenticity of applicants. They also consider an email from a creator who proposes humorous, parody-like videos, as well as a message from Kira in Oregon, who plans to reboot her OnlyFans content inspired by an old episode of Bert and Tom's show, "Your Mom's House" (YMH).

April Michelle, described as a MILF and a teacher with a developing Twitter following, intrigues the hosts with her authentic appeal. They debate the idea of subscribing to April's Onlyfans for "the show's purposes." Alongside Bert’s noted fascination with under-boob tattoos, which he feels thrive on Onlyfans, they also examine a silent submission from a potential creator named Chanel.

Selecting and Supporting Onlyfans Creators

Bert and Tom's Plan to Involve Fans In Supporting Onlyfans Creator(s)

Bert and Tom find the concept of promoting an OnlyFans couple compelling, as they review an application from a duo seeking guidance on what to do on cam ...

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Exploring New Business Opportunities (Onlyfans)

Additional Materials

Clarifications

  • OnlyFans is a subscription-based content platform where creators can share exclusive content with their subscribers for a fee. Creators on OnlyFans often produce adult-oriented content, but the platform is also used by various creators like artists, fitness enthusiasts, chefs, and more. Users can subscribe to their favorite creators to access their content, which can include photos, videos, live streams, and messages. OnlyFans has gained popularity for providing a direct channel for creators to monetize their content and engage with their fans on a more personal level.
  • Bert Kreischer and Tom Segura are well-known comedians and podcast hosts in the entertainment industry. They have a popular podcast called "Your Mom's House" (YMH) and are recognized for their humor and engaging personalities. Bert and Tom have a significant following and are influential figures in the comedy and podcasting community. They often collaborate on various projects and ventures, showcasing their creativity and business acumen.
  • The involvement of fans in supporting and selecting OnlyFans creators involves strategies like engaging fans through activities such ...

Counterarguments

  • While Bert and Tom do not seek financial gain for themselves, managing and promoting OnlyFans creators could still indirectly benefit their brand and media empire financially through increased exposure and audience engagement.
  • Expanding into managing and promoting OnlyFans creators might dilute their brand if not aligned with their core audience's expectations or values.
  • The involvement of fans in selecting and supporting OnlyFans creators could lead to a popularity contest rather than a merit-based selection, potentially undermining the quality of content promoted.
  • Building profiles that cater to specific tastes might reinforce echo chambers and limit the diversity of content and perspectives within their community.
  • Engaging fans through activities like reaction videos could lead to privacy concerns or unwanted exposure for the OnlyFans creators inv ...

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