Relationships Archives

Getting the Love You Want: Exercises to Apply the Book’s Principles

Are you unhappy and have no idea why? Are you and your partner drifting apart? Can anything be done to rescue a relationship in a downward slide? We all have a deep-rooted need to be loved, but often a rift opens between our romantic partners and ourselves. Over time, we may even resent the traits in our loved ones that initially brought us together. The book Getting the Love You Want: A Guide for Couples explores these ideas and offers solutions. Keep reading for two Getting the Love You Want exercises that will help you apply the book’s principles.

Importance of Good Friends: 4 Reasons Friendship Matters

What is the importance of good friends? What aspects of life depend on friendship? Friendships allow us to be with like-minded people who help us grow. Outside of sharing interests, friendships can benefit other areas of our lives, such as our romantic relationships and self-esteem. Let’s break down the importance of good friends by looking at four reasons why they matter in your personal life.

Longing for the Perfect Love: Is It Healthy?

Why do we long for love or seek out a soulmate? Is longing for love healthy? In her book Bittersweet, Susan Cain explores the complexities of our desire for love and connection. While some argue that longing for an ideal love is natural and sacred, others warn that seeking a perfect partner can prevent us from finding true happiness. Read on to learn about the advantages and disadvantages of longing for love, according to Cain.

Individualist vs. Relationalist Views of Marriage (David Brooks)

Does your marriage leave you with unmet expectations? What sacrifices should marriage require? David Brooks compares two approaches to life and, thus, marriage. The first approach is characteristic of individualism, which prioritizes personal liberty and spurns commitment. The second approach is characteristic of relationalism, which celebrates community and prizes commitment. Continue reading to learn about two views of marriage based on these two approaches to life.

What Is the Purpose of Sadness? The Benefits of Being Sad

What’s the purpose of sadness? Why is sadness such an important emotion? Can sadness be beneficial? Sadness is often seen as a negative emotion—something to be avoided or suppressed—but according to best-selling author Susan Cain, it serves a powerful purpose in our lives. In her book Bittersweet, Cain argues that sadness is a prosocial emotion that inspires compassion and empathy for others. Read on to learn what the purpose of sadness is and why it’s so important, according to Cain.

Empathetic Connections: How & Why They Form

What are empathetic connections? What purpose do they serve? How do we form these connections? According to Susan Cain, empathetic connections are the roots of our humanity, allowing us to feel the pain of others or extend compassion to anyone who needs it. From our evolutionary past to our modern day, empathy has played a critical role in strengthening our social ties. Read on to learn about empathetic connections, including how and why we form these bonds.

How to Be More Compassionate: 3 Strategies to Practice

Want to learn how to be more compassionate? What strategies should you practice? According to Susan Cain’s book Bittersweet, learning about the power of sadness is a great way to strengthen your sense of compassion. If you want to learn how to be more compassionate, she suggests practical strategies like cultivating humility or increasing self-compassion. Read on to learn how to be more compassionate, according to Cain’s three strategies.

Before “I Do”: How to Find the Right Partner for Marriage

How can you mitigate the risk of divorce? What personality traits should you look for? How many different types of love do you need? David Brooks takes the relationalist approach to life. In The Second Mountain, he outlines the four commitments that are crucial to relationalism. One of these is marriage, and he shares his criteria for deciding whether to marry someone. Read more to learn Brooks’s advice for how to find the right partner for marriage.

How to Have a Successful Marriage: 3 Areas to Improve On

What role does blame play in a marriage? How can you get through the tough times? When should you “recommit”? David Brooks argues that you should embrace relationalism—the worldview that prioritizes selflessness and service to others—to lead a deeply fulfilling life. That includes enjoying a satisfying marriage. In The Second Mountain, he offers recommendations for how to have a successful marriage. Read on to learn how to keep a marriage commitment strong, based on the relationalist approach to life.

Our Need for Emotional Safety: Why It’s So Important

Why is emotional safety a human need? How do people achieve emotional safety? Based on Abraham Maslow’s hierarchy of human needs, psychologist Scott Barry Kaufman created a new hierarchy of needs in his book Transcend. According to him, neuroscience and psychological research reveal that we all have security needs, and he notes that emotional safety is one of them. Read on to learn why emotional safety is so important to humans, according to Kaufman.