Matthew Perry Today: Sobriety and Living With Gratitude

This article is an excerpt from the Shortform book guide to "Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing" by Matthew Perry. Shortform has the world's best summaries and analyses of books you should be reading.

Like this article? Sign up for a free trial here.

What is Matthew Perry doing today? Is he still working as an actor?

Matthew Perry is best known for his role as Chandler Bing on Friends. But since then, he’s been on life’s ultimate rollercoaster and recently released a memoir titled Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing.

Let’s look at the career and life of Matthew Perry today, and how he’s grown past his former personal issues.

Matthew Today

At 52, Perry has managed to beat some of his unhealthy patterns. This article will discuss his ongoing recovery from addiction and his current outlook on life and the future.

Beating Addiction One Day at a Time

After multiple health crises and 14 surgeries at the time of writing his memoir, today Matthew Perry is sober. He claims he quit alcohol and opiates because he got to a point where he needed too many drinks or pills to feel anything. The fear of living with a colostomy bag forever and the fear of dying before learning how to love also helped him quit. Today, he’s on Suboxone, which helps him avoid taking other opiates but makes him depressed.

Of all his addictions, he says quitting cigarettes was the hardest. He was forced to quit when he was diagnosed with emphysema and his doctors told him he would die if he kept smoking. After trying several strategies, he was finally able to quit with hypnosis.

(Shortform note: Quitting smoking is difficult for two reasons. First, nicotine, the drug in cigarettes, is highly addictive and makes the brain need it in order to feel at ease. Second, the habit of smoking itself becomes enmeshed in your routine and your daily actions become triggers for smoking. For example, if you always have a cigarette after lunch, lunch becomes a trigger because your brain has been trained to expect the serotonin rush of nicotine at that time.)

However, despite being sober, he argues that addiction is a patient disease—it can wait for the right time to resurface. He believes he can only beat it with the support of his loved ones and by fighting it one day at a time. He also thinks that if he loses his sobriety again, he would likely die since he has such a high tolerance for drugs and alcohol. If he relapsed, he would have to take an enormous amount, which would put his life in immediate danger.

(Shortform note: The fear Perry describes reflects the way opioids act on the body. First, a person develops a tolerance to opioids, which requires them to take more to have the same effect. Then, a person develops opioid dependence when they’re able to function normally with regular opioid use. Finally, addiction means that a person who is dependent on opioids is unable to quit them because of the intense withdrawal symptoms they develop. When a person has been off a drug for a certain amount of time and then relapses, it can be fatal because they’ve lost some of the tolerance to the drug.)

Mature Perry

After decades of struggling, Perry has healed some of his inner conflicts. Despite the ongoing challenges of addiction and recovery, today he is in a good place.

He’s content with his accomplishments. He’s no longer chasing fame because he finally feels that he’s enough. He doesn’t feel the need to prove himself anymore, and he can enjoy the legacy he has already created. He also feels he doesn’t need to be funny all the time to get people to pay attention and like him; he can just be himself.

(Shortform note: Perry’s contentment with the success he’s achieved shouldn’t be confused with complacency. In The 12 Week Year, the authors argue that you become great the moment you prioritize what’s important to create the life you want. Let certain responsibilities go and put your energy into the tasks that have a real impact on your life. In Perry’s case, that means prioritizing his sobriety and letting go of the pressure to maintain fame.) He’s hopeful about finding love. He regrets not having formed a family and having treated his ex-girlfriends poorly. However, his journey of healing from addiction inspired him to live the rest of his life with love and courage, rather than with fear, which he hopes will help keep him sober and find a woman to love and start a family with.

He’s grateful for having made it this far. Although Perry often questions why he was allowed to live, he is thankful for his renewed chance at life. He describes himself as a seeker of purpose and God’s presence, which he finds whenever he’s helping fellow addicts get better. Writing his memoir is one way to help others who struggle with addiction, as they might learn something from his story and feel less alone in their fights.

(Shortform note: As an addict in recovery, Perry seems to have developed healthy coping mechanisms, called mature mechanisms. In Maybe You Should Talk to Someone, therapist Lori Gottlieb discusses a classic example of mature mechanisms: sublimation, where unhealthy or inappropriate feelings and urges are channeled into something constructive. For example, a man who wants to hurt people could get into boxing. In Perry’s case, helping others overcome their addiction is an act of sublimation, as his work allows him to confront his underlying issues and share his pain in a positive way.)

———End of Preview———

Like what you just read? Read the rest of the world's best book summary and analysis of Matthew Perry's "Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing" at Shortform.

Here's what you'll find in our full Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing summary:

• Actor Matthew Perry's autobiography about health, loneliness, and addiction
• Words of hope for those who are currently struggling with substance abuse
• A look into Perry's childhood, his time on Friends, and his life after Friends

Get the world's best book summaries now