How charismatic are you? Can you tell when someone else is charismatic?
Charisma is a fascinating blend of warmth and competence. It’s a quality that can be measured and improved. In her book Cues, Vanessa Van Edwards explores this concept in depth, offering insights into how we judge others and project our own charisma.
Read on to understand Van Edwards’s charisma spectrum and discover where you might fall on it.
The Charisma Spectrum
How charismatic are you, and how do you measure charisma in others? Van Edwards explains that charisma is a balance of warmth and competence. When you meet someone, you first subconsciously judge their warmth (approachability, empathy, and kindness), then their competence (skill, confidence, and air of authority). As you interact further, you continue subconsciously judging them along these lines. (Shortform note: In The Charisma Myth, Olivia Fox Cabane defines charisma a bit differently. Cabane says that charisma is the combination of mindfulness, authority, and goodwill—these traits are magnetic because they signal to others that if they interact with you, their life is likely to improve.)
You form these judgments by perceiving their cues: verbal, nonverbal (behavioral), and symbolic signals of meaning—like kind words, crossed arms, and even the color of their shirt. Van Edwards says your brain has evolved to interpret these cues in only a few milliseconds. This helps you immediately determine whether others are trustworthy (via warmth cues) and whether you can rely on them as competent allies or leaders (via competence cues).
(Shortform note: Although Van Edwards and Cabane disagree on the definition of charisma, they agree that anyone can learn to become more charismatic by engaging in certain verbal and nonverbal behaviors. Many of Cabane’s suggestions in The Charisma Myth overlap with Van Edwards’s, but while Van Edwards is primarily concerned with what you project outwardly, Cabane also has tips for internal transformations that naturally enhance your charisma. For example, she recommends practicing mindfulness, compassion, and optimism to become more emotionally intelligent, which she says translates authentically into more charismatic behavior.)
Van Edwards describes charisma on a spectrum—you might have no charisma, some charisma, or high charisma. She also lists a range of problems (and advantages) you may have interacting with others, depending on where you fall on that spectrum. Let’s explore the spectrum of charisma now.
No Charisma: Low Competence, Low Warmth
If you fail to display both warmth and competence cues, you have no charisma. Remember that others form a subconscious first impression of you based on your charismatic cues. You may have a warm and competent personality, but if you don’t demonstrate these traits via cues, you’ll project a cold, uncaring, irrational, and incompetent image. According to Van Edwards, this image damages your credibility. People won’t be able to connect with you or see the value in what you have to offer, whether that’s strategic insight or emotional support. This undermines your ability to influence others and build relationships with them.
| Charisma, Power, and Influence Van Edwards suggests that lacking charisma disempowers you by damaging your ability to connect with and influence others. This idea echoes sociologist Max Weber’s observation that charismatic people make some of the most effective leaders, which inspired business experts to explore and teach charisma as a leadership skill. However, the notion that charisma lends itself well to leadership has since been disputed. For one thing, some evidence suggests that people with high charisma may be promoted to leadership positions they’re underqualified for and subsequently underperform. For another, some leaders use their charisma to accomplish bad acts—for example, cult leader Jim Jones was highly charismatic. That said, you may indeed find it more difficult to impress people if you’re totally lacking in charisma. Others may find you off-putting and difficult to work or make friends with, so they may be less likely to give you opportunities to lead. For example, one study found that this is the case for many Asian Americans—their colleagues rate them as less charismatic due to stereotypes, so they’re less likely to be promoted to leadership positions. Altogether, this suggests that charisma opens doors—if you want to have greater power and influence, you should become more charismatic. However, charisma alone won’t make you a good leader. |
Some Charisma: High Competence, Low Warmth
If you’re a highly competent person, you likely value skillfulness, expertise, and problem-solving abilities. You probably care that others respect you for your talents and see you as an authority, so you (unconsciously) use competence cues to project such an image. However, Van Edwards says that when you naturally favor competence cues, you may neglect to use enough warmth cues. To illustrate, former Chancellor of Germany Angela Merkel falls into this category: She was known for her competent leadership, but both her supporters and detractors acknowledged her lack of public emotion.
If your cues suggest you’re highly competent, you have some charisma—for example, people might be more willing to hear out your ideas. But since you don’t use enough warmth cues, Van Edwards says others may see you as cold and uncaring. As a result, they might find it hard to work with you, or you may have trouble making friends.
(Shortform note: You might be naturally inclined to project a competent image (at the expense of a warm image) if you’re naturally conscientious. Conscientiousness, one of the “big five” personality traits widely researched by psychologists, is associated with diligence, discipline, and achievement. Conscientious people care deeply about their performance and want others to recognize their talents and authority. If you’re very conscientious, you might take yourself too seriously or struggle with perfectionism, and you may even be prone to narcissistic tendencies, all of which can decrease your warmth and alienate you from others.)
Some Charisma: Low Competence, High Warmth
If you’re a very warm person, you likely value building genuine relationships with others and seeking to truly understand them. You probably care whether other people approve of you, feel comfortable with you, and enjoy spending time with you. Van Edwards says that as a result, most of the cues you (unconsciously) project are warmth cues, and you may neglect to use enough competence cues. Food Network host Guy Fieri exemplifies this pattern: He’s beloved for his good-natured enthusiasm, but some critics question his competence as a restaurateur.
The warmth cues you project give you some charisma—for example, people may be more willing to share personal secrets with you. However, Van Edwards explains that since you don’t display enough competence cues, others may see you as irrational, inept, or difficult to respect. This can lead them to shut down your ideas, talk over you, or override your boundaries—and since you care so much about their approval, you might find yourself tolerating their inappropriate behavior without protest.
(Shortform note: You might seem more warm than competent if you’re high in agreeableness or extroversion (two other “big five” personality traits). Agreeable people are compassionate, cooperative, and eager to avoid conflict, while extroverted people are highly sociable and communicative. Either of these traits can make you more likable and approachable—that is, warm. However, as Van Edwards notes, if you’re too agreeable, others might walk all over or take advantage of you, and you may be less likely to advocate for yourself or put your competence on display. Similarly, if you’re too extroverted, others might judge you as distractible and unfocused or incapable of working independently and therefore less competent.)
High Charisma: High Competence, High Warmth
Someone who expresses both warmth and competence cues is highly charismatic. Van Edwards says that since you project an image that’s both highly competent and very warm, you enjoy all the benefits associated with each trait—people subconsciously trust and want to collaborate with you. For example, say that you’re the only expert in finance at your job. If you project a warm, competent image, people will respect your authority and enjoy working alongside you. This will make them feel more comfortable deferring to your expertise and seeking your guidance when they need it.
(Shortform note: If you’re highly charismatic, you may also exude presence—a kind of authentic self-confidence that allows you to show up as your true self and fully engage in the moment without doubting your abilities or worrying what others may think of you. According to Amy Cuddy in Presence, this authentic self-confidence makes others perceive you as warmer and more competent, which inspires trust and collaboration, just as Van Edwards argues charisma does. You can improve your presence using many of the behavioral cues Van Edwards recommends.)
However, Van Edwards says most people aren’t highly charismatic—they tend to be dominant in one area (warmth or competence) at the expense of the other, or they may be lacking in both areas. Even if you feel that you’re highly charismatic, there may still be room to grow—learning more about how cues work can allow you to optimize your charisma by appearing warmer or more competent in different situations. For example, you might choose to use extra warmth cues during a first date to help you seem friendly and approachable.
(Shortform note: Why do different situations call for different balances of warmth and competence? Social scientists argue that your behaviors are shaped by the demands of specific contexts and environments. You likely tailor your display of warmth and competence from moment to moment to fit whatever situation you’re currently in. For example, consider how differently you act at work and at home, or how you might behave slightly differently with different groups of friends. You’re probably warmest with your family and close friends, less warm with acquaintances, and least warm at work. Similarly, you probably put more effort into seeming competent when you’re at work than you do when you’re just hanging out with friends.)
Exercise
- Think of an upcoming social interaction, like a chess club meeting, dinner party, or first date. Do you feel confident you’ll come across charismatically at this event? Why or why not?
- Van Edwards defines charisma as a balance of both warmth and competence. What balance does this social interaction call for? For example, a chess club meeting might call for a little extra competence if you want to appear skilled.
- Think of an upcoming professional interaction, like a job interview, presentation, or performance review. Do you feel confident you’ll come across charismatically at this event? Why or why not?
- What balance of warmth and competence does this social interaction call for? For example, if you’re presenting to clients, you may wish to seem a little warmer than you are with your colleagues.
