This article is an excerpt from the Shortform book guide to "Smile" by Raina Telgemeier. Shortform has the world's best summaries and analyses of books you should be reading.
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How can parents support body positivity for teens? What should you do if your child becomes hyper-focused on their appearance?
Raina Telgemeier’s graphic novel Smile sends an uplifting message: confidence comes by focusing less on appearance and more on personal interests. Her novel not only promotes body positivity for teens but also shows parents how to support their teens through adolescent struggles.
Read on to learn how to support teen body positivity, based on the first-hand advice in Smile.
Smile & Teen Body Positivity
Through her exploration of adolescence, self-consciousness, and the horrors of dental work, Raina Telgemeier sends an uplifting message in her autobiographical graphic novel Smile: that you can achieve confidence by focusing less on your appearance and more on your interests. In this article, we’ll explore some of the first-hand advice she offers for supporting body positivity for teens, based on her own coming-of-age story.
Raina’s Fixation on Her Appearance Grows
In her novel Smile, as Raina moves further into adolescence and toward the end of her sixth grade year, she’s not only growing more aware of her appearance: She’s also increasingly interested in romance. She tells one of her friends at a sleepover that she wishes cute boys liked her—but she laments that they never will, due to her nerdy braces and her stubby two front teeth.
Raina’s concerns about her stubby teeth prompt her to dwell on other aspects of her appearance. She expresses to her friends that she’s worried her stubby teeth make her look like a baby. One friend reassures her that her teeth don’t make her look like a baby—but her pigtails do. This makes Raina self-conscious about her hair. She decides to stop wearing it in pigtails so she can look older.
Research on Adolescents & Importance of Appearance
Carl Pickhardt, author of Surviving Your Child’s Adolescence, explains that it’s normal for adolescents to fixate on their appearance. Teens tend to be hyperaware of their and other people’s appearances for several reasons: 1) Their pubescent body is undergoing rapid changes, 2) they’re keen to express their identity through their appearance, and 3) their interest in romance drives their desire to look attractive. This last reason may explain why Raina feels self-conscious about her braces and stubby teeth.
Furthermore, teens are eager to distance themselves from their childhood selves so they feel more independent, like adults. This explains why Raina feels hurt by her friend’s comment about her pigtails, as well as why Raina is excited to look older by wearing earrings.
How can adults support body positivity for teens? How can they help them to navigate their feelings about their appearance so this fixation doesn’t spiral into an unhealthy obsession? Pickhardt offers the following suggestions:
Don’t dismiss their fixation on appearance as frivolous. Saying things like “looks don’t matter!” may invalidate the reality of their experience. Paying attention to appearance is a normal, important way for teens to express their developing identities and navigate social relationships.
Encourage them to improve their appearance in positive or harmless ways. Trying out different styles of clothing and using facewash that reduces acne won’t harm them. However, if you notice the teen engaging in unhealthy behaviors, such as excessive dieting to lose weight, it could be a sign they have an eating disorder and need professional help.
Encourage them to appreciate their other strengths. Reminding them that they’re valuable in other ways beyond appearance prevents them from relying on their looks for their sense of self-worth. For instance, you can praise them for their commitment to their hobbies, their inspiring goals, and the nurturing relationships they have with their friends.
Raina’s Mom Stands Up for Her
While Raina struggles with her confidence, one instance prompts her mom to provide an inspiring example of confidence. During a dental appointment, Raina’s dentist proceeds to treat her teeth before her anesthetic fully kicks in, causing Raina to faint when the appointment is over. Her mom stands up for Raina’s needs by passionately scolding the dentist. On their car ride home, Raina gazes admiringly at her mom and tells her that what she did was cool.
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Like what you just read? Read the rest of the world's best book summary and analysis of Raina Telgemeier's "Smile" at Shortform.
Here's what you'll find in our full Smile summary:
- An autobiographical novel of one middle schooler's traumatic experience
- The self-consciousness that comes with having braces as a child
- Tips for parents whose children are struggling with coming of age
I would love to do now I’d be a woman I’d really like to do women’s body positivity people are so cot up in the world of celebrities. And that has to stop they have the money to what they want we should be all happy in our skin! Thank you for this well enjoyed.